WEDNESDAY, MAY 04, 2022
TRUMP’S FOUR-HUNDRED-AND SIXTY-NINTH DAY OUT-OF-OFFICE
AND LOCAL HOSPITAL EMERGENCY ROOMS ARE FULL OF DUMBED-DOWN D-RATS AFTER HAVING THEIR ARMS TWISTED TO RALLY FOR A LOSER-LIKE JOKE BIDEN* ON FRIDAY.
We’re Still Staying Around
The day after Election Day ’92, we had to return. After witnessing an endless barrage of biased reporting and the unmitigated mess the news media made of Campaign ’92, the results of that year’s elections were not all that surprising.
The voters in ’92, 95% of whom learned all they knew by watching daily distortions on local and national TV newscasts, sent to the White House, a draft-dodging, tax-evading, dope-smoking, pants-dropping, wife-cheating liar whom we predicted would surely drag this nation down to the level of Arkansas.
We’d only planned to stay around for a short time. But even after 10,769 days (but who’s counting?) of penetrating reporting, scathing commentary, and shining the light of truth on liars and deceivers, our Kneepad Liberals in the Press (especially our Feckless Fishwrappers) still don’t get it. Their coverage of the Indecision 2022’s Ohio Primary has been just as lazy, stupid, and dishonest. “Ohio returns to Sobriety” was just plain silly. As Conservative Curmudgeon Stu Mahlin says: Ohio voters continue to embrace RINO/Establishment Socialism” was the real story. The final score was Establishment “4,” Conservatives “0.”
Cranley got his clock cleaned by the lady mayor of Dayton. The Blower declared Schnozzy Heimlich a loser the day he announced his campaign a Real Republican. Meanwhile, all 22 Trump-endorsed Republicans in Ohio and Indiana had victory parties, while baby-killer D-RATS were whining that finally Roe v Wade might be overturned.
Voters had not yet learned what those Loony Libertarians always say, that a vote for the lesser of two evils is still a vote for evil, and people who don’t stand for something will fall for anything, because no matter the outcome, you should never ever vote for a candidate you don’t really believe in. No wonder yesterday’s results were the way they were.
No wonder yesterday’s results were the way they were. All those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters Who Put The Positively Worst President in History In The White House—Twice, and Failed Trying To Give Obama a Third Term By Voting For Hillary, and get all of their “fake news” from our Biden Supporters in the Press, like the ones at The Fishwrap and on Channel 5, 9, 12, 19, and Spectrum, voted the way all those television ads told them to.
Left-wing lunatics always predict The Whistleblower will cease to exist after every Election Day, and once again this year, that prophecy did not come true. Our Quote for Today Committee says according to Mark Twain, “Reports of our death have been greatly exaggerated,” and as Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane told Political Insiders at today’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda, and now with 237 more days until the November Elections, it looks as if we’re going to have to stick around for just a little while longer.
You have only yourselves to blame.
We’re going to do it until they get it right.
So perhaps it’s time once again for Our Beloved Whistleblower Motto (Let’s all say it together):
Because wherever there’s corruption, we’ll be there.
Wherever there’s injustice, we’ll be there.
And wherever there’s a bunch of big guys beating up on a little guy, we’ll be there too…holding the little guy down. And that goes double for RINOs.
My Statement of Principles
I will provide the people of the tri-state with a publication that will tell the news honestly.
I will also provide them with a fighting and tireless champion of their rights as citizens and as human beings.
Charles Foster Kane
WHISTLEBLOWER VIDEO OF THE DAY
Amazing: America First Candidate JD Vance Wins in Ohio!
(Sent in by Faux Facebook Friend Bobby Leach, who showed up at work without his “I voted” sticker saying “I also farted, but they didn’t give me a sticker for that.”)