TODAY IS
SATURDAY, JULY 08, 2023
TRUMP’S EIGHT-HUNDRED-AND-NINETY-NINTH DAY OUT-OF-OFFICE
AND WE’RE TRYING TO FIGURE OUT THE NEXT TIME OUR JACK-UP SCHOOL TAXES WILL BE DUE

The Four Horsemen Will Ride Again

At yesterday’s meeting of the Anderson Apocalypse, everybody agreed that the voters of Anderson Township had exactly the kind of school board they deserved, the Apocalypse would not be disbanding any time soon, and a lot of work still needs to be done.

But first, we have to update the names of the Four Horsemen, who rode white, red, black, and pale horses: symbolizing plague, war, famine, and death. We’ll need to give them names and faces for our upcoming publicity campaign.

Four of the Forest Hills Five So-Called Republicans caved into Radical Leftist Demands and voted to place a Large And Unnecessary Tax Hike For A Poorly Run School District On May 2nd’s Dumbed-Down Voters’ Day That’ll Cost Your Family Thousands More Dollars For The Forest Hills School District To Continue To Pour Your Money Down The Drain.

What a coincidence. The Number Of So-Called Republicans on The School Board is the same number as the Four Horsemen of The Apocalypse. That means we’d have to assign each RINO Board Member one of the Horsemen’s names. We’ll have to form a Holy Name Committee, just like Forest Hills had to do to select a new name for our Beloved Murdered Mascot.

At least selecting the names for our Four Horsemen will give us something interesting to do at Monday night’s meeting while the Forest Hills School Board is hiding in their Secretive Executive Session.

Forest Hills is going to have a tough time deciding which board member gets Plague, War, and Famine. But who deserves to be called Death? That person’s career in elected politics will be deceased instantly afterward.

Remember The Redskin!

WARNING: FHSD STUDENTS MAY NOT BE ABLE  TO READ THIS E-DITION BECAUSE OF ALL THE BIG WORDS