Daily Archives: July 29, 2022

“NOT NECESSARILY THE NEWS” (07/27/2022)

WEDNESDAY, JULY 27
TRUMP’S FIVE-HUNDRED-AND-FIFTY-THIRD-DAY OUT-OF-OFFICE
AND HERE’S SOMETHING YOU WON’T SEE ON THE NIGHTLY NEWS

— TODAY’S WHISTLEBLOWER VIDEO —

Obese Man Insists He’s Just Pregnant

Satirical Web Pages Are Not Just For Laughs And They Show A Focused Picture Of How People Are Reacting To The News Of The Day.

 Satire matters for more than one reason, but its main goal is to raise awareness about the current state of affairs and challenge their viewpoints by using humor and irony. It helps us confront the unpleasant reality and see the world as it is so that we can improve it.

THE ONION

The GDP (Gross Domestic Product) numbers were released today and it turns out we’re in a recession.

EVERYBODY PANIC!

We’ve got to fix this immediately! Fortunately, we’ve consulted with the highly educated economists that got us into this mess to see how we can get out of it.

Here are some great ways to reverse the recession immediately:

  1. Turn the GDP chart upside down: Wow, that was easy!
  2. Change what the word “recession” means: Why yes, the economy is experiencing good vibes. Thank you for asking, Mr. Doocy.
  3. Play the reverse card from your UNO hand that you’ve been holding onto:Oh no! The economy played its own reverse card!
  4. Think long and hard, ‘What would AOC do?’:Probably something really brilliant and progressive!
  5. Form a Congressional committee to research how to get out of recessions so they can publish their findings in 3 years:The buck stops eventually!
  6. Invade Canada and take all their GDP for ourselves:They don’t have any guns to defend themselves.
  7. Ask Ukraine for our $80 billion back:They probably haven’t spent it yet.
  8. Order a second season of Jan 6 hearings:That’ll distract everyone from their financial pains.
  9. Ask Joey, a fifth grader: He’ll know what to do!
  10. Replace the entire government with Ron Paul:We can only dream.

This should reverse the recession in a jiffy! But if that doesn’t work we can always try redefining “reverse.”

BABYLON BEE

NOW…LET’S COMPARE OUR OBVIOUS POLITICAL PARODIES WITH THIS ACTUAL WASHINGTON POST REPORTGannett ordered our local Morning Fishwrap to roll back op-eds after “repelling readers” with biased articles
• Readers didn’t want to be told what to do or how to think
• They were perceived as having a ‘biased agenda’ so Readers were canceling subscriptions
• The company is decreasing its editorial output and even scaling back cartoons
• The newspapers will no longer make political endorsements beyond a local level, like when The Fishwrap endorsed Crooked Hillary For President.

Can You Tell If This Is The Real Story?

THE US NATIONAL DEBT

 

via GIFER

— MAKE AMERICA GREAT UPDATE —

DRIVE TO TRUMP’S SAVE AMERICA RALLY IN WAUKESHA, WISCONSIN

GET TICKETS HERE

The Whistleblower Newswire Is Your Official Publication of Record For The Conservative Agenda

The Blower believes we’re still living during the most important period in American History for our non-stop crusade for Election Integrity and against Coordinated Leftist Insurrection and the Devolution of Our American Culture while Congress, the Deep State, and the Radical Media Establishment continue to lie to advance their Coordinated Leftist Agenda.

But first, we must see a Corleone  Political Reckoning on Election Integrity Along With Indictments And Perp Walks For Laws Broken During The Illegal 2020 Presidential Election, without which nothing else really matters.

Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane Says The Conservative Agenda is watching to see if any progress is made during the 104 DAYS BEFORE THIS YEAR’S MID-TERM ELECTIONS ON NOVEMBER 08 unless they’re postponed.

So why haven’t we yet seen negative attack ads in any Ohio 27th District campaigns? Patience, Persons of Consequence. With six more days until Primary Election Day Part Deux, there’s still plenty of time.

Lindsay Cole Jenn Giroux     Joe Murray