Your Official Publication of Record For The Conservative Agenda
TUESDAY, MARCH 20, 2018
Tonight’s Top Conservative News Stories You Won’t See On The Front Page Of Tomorrow’s Fishwrap
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Obamanation – Jon McNaughton
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— TONIGHT’S BEN GARRISON MOMENT —
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“All The Other News That’s Fit Not-To-Fake”
— TONIGHT’S REAL NEWS FROM OUR SATIRICAL WEB SITES —
(Commenting On The Top Stories Of The Day)
Teen May Sue Katy Perry Over Kiss
WORLD NEWS BUREAU – An 18-year-old American Idol contestant reportedly may sue celebrity judge Katy Perry over a kiss on the lips – his first. Perry kissed Jonny Brenn on the lips when she suddenly turned after asking him to kiss her cheek.
Sources claim the teen was forced to seek emergency treatment the next day for an “incredibly aggressive oral STD,” that resulted in a partial amputation of a small section of his lower lip.
“Sweet Jesus, one can only imagine where her lips have been. Have you seen Russell Brand? The kid’s lucky he’s not dead,” said one medical expert.
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Hillary Not Involved In Fixing Russian Elections For Putin
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Aides Gently Inform Trump He Can’t Fire Portrait Of George Washington
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Key 2018 Election Primaries To Watch
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The Whistleblower Newswire Is The Official Publication of Record For The Conservative Agenda
The Blower believes we’re still living during the most important period in American History for our non-stop campaign against Political Correctness, the Devolution of American Culture, and the Liberal News Media. Congress and the Liberal Media Establishment will continue to lie and say really stupid things without a smidgen of journalistic integrity in their effort to advance the Liberal Agenda.
Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane Says The Conservative Agenda Is Now Completing Working On Donald Trump’s Fourth 100 Days To Make America Great Again. Today Is Day Number 424. There Are Now Only 958 More Days Until Trump’s Re-election Day on November 3, 2020.
