SUNDAY, OCTOBER 2, 2016
TONIGHT’S TOP STORY: What happened to All The Trump Signs At Republican Locations On The West Side, Alex?
At Least Loony Libertarian Jim Berns’ Pal Larry Palmer Was Waving In Front Of The Cheviot DemocRAT Headquarters On Sunday.
THE LATEST POLLS: Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen is now updating his Clinton-Trump matchup numbers daily, so check White House Watch every morning at 8:30 Eastern Monday through Friday until Election Day Here.
THURSDAY NIGHT, OUR LATE NIGHT TV JOKEWATCHER liked Jimmy Fallon’s: While speaking to students at the University of New Hampshire yesterday, Hillary Clinton said, “Isn’t this one of the strangest elections you’ve ever seen?” And then college kids were like, “Uh, we’re 18. It’s the ONLY election we’ve ever seen.” Conan O’Brien said: Hillary Clinton has vowed to crack down on hackers who launch cyberattacks. She said, “If anyone’s going to abuse U.S. government computers, it’s gonna be me. Jimmy Kimmel said: The director of the FBI is warning individual states to make sure their dead bolts are thrown and locks are on. They’re using dead bolts and locks to secure voter registration websites? Maybe that’s the problem right there. Those are for bicycles. And Seth Meyers said: In an interview yesterday, Libertarian nominee Gary Johnson was unable to name any world leaders when asked who his favorite head of state was. Wow. This might have cost him the election.
HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says tonight the Jewish New Year has already begun, and in Israel, Bibi Netanyahu can hardly wait to see Obama’s Jewish New Year’s greetings.
THAT’S WHY YOUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE said they’ve see Obama’s Jewish New Year Quote, and it’s really a load of crap.
NOW HERE’S THE LATEST FROM BUNKY TADWELL, THE BARD OF CLEVES, who says Congress doesn’t seem to get much done these days:
Congressional Criminals
Congress is composed of silly fools
But let me tell you, Honey.
The one thing they’re expert at
Is taking all your money.
IN LAST WEEK’S COLUMN FROM PATRONAGE COUNTY TITLED “DemocRAT Voter Fraud Delayed” our Patronage County Commissioners were talking about how there was no more “Golden Week” for Dumbed Down DemocRATS,” after Ohio appealed a Liberal Doofus Federal Judge’s order in Columbus to the U.S. Supreme Court, and SOTUS returned the start of Early Voting in Ohio to the date provided by the duly elected General Assembly. This op-ed column never appeared at any time in the feisty Mt. Washington Press personally edited by eminently renowned publisher Dennis Nichols.
MEANWHILE, OUR MUCKRAKER is still asking if the FOP, Lodge 69, should be using a government (City of Cincinnati) email system to conduct union business.
LIBERAL LUNACY: In Human Events’ #276 is to quote Thomas Sowell: “Socialism in general has a record of failure so blatant that only an intellectual could ignore or evade it.”
JOHN GALT says, “The symbol of all relationships among such men, the moral symbol of respect for human beings, is the trade…A trader is a man who earns what he gets and does not give or take the undeserved.”
WHISTLEBLOWER SENIOR BUSINESS EDITOR MERRILL FORBES says October is the bad boy of the stock market. The Panic of 1907, the Crash of 1929, Black Monday in 1987. It’s notable for another reason, too. The performance of Standard & Poor’s 500-stock index from July 31 to Oct. 31 has a curious way of predicting the winner of the presidential election. Should the S&P 500 record a positive return from July 31 to October 31, it signals the reelection of the party in power, while a decline suggests replacement. The S&P ended September slightly below its July close, so the election results are at the mercy of the market’s October performance.
THE FREE GRAIN PARTY still stands as the last refuge of anyone who’s willing to help himself from the stores of others.
Free Grain Party Members include all DemocRATS, RINO Republicans, some TEA Partiers, quite a few Independents, disgruntled postal workers, senior citizens demanding free prescriptions, those who believe bigger government is the answer to all their problems, everybody who said “what Bill Clinton did was indefensible, but he shouldn’t be removed from office,” and those who think pork-barrel spending is OK as long as their district gets the money.
Unfortunately, that group probably doesn’t include all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters Who Put The Positively Worst President in History In The White House—Twice, and Now Plan To Give Obama a Third Term By Voting For Hillary, and get all of their information from our Obama Supporters in the Press, like the ones on Channel 5, 9, 12, and 19.
FINALLY, AT YESTERDAY’S MEETING OF THE CONSERVATIVE AGENDA, Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane what he thought about Donald Trump’s legally avoiding paying income taxes for 18 years. “Isn’t it time we had somebody that smart in the White House?” Kane said. And speaking of Hypocrisy, the Clinton Campaign now Admits Hillary Used Same Tax Avoidance “Scheme” As Trump. We can hardly wait to see how big a story our Feckless Fishwrappers publish about that.
Remember: We never print all the bad stuff we know and certain people ought to be damn glad we don’t, especially Derided DemocRAT Party Chairman David Pepper whose political history in Cincinnati contains many interesting antidotes, as this Award Winning Illustration from Artis Conception’s Archives clearly shows.
THE SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL
Although our campaign is not associated with the Failed United Way, your liberal guilt giving throughout the year still makes it all possible.
SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL HOT LINE
e-mail your stories about worthy waifs today.
AND COMING UP IN “THE WEEK THAT WILL BE”:
MONDAY (OCTOBER 3) The Blower will be celebrating Jewish New Year and we’ll be wishing everybody a Happy 5777, while we’re continuing to count down the 109 Days of Dishonesty and Division for America remaining during the Dark Ages of Obama’s Second Term, unless the First Black President in History is impeached.
TUESDAY (OCTOBER 4) we’ll be reporting the outcome of Monday Night’s Hamilton County Commissioners Debate, and our “Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers” will only be too happy to give us their opinions.
WEDNESDAY (OCTOBER 5) we’ll be reporting the outcome of Tuesday night’s Vice Presidential Debate at Longwood University in Farmville, Virginia (wherever the hell that is).
THURSDAY (OCTOBER 6) we’ll be checking to see in Whistleblower Wannabe Julian Assange has yet delivered his long-awaited “October Surprise” for Crooked Hillary
THE FIRST LINE OF FRIDAY’S (OCTOBER 7) LIMERICK IS “When the media takes a News Poll.”
AND SATURDAY (October 8) we’ll probably be wondering how we can ever find a way to celebrate National Sarcasm Month.
Plagiarism Count: Unattributed material was filched from a mere 742 different websites for the production of today’s Blower, many of our filches were from our friends at Weasel Zippers.
WEEK IN REVIEW HOT LINE
e-mail your revolutionary recaps today
Some political score-keeping items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally political score-keeping subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more.
Whistleblower Video Of The Day
The Clinton Lie Ratchet
Note: We guarantee iPhone subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.
The Whistleblower Newswire Is The Official Publication of Record For The Conservative Agenda
And The Blower believes the next 37 days will be the most important period in American History for our non-stop campaign against Political Correctness, the Devolution of American Culture, and the Liberal News Media. Congress and Kneepad Liberals in the Press will continue to lie and say really stupid things without a smidgen of journalistic integrity to advance the Liberal Agenda.
Current Whistleblower Policies and Disclaimers can be found here
The Whistleblower has always been 100% commercial free, unlike members of the mendacious news media. So if you want to buy an ad on the front page, call The Fishwrap.
