“NOT NECESSARILY THE NEWS” (11/27/2022)

SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 27, 2022
TRUMP’S SIX-HUNDRED-AND-SEVENTY-SIXTH-DAY OUT-OF-OFFICE
AND HERE’S SOMETHING YOU WON’T SEE ON THE NIGHTLY NEWS

— TODAY’S SATIRICAL WHISTLEBLOWER VIDEO —

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Satirical Web Pages Are Not Just For Laughs And They Show A Focused Picture Of How People Are Reacting To The News Of The Day.

 Satire matters for more than one reason, but its main goal is to raise awareness about the current state of affairs and challenge their viewpoints by using humor and irony. It helps us confront the unpleasant reality and see the world as it is so that we can improve it.

A guy we’ll call “Telecaster Tadwell” wanted to ask Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane why Whistleblower Senior Spoiled Sports Editor Andy FurBall can’t use his UC playing Ohio State for the biggest loser in Ohio story today. “Local Sports News is really Fickell these days especially after UC wanted its $5 million back because the Bearcats lost all of three games this year,” Kane said.

Week In Review: November 27, 2022

TO SEE SLIDESHOW, CLICK HERE

THE ONION

Everyone agrees soccer is boring and America needs to fix it, but how? Here are ten simple ways to make soccer interesting, since the rest of the planet apparently remains intent on making us watch it every four years.

  1. Goalies must be double amputees – no more scoreless draws! Any two limbs will do.
  2. Supply one “enforcer” on each team with a taser- finally, the guy thrashing on the ground won’t be faking!
  3. Add quicksand so that anyone who takes too long on a free kick gets sucked in- move or die.
  4. Have a drunk hobo decide when each half starts and ends- bound to be more sensible than whatever the current system is.
  5. In the event of a tie, the coaches must have a duel at midfield – if it ends in a tie, it’s not a sport.
  6. If players pass the ball 10 times without shooting, the ball detonates- would put a stop to this asinine backward passing once and for all.
  7. Release an enraged bull onto the field if things get boring- “Mbappe steps up to take the free kick and OH MY GRACIOUS HE JUST GOT GORED IN THE LIVER!”
  8. Anyone who flops will be thrown into the Sarlacc Pit where they will discover a new definition of pain and suffering- there is no flopping in the Sarlacc Pit.
  9. Give half the players jetpacks and half the players surface-to-air missiles- built in Lockheed-Martin sponsorship.
  10. Instead of kicking a round ball towards a goal, players will carry or throw a more oblong ball towards a kind of “end zone” – definitely onto something here.

With just a few of these changes, soccer might have a real chance to finally catch on! Let us know any changes to the so-called “sport” that you would make!

BABYLON BEENOW…LET’S COMPARE OUR OBVIOUS POLITICAL PARODIES WITH THIS ACTUAL WASHINGTON POST REPORTGannett ordered our local Morning Fishwrap to roll back op-eds after “repelling readers” with biased articles
• Readers didn’t want to be told what to do or how to think
• They were perceived as having a ‘biased agenda’ so Readers were canceling subscriptions
• The company is decreasing its editorial output and even scaling back cartoons
• The newspapers will no longer make political endorsements beyond a local level, like when The Fishwrap endorsed Crooked Hillary For President. Can You Tell If This Is The Real Story?

THE US NATIONAL DEBT

CLICK HERE

And Today Everybody Hereabouts Is Wondering Where Trump’s Next Packed 2024 Election Rally Will Be And Clicks On “Get Tickets Here” And Winds Up On The Trumpster’s Official Campaign Fundraising Website

The Whistleblower Newswire Is Your Official Publication of Record For The Conservative Agenda

The Blower believes we’re still living during the most important period in American History for our non-stop crusade for Election Integrity and against Coordinated Leftist Insurrection and the Devolution of Our American Culture while Congress, the Deep State, and the Radical Media Establishment continue to lie to advance their Coordinated Leftist Agenda.

But first, we must see a Corleone  Political Reckoning on Election Integrity Along With Indictments And Perp Walks For Laws Broken During The Illegal 2020 Presidential Election, without which nothing else really matters.

Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane Says The Conservative Agenda is watching to see if any progress is made during the next 708 days before the 2024 elections.