— Your Official Publication of Record For The Conservative Agenda — THURSDAY, OCTOBER 26, 2017
Tonight’s Top Conservative News Stories You Won’t See On The Front Page Of Tomorrow’s Fishwrap
(Or On Channels 5, 9, 12, And 19, Either)
Here’s A Good Way To Watch The Sean Hannity Show
Without Having To Listen To Sean HannityTurn Off The Sound
And Just Read The Graphics That Come Up On The Screen During Sean’s Nightly Monologue
Isn’t It Amazing How Much You Can Learn That Way?
— Tonight’s Top Five Sight-and-Sound Bites —
MARK DICE: The Establishment is Crumbling!
Trey Gowdy Says James Comey Has To Come To Congress To EXPLAIN HIS LIES About Clinton investigation!
MARK STEYN: Everybody Was Colluding With Russia Except Trump
Tomi Lahren RIPS Frederica Wilson to SHREDS
Liz Wheeler: You’re Darn Right You Can Dress Up Your White Child Like Moana!
Tonight’s Top Three Whistleblower Political Posters From Today’s Toons
— TONIGHT’S REAL NEWS FROM SATIRICAL WEB SITES — Kelloggs Replaces ‘Racist’ Cereal Box
BATTLE CREEK, Michigan (World News Bureau) – Kellogg’s redesigned the ‘Corn Pops’ cereal box after a consumer complained about racially insensitive art on the packaging.
The cereal and snack maker replaced part of the back cover drawing of cartoon Corn Pops frolicking in a shopping mall – specifically, the single brown Corn Pop working as a janitor operating a floor waxer (below).
“Among all these light-colored characters there is a single dark one working as a janitor. Enough of these stereotypes, how about reflecting reality?” consumer Saladin Ahmed asked Kelloggs on social media.
The manufacturer apparently listened and quickly replaced the box. The new artwork features the dark Corn Pop in a hoodie and sagging pants sucker-punching one of the unsuspecting light Pops (below).
TO SEE MORE BIG HAIRY NEWS, CLICK HERE
ACLU Clarifies It’s Only In Support Of Immigrants After They Leave Womb
TEXAS—After a high profile case in which the non-profit advocated for abortion rights for an illegal immigrant, the American Civil Liberties Union issued a clarification on its positions Wednesday, specifying that the organization is only in support of immigrants who survive the first nine months in their mothers’ womb. (MORE)
TO SEE MORE BABYLON BEE STORIES, CLICK HERE
WASHINGTON—More than 50 years after the assassination of President John F. Kennedy, a Gallup poll published Thursday revealed that 68 percent of Americans now believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted like a total asshole. “Remarkably, our polling data reveal that more than two-thirds of U.S. citizens are now convinced that Oswald acted like a complete prick in planning and carrying out the brutal shooting of JFK,” said Gallup CEO Jim Clifton, adding that of those surveyed, nearly half of respondents were sure or very sure that Oswald acted like a “huge fucking jerk” in Dallas, attributing the shift in public perception to mounting evidence showing that camping out at the Texas Book Depository with the express intention of murdering the 35th U.S. president was “a total dick move.” “Additionally, 11 percent said they initially gave Oswald the benefit of the doubt, but now believe with absolute certainty that this guy was just a jackass, pure and simple. Interestingly, 7 percent now say there might have even been a second asshole involved in the shooting.” The survey also revealed that 18 percent of Americans were confident Oswald had acted “pretty damn cool.”
TO SEE MORE STORIES FROM THE ONION, CLICK HERE
— TONIGHT’S BEN GARRISON MOMENT —
“Trump Van Helsing,” a Halloween ‘toon.
Trump has shaken up establishment politics, but he also needs to go beyond building a wall and bringing back jobs. He needs to help end the IRS and the Federal Reserve. If he’s able to do that (much like Andrew Jackson was able to kick out the central bankers), then he would be doing something truly great.
TO SEE MORE BEN GARRISON ILLUSTRATIONS, CLICK HERE
The Whistleblower Newswire Is The Official Publication of Record For The Conservative Agenda
The Blower believes we’re living during the most important period in American History for our non-stop campaign against Political Correctness, the Devolution of American Culture, and the Liberal News Media. Congress and the Liberal Media Establishment will continue to lie and say really stupid things without a smidgen of journalistic integrity in their effort to advance the Liberal Agenda.
Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane Says The Conservative Agenda Is Now Working On Donald Trump’s Third 100 Days To Make America Great Again. Today Is Day Number 281. There Are Now Only 1,103 More Days Until Trump’s Re-election Day on November 3, 2020.