TODAY IS
SUNDAY, MAY 24, 2020
Trump’s 1220th Day In Office
WITH STILL NONE OF OBAMA AND HIS POLITICAL PERPS IN THE SLAMMER
Kung Flu Facemasks: Don’t Leave Home Without Them
This week, everybody who was still bored staying home, wearing a mask, keeping safe distances even from members of his own family during the current coronavirus crisis, and getting all pissed off impatiently waiting for his next Really Big $1,200 Economic Impact Check (hopefully before his jacked-up property taxes are due), personally signed by The Trumpster himself, e-mailed an entry to the Whistleblower Limerick Contest. 
The winner is Housebound Harry (whose wife has thoroughly convinced him doing the dishes is “not permitted” during the lockdown).
Housebound wins an official “i-Survived The Ohio Lockdown” t-shirt, autographed pictures of Mike DeWhine and Dr. Amy, and head-of-the-line pass to Andy Pappas’ Sex Doll Brothel, now cleaning their Sex Dolls after ever customer.
His winning limerick is:
On The First Day We’re Allowed To Go Out
We’ll all have good reason to shout
But we’re still out of work
Our governor’s a jerk
And his re-election is really in doubt
Perturbed In Park Hills Expands The Focus With His Shotgun Sonnet
On The First Day We’re Allowed To Go Out,
About the following, there’s not a doubt:
In barbershops, bars, stores and our back yards
We’ll be discussing liberal retards
Who have used this scam-demic to deprive
Us of our rights with their Flu Manchu jive.
The Red Chinese, WHO, Bill Gates and Soros,
And their professional liars’ chorus,
Have proclaimed us enemies of their State,
So to subdue us they must vaccinate.
When the contract tracer comes to your door
To determine if you might have a spore,
Ask to see the warrant for your arrest.
Whereupon you might politely suggest
That they place their lips firmly on your ass.
And if you happen to emit some gas
The guy in the hazmat suit won’t detect
Your donation to the greenhouse effect.
The first line of next week’s limerick is:
“Each Year At The Taste Of The Natti”