MONDAY, FEBRUARY 15, 2016

But You Weren’t the Only One Who Forgot

Remember when you went to grade school and you used to come on Valentine’s Day with a big bag full of Valentine’s from all of your little classmates? Remember how good you felt? Maybe that’s why we’re feeling a little low this morning, because we still can’t stop thinking about all those people who didn’t send us a Valentine this year.

BARACK HUSSEIN OBAMA, who’s been spending a undeserved over-taxed payer funded vacation weekend golfing in California while The Mooch doubles the cost with her separate over-taxed- payer-funded holiday somewhere else, didn’t send us a Valentine.

OBAMA SUPPORTERS IN THE PRESS, who were all too busy promoting the myth that Republicans are obligated to approve Obama’s nomination to replace Justice Scalia on the Supreme Court, didn’t send us a Valentine.

DUMBED-DOWN, SELF-ABSORBED, MEDIA-INFLUENCED, CELEBRITY-OBSESSED, POLITICALLY-CORRECT, UNINFORMED, SHORT-ATTENTION-SPAN, FREE-STUFF GRABBING, LOW-INFORMATION OBAMA SUPPORTERS WHO PUT THE POSITIVELY WORST PRESIDENT IN HISTORY IN THE WHITE HOUSE—TWICE, AND GET ALL OF THEIR INFORMATION FROM OUR OBAMA SUPPORTERS IN THE PRESS, LIKE THE ONES ON CHANNEL 5, who were still waiting for jobs and more free stuff, didn’t send us a Valentine.

ALL THOSE GUYS RUNNING FOR DISGRACED FORMER GOP SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE JOHN BOEHNER’S SEAT IN CONGRESS, promising not to cave in to Obama and the Disingenuous DemocRATS like Boehner did, didn’t send us a Valentine.

SENATE MAJORITY LEADER MITCH MCCONNELL, who promises not to schedule a vote on Justice Scalia’s replacement until there’s a Republican in the White House, didn’t send us a Valentine.

SENATOR ROB “FIGHTING FOR FAGELLAS” PORTMAN, who’s still hoping on an endorsement from Phil Burr-Ass and Citizens for Community Values, didn’t send us a Valentine.

OHIO TEA PARTY GUY TOM ZAWISTOWSKI, in spite of the fact that The Blower is the only publication in the universe to capitalize “TEA Party,” didn’t send us a Valentine.

OHIO FIRST DISTRICT CONGRESSMAN STEVE CHABOTHEAD, who should stop claiming he was named the most Conservative member of Congress, didn’t send us a Valentine.

OHIO SECOND DISTRICT CONGRESSMAN “BRONZE STAR BRAD” WENSTRUP, who damn near lost his endorsement from the Clermont County Republicans because he betrayed the people who elected him and voted for the Paul Ryan-Obama omnibus budget in December, didn’t send us a Valentine.

KENTUCKY FOURTH DISTRICT CONGRESSMAN THOMAS MASSIE, who says there’s still no magic pot of money in Washington, D.C. to pay for anything in Northern Kentucky, didn’t send us a Valentine.

“TAXKILLER TOM” BRINKMAN, who might not realize he has an opponent for his State Rep-Tile Seat in the Republican Primary in only 29 more days, didn’t send us a Valentine.

BUCKWHEAT BLACKWELL, who along with Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane Charles Foster Kane is a finalist for this year’s Ebony and Ivory Racial Healing Awards during Black History Month, didn’t send us a Valentine.

DILDO WORLD FOUNDER PATTY BRISBEN, whose 60%-off sale on all “Business Starter kits” ends on February 29, didn’t send us a Valentine.

MICKEY ESPOSITO, who said his dance card was full for last night’s light’s out festivities in prison, didn’t send us a Valentine.

FRANK WEIKEL, who said it was only 31 degrees at 3:00 PM this afternoon in Punta Gorda, Florida, didn’t send us a Valentine.

REVERED FORMER CONGRESSMAN BOB MCEWEN, who said it was only 74 degrees at 3:00 PM in Naples, Florida, didn’t send a Valentine.

FORMER WLW HATE RADIO TRASH TALKER DARYLL PARKS, who was really sorry after dumbed down voters in Anderson passed that Forrest Gump School Tax Hike Scam when he paid his jacked-up property taxes earlier this month, didn’t send us a Valentine.

HAMILTON COUNTY RINO PARTY BOSS ALEX T., MALL COP GOP, who didn’t get a whole lot of newspaper coverage for his Lincoln-Reagan Day Dinner last Friday when Disgraced Former Pants-Dropper-in-Chief Bill Clinton was in town for a fund-raiser for Hillary’s Legal Defense Fund, didn’t send us a Valentine.

DIMINITUTIVE DEMOCRAT CINCINNATI MAYOR JOHN CRANLEY, who says he can hardly wait until March 15 for this year’s Backstabbers Day Celebration, didn’t send us a Valentine.

ANDERSON TRUSTEE PRESIDENT ANDY PAPPAS, who’s really busy these days campaign for Hamiton County Commissioner, didn’t send us a Valentine.

LOONEY LIBERTARIAN JIM BERNS, who’s running in the Dumbed Down DemocRAT Congressional Primary against Fred Kundrata, who lost when he ran unsuccessfully for Congress as a Republican against “Mean Jean” Schmidt in Ohio’s Second District in 2012, didn’t send us a Valentine.

CONVICTED DITZY DEMOCRAT JUVENILE JUDGE TRACIE HUNTER, who’s waiting to hear if the Ohio Supreme Court will be sending her to the slammer, didn’t send us a Valentine.

REPUBLICANS FOR HIGHER TAXES, which used to be more active than they are at the moment), didn’t send us a Valentine.

LIZ ROGERS AT MAHOGANY ON THE BANKS, who was found guilty of impersonating a police officer by Butler County Judge Dan Haughey (but won’t be spending any time behind bars, since she was placed on probation for a year and must pay a $150 fine), didn’t send us a Valentine.

“MEAN JEAN” SCHMIDT, who was hoping the Clermont County Republican Party would un-endorsed “Bronze Star Brad” Wenstrup, earlier this month, didn’t send us a Valentine.

WHISTLEBLOWER ALTERNATIVE LIFE-STYLE CONTRIBUTORS BEN DOVER AD PHIL MCKREVIS, who were too busy enjoying their naughty candy hearts on Valentine’s Day, didn’t send us a Valentine.

HURLEY THE HISTORIAN, who says on this date in 1898, a massive explosion of unknown origin sunk the battleship USS Maine in Cuba’s Havana harbor, killing 260 of the fewer than 400 American crew members aboard and an official U.S. government inquiry has still not affixed the blame, didn’t send us a Valentine.

QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE, who chose Henny Youngman’s “You can’t buy love, but you can pay heavily for it,” didn’t send us a Valentine.

TEA PARTY PATRIOTS, who say there’s still time to impeach the first black president during Black History month, didn’t send us a Valentine.

DISGRACED FORMER MASTURBATING ANDERSON TOWNSHIP TRUSTEE KEVIN O’BRIEN, who probably got his revenge managing the campaign of the Dishonest Disguised Obama Liberal DemocRAT who ambushed long-time Anderson Township Trustee President “In Russ We Trust” Jackson by telling a lot of lies and successfully convinced a big bunch of dumbed-down voters that she was truly “non-partisan,” didn’t send us a Valentine.

ERIC “CALL ME CRAZY” DETERS, who still manages to get his name in The Fishwrap, even though he’s been suspended from practicing law in both Ohio and Kentucky, didn’t send us a Valentine.

HAMILTON COUNTY DEMO-LABOR PARTY BOSS TIM BURKA, who still says investigating Hamilton County Republican Prosecutor “JayWalking Joe” Deters’ 2012 voting address was “not political,” didn’t send us a Valentine.

OUR GOOD FRIEND KENTON COUNTY COMMONWEALTH ATTORNEY E ROB SANDERS, whose “This Week in Kenton Circuit Court” is bursting at the seams with ugly mugs depicting the usual druggies, thugs, thieves, and scum bags, didn’t send us a Valentine.

NORTHERN KENTUCKY DEMOCRAT DOMINATRIX KATHY GROOB, who can’t wait to invite Disgraced Former Pants Dropper-in-Chief Bill Clinton to her house in Fort Mitchell to campaign for Hillary sometime during the next 92 days before the May 17 Bluegrass Primary, didn’t send us a Valentine.

BOBBY LEACH, reminding us that there are still a little more than four more weeks to wait for BB&BJ Day, didn’t send us a Valentine.

CONSERVATIVE BLUEGRASS SENATOR RAND PAUL, who says please don’t ask what he plans to do with all that money in his Presidential Campaign account, didn’t send us a Valentine.

BELOVED WHISTLEBLOWER PUBLISHER CHARLES FOSTER KANE’S FELLOW SURVIVORS OF THE ANDERSON HIGH SCHOOL CLASS OF 1956, planning their 60-year reunion on June 4, didn’t send a Valentine.

BUNKY TADWELL, who’s still too busy watching the skies for Killer Drones over Cleves, didn’t send us a Valentine.

Remember: We never print all the bad stuff we know and certain people ought to be damn glad we don’t, especially people who didn’t send us a Valentine!

SORRY I FORGOT VALENTINE’S DAY HOT LINE

e-mail your most abject apologies today.

Some really remorseful items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally really remorseful subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more.

MORE CONSERVATIVE POLITICAL CARTOONS

Whistleblower Video of the Day

Zooey Deschanel Sings *You Forgot About Valentines Day*

Note: We guarantee iPhone subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.