WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 17, 2016

Because They Were Glad Yesterday Was The Last Day To Register To Vote In Ohio

A couple of Curmudgeons showed up at this morning’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda to complain about yesterday’s “Conservative Advisory E-dition,” where The Blower was explaining that yesterday was the last day to register to vote before the March 15 primary election in now only 27 more days. Several people even downloaded Ohio Voter Registration Forms and Absentee Ballot Request Forms from the Hamilton County Board of Elections links we’d provided. 

The Blower didn’t have to be so damn helpful,” one of the Curmudgeons complained. “You’re making it easier for people to vote, and we have too many stupid people voting the way it is.”

In the past, whenever the Blamestream News Media declared voters were “Disengaged,” needed to step up, and head out to the polls, The Blower had also been guilty of the same silliness about goading people into voting.  And Our Quote for Today Committee often found it a little too convenient to use Jesse “The Body” Ventura’s “If you don’t vote, you’ll be leaving the decision to someone even dumber than you are.”

In an article for the Cato Institute, Will Wilkinson said, “If you want to be civic-minded, your duty isn’t to fill in ballots just to fill in ballots. You shouldn’t do it in ignorance, out of emotion, or to win approval from your political friends. Your duty is to vote well — to participate in a way that, at the very least, makes the outcome no worse.

“Everybody has an incontestable and absolute right to his or her vote, but that doesn’t mean it’s always right to vote. Abstaining can be a way of looking after the public good, too. Not all of us have the energy, inclination, or opportunity to learn what we need to know in order to vote well. And that’s OK. There’s more to public-spiritedness than showing up at the polls. You can run a small business or coach a kids’ hockey team with the common good in mind. That’s an expression of civic virtue, too.

“The virtue of opting out is especially clear once you grasp that more voting isn’t necessarily better voting. Specialists in public opinion have exhaustively documented the average voter’s shocking ignorance about the main issues of the day, the names of their local candidates for office, or the policies the candidates support.”

That’s why The Blower believes higher voter turnout only makes things worse — especially when those turning out are ill-informed. Just look what happened when all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters Who Put The Positively Worst President in History In The White House—Twice, and get all of their information from our Obama Supporters in the Press, like the ones on Channel 5

And even so, 47% of them did it by not voting in 2012.

Actually, most people going to the polls these days are too stupid to vote. The Blower has always believed voters should be required to pass a basic civics test before they’re given a ballot. Disingenuous DemocRATS would really love that idea. Maybe voting should be done on iPads so voters could touch pictures of the candidates’ faces, like cash registers at fast food restaurants. At least non-voters wouldn’t need more days of “Early Voting” to stand in long lines outside the Board of Elections. 

Still, at this morning’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda, Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane if all states should now include “none of the above” on their ballots. “I’m not really sure,” Kane admitted. “Even if The Fishwrap explained it to the stupid voters in another idiotorial, I’m not sure they’re smart enough to understand what it meant.”

Remember: We never print all the bad stuff we know and certain people ought to be damn glad we don’t, especially Ohio and Northern Kentucky Non-Voters in this year’s Primary Elections.

 “To vote or vote,” that is the question. Americans have a government they truly deserve.  Just look at the extremes to which people try to get you to vote by telling you “Don’t Vote.”