The Whistleblower Newswire Is Your Official Publication of Record For The Conservative Agenda

FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 15, 2017
Tonight’s Top Conservative News Stories You Won’t See On The Front Page Of Tomorrow’s Fishwrap

(Or On Channels 5, 9, 12, And 19, Either)

Tonight’s Sight-And-Sound Bites
Freedom Isn’t Free
(Berkeley Pays $600,000 For Security To Protect Conservative Speaker)

Ben Shapiro: Berkeley Police Were Happy To Do Their Job

PLUS

5 Things I Learned At Berkeley Last Night

Berkeley Police Release Mug Shots Of Ben Shapiro Protesters

Protester Arrested With Weapon at Berkeley
(Then Photo of Her With Presidential Candidate Emerges…)

UC Berkeley Faculty Calls for Campus-Wide Boycott of Class
(Faculty, Staff Claim ‘There Are Forms Of Speech That Are Not Protected Under The First Amendment’)

Protest Turns Violent In St Louis After Police Officer Cleared By Judge

Police Use Pepper Spray on St. Louis Protesters

Loesch: Protestors Bused In And Run St. Louis Down

ESPN Critic Clay Travis: ‘I Believe in Only Two Things Completely: The First Amendment and Boobs

Pelosi: It’s Not Amnesty, Just Citizenship

— TONIGHT’S POSITIVELY BEST STORY —
Boy Fulfills Wish To Mow White House Lawn – CNN #white house #trump #USA

President Trump Meets Kid Cutting the White House Lawn Who Does Not Want To Stop Cutting

— SUPPORT FAKE NEWS —

— TONIGHT’S PHOTO-SHOP EDITORIAL SPOOF ON CURRENT EVENTS FROM EDWARD CROPPER —
The Bubble: Hillary Clinton’s New Book Gets Hit From The Right And The Left

TO SEE MORE PHOTO SHOP EDITORIAL SPOOFS FROM EDWARD CROPPER, CLICK HERE

— TONIGHT’S REPORT FROM BIG HAIRY NEWS —

Did Pelosi And Schumer Sway President?

WASHINGTON (World News Bureau) – According to social media posts by Nancy Pelosi and Chuch Schumer, their dinner with President Trump (below) convinced him to provide amnesty for ‘Dreamers’ while temporarily giving up on the building of a border wall.

“I think it’s pretty clear that Pelosi manipulated the President,” said one disenfranchised GOP member. “It’s the way things are done in San Francisco.”

President Trump is expected to give his formal decision on DACA soon.

TO SEE MORE BIG HAIRY NEWS, CLICK HERE

— TONIGHT’S REPORT FROM THE PEOPLE’S CUBE —  Moments after the tyrannical dictator Donald Trump incited the peaceful nation of North Korea by rattling the “fire and fury” saber, the people’s democratic North Korean government led by the duly elected and beloved Kim Jong-Un made it known that they were stunned by the unwarranted macroaggression and vowed to respond in kind. (MORE) 

TO SEE MORE STORIES FROM THE PEOPLE’S CUBE, CLICK HERE

— TONIGHT’S BUZZ FROM THE BABYLON BEE —

‘Antifa’ Activist Unable To Join Protest After Forgetting Ski Mask In Mom’s Car
BERKELEY, CA—College student and “Antifa” activist Richard Anderson, 25, was reportedly very upset Tuesday after being unable to join a local demonstration due to accidentally leaving his ski mask in his mother’s car when she drove him over to its location. (MORE)

TO HEAR MORE BUZZ FROM THE BABYLON BEE, CLICK HERE                                                          

— NOW HERE’S TONIGHT’S FAKE NEWS FUN FROM THE ONION —

 Experts Report $37 Amount Of Money You Need To Donate To Hurricane Relief In Order To Completely Forget About It
WASHINGTON—Saying that the charitable contribution would immediately provide a clear conscience, experts reported Friday that you need to donate $37 to hurricane relief in order to completely forget about what happened. “Concerned individuals have been asking what they can do to stop feeling bad about hurricane victims, so everyone should know that a $37 donation is sufficient to allow you to move on from the disaster once and for all,” said nonprofit analyst Sandra Western, adding that a donation in that amount entitles the giver to avoid any further media coverage of the hurricane and not feel any kind of shame about the degree to which they were helping. “You can donate $25, but the notion that you could have done more might nag at you for a bit. At $37, however, you’ll be able to tell yourself you pitched in when some truly desperate people needed you most and then never think about them again. In addition, if you donate $65 or more, you can also sit out the next catastrophe with no guilt whatsoever.” Western went on to say that the guidelines did not apply to selfish assholes, who could donate nothing and immediately forget the devastation anyway.

See more stories from The Onion HERE

— TONIGHT’S BEN GARRISON MOMENT —
The Talk On Campus

MORE BEN GARRISON ILLUSTRATIONS

The Whistleblower Newswire Is Your Official Publication of Record For The Conservative Agenda

The Blower believes we’re living during the most important period in American History for our non-stop campaign against Political Correctness, the Devolution of American Culture, and the Liberal News Media. Congress and the Liberal Media Establishment will continue to lie and say really stupid things without a smidgen of journalistic integrity in their effort to advance the Liberal Agenda.

Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane Says The Conservative Agenda Is Now Working On Donald Trump’s Third 100 Days To Make America Great Again. Today Is Day Number 240. There Are Now Only 1,144 More Days Until Trump’s Re-election Day on November 3, 2020.