Special “Pre-Holiday Un-Productivity” E-dition

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WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 23, 2016                               

It’s Even Worse Than Opening Day

image004This morning at the Conservative Agenda, Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane if employers were noticing any particular lack of productivity from their employees on the days before holidays.

 image017“If the number of people wasting all that time on Facebook today telling all their BFFs about why they don’t like having Thanksgiving dinner with their incorrigible relatives is any indication,” Kane explained, “Employers surely aren’t getting their money’s worth today. Add to that, the number of slackers telling each other what they’re totally thankful for on Thanksgiving, and you see why The Blower’s constantly reminding our Persons of Consequence to read our words of wisdom on their computers at home instead of on the job.

image017image005And our Compassionate Conservative wonders if you’ve seen where 22,000 fat-ass free loaders will be receiving FREE FOOD and turkey dinners at the FREE STORE before Thanksgiving?

image017Our Quote for Today Committee chose Ghandi’s Divine Law: “GOD CREATED man to work for his food, and said that those who ate without work were thieves.”

So to all those 22,000 thieves who are receiving FREE FOOD and turkey dinners at the FREE STORE, get your fat asses out and pick up litter, sweep the sidewalks, and clean up your RENT FREE apartments.

The Blower says they should change the name of the FREE STORE to “WORK for Your Food Store.”

image017Finally, It’s almost Thanksgiving, and you know what that means. As you try and enjoy downtime with your family, you’ll undoubtedly find a social justice warrior around your Thanksgiving table trying to force-feed you white guilt. But before we go over the river and through the woods to grandma’s house, let’s all watch Steven Crowder’s “Politically Incorrect Guide to Thanksgiving.” It is truly Politically Incorrect:

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