SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 18, 2016
TONIGHT’S TOP STORY:

‘Zombie Hillary’ responds to NYC bombing sounding ‘drugged’, looking sickly

THE LATEST POLLS: Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says America’s trust in the media has sunk to a new low—and Donald Trump is proudly taking credit. Most Americans don’t have a lot of faith in the news media anymore, and Donald Trump is proudly claiming a role in that decline. Trust and confidence in the US media to report the news “fully, accurately, and fairly” sank to a new low this year, according to a September Gallup poll. Just 32% of Americans surveyed said they had a great deal or fair amount of trust and confidence in the media, while 27%—the highest share since Gallup began polling on the issue in 1972—said they had none at all.“I’m very proud to say that I think I had a lot to do with that poll number,” said the Republican candidate for president, in an interview with New York radio host Fred Dicker on Sept. 15. “I exposed the media,” he said, earlier on in the interview.

THURSDAY NIGHT, OUR LATE NIGHT TV JOKEWATCHER liked Jimmy Fallon’s “We have Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump on the show tonight, which means security is very tight. On their way in, everyone in the audience had to put their keys into a tray and their deplorables into a basket” and “Hillary Clinton is featured in the upcoming issue of Women’s Health magazine. While next month she’ll be featured in “Bad Timing” magazine.” Conan O’Brien said: “Donald Trump admitted to Dr. Oz that he is overweight, loves fast food, and doesn’t exercise. In a related story, Trump just won Wisconsin.” James Corden told a Trump and Hillary joke, but it didn’t make the cut.

HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says on this date in 1793, the US Capitol cornerstone was laid, and members of Congress on both sides of the aisle have been spending over-taxed payers’ money like drunken sailors ever since.

THAT’S WHY OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE chose Ronald Reagan’s: “We could say they spend like drunken sailors, but that would be unfair to drunken sailors because the sailors are spending their own money.”

MORE PUTRID POETRY: It’s almost time for our Autumnal Equinox, and we have another timely poem from Bunky Tadwell, the Bard of Cleves.              

           Autumn Amour
          Fall is here
          Girls cover up
          Now there’s more to take off
          Before boys can start to shtup!

IN THIS WEEK’S COLUMN FROM PATRONAGE COUNTY TITLED “KRAUTFEST” our Patronage County Commissioners were talking about why  only in the Blue Chip City could Oktoberfest take place in the middle of September and nobody ask why. This op-ed column first appeared in the feisty Mt. Washington Press personally edited by eminently renowned publisher Dennis Nichols on September 18, 1985.

MEANWHILE, OUR MUCKRAKER is following up on last week’s last week’s story from Investigative Reporter Jim McNair (who used to be at the Kentucky Center for Investigative Reporting and is now turning over rocks at CityBeat) about Hamilton County Demo-Labor Party Boss Tim Burka and Charles Foster Kane’s Good Friend, Hamilton County Prosecutor “JayWalking Joe” Deters.

LIBERAL LUNACY: In Human Events’ “365 Ways to Drive a Liberal Crazy#268 is to ask a liberal, “If God really cares about cruelty to animals, how come he made foie gras taste so delicious?”

JOHN GALT says, “I started my life with a single absolute: that the world was mine to shape in the image of my highest values and never to be given up to a lesser standard, no matter how long or hard the struggle.

WHISTLEBLOWER SENIOR BUSINESS EDITOR MERRILL FORBES says Stocks ticked up last week as volatility returned to the market. The Dow Jones Industrial Average and the S&P 500 logged three straight days of swings of 1% or more after a quiet period that lasted for nearly three months. Overall, the indexes are up by 4% to 5% year-to-date.

THE FREE GRAIN PARTY still stands as the last refuge of anyone who’s willing to help himself from the stores of others.

Free Grain Party Members include all DemocRATS, RINO Republicans, some TEA Partiers, quite a few Independents, disgruntled postal workers, senior citizens demanding free prescriptions, those who believe bigger government is the answer to all their problems, everybody who said “what Bill Clinton did was indefensible, but he shouldn’t be removed from office,” and those who think pork-barrel spending is OK as long as their district gets the money.

Unfortunately, that group probably doesn’t include all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters Who Put The Positively Worst President in History In The White House—Twice, and Now Plan To Give Obama a Third Term By Voting For Hillary, and get all of their information from our Obama Supporters in the Press, like the ones on Channel 5, 9, 12, and 19.

FINALLY, AT YESTERDAY’S MEETING OF THE CONSERVATIVE AGENDA, Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane why we haven’t heard much about Libertarian Presidential candidate Gary Johnson in The Blower.  Maybe it’s some of the stupid things Johnson says,” Kane explained. Following on the heels of Johnson’s embarrassing gaffe last week not knowing what Aleppo was, he outdid himself this morning on CNN’s “Reliable Sources” when he said he was glad “nobody got hurt” while discussing the bombings in New Jersey and New York City and the knife attack in Minnesota. At least local Libertarian Jim Berns has found a useful way to spend his time during the 2016 campaign.

Remember: We never print all the bad stuff we know and certain people ought to be damn glad we don’t, especially Ohio Governor Alfred E. Kasich, still living his Wet Dream as a candidate for President, as this Award Winning Illustration from Artis Conception’s Archives clearly shows.

THE SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL

Although our campaign is not associated with the Failed United Way, your liberal guilt giving throughout the year still makes it all possible.

                   SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL HOT LINE
e-mail your stories about worthy waifs today.

AND COMING UP IN “THE WEEK THAT WILL BE”:

MONDAY (SEPTEMBER 19) The Blower will will featuring our “Negative Advertsing” E-dition,, while we’re continuing to count down the 123 Days of Dishonesty and Division for America remaining during the Dark Ages of Obama’s Second Term, unless the First Black President in History is impeached.

TUESDAY (SEPTEMBER 20) we’ll checking to see if there was any other news about Hillary’s latest stumble on the campaign trail, and our “Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers” will be offering their political diagnoses.

WEDNESDAY (SEPTEMBER 21) we’ll still be trying to figure out if our Kneepad Liberals in the have begun to call Saturday’s ISIS Bombings in NYC a terrorist attack.

THURSDAY (September 22) we’ll be getting ready to celebrate the “Autumnal Equinox” on Thursday, hoping we’ll be able to make it sound really dirty.

THE FIRST LINE OF FRIDAY’S (September 23) LIMERICK IS “When the Reds didn’t clinch the pennant this year.”

AND SATURDAY (September 24) we’ll be checking to see if Hillary is well enough to make it to the first presidential debate on Monday.

Plagiarism Count: Unattributed material was filched from a mere 742 different websites for the production of today’s Blower, many of our filches were from our friends at Weasel Zippers.

WEEK IN REVIEW HOT LINE
e-mail your revolutionary recaps today

Some political score-keeping items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally political score-keeping subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more. 

Whistleblower Video Of The Day

Note: We guarantee iPhone subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.The Whistleblower Newswire Is The Official Publication of Record For The Conservative Agenda

And The Blower believes the next 51 days will be the most important period in American History for our non-stop campaign against Political Correctness, the Devolution of American Culture, and the Liberal News Media. Congress and Kneepad Liberals in the Press will continue to lie and say really stupid things without a smidgen of journalistic integrity to advance the Liberal Agenda.

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