Your Official Publication of Record For The Conservative Agenda
THURSDAY, JANUARY 11, 2018
Tonight’s Top Conservative News Stories You Won’t See On The Front Page Of Tomorrow’s Fishwrap
(Or On Channels 5, 9, 12, And 19, Either)
Tonight’s Really Big Story
You Know, A Guy Could Get Himself Re-elected In Only 1,026 Days Making Statements Like That.
—Tonight’s Top Trump Tweet —
— TONIGHT’S BEN GARRISON MOMENT —
TO SEE MORE BEN GARRISON ILLUSTRATIONS, CLICK HERE
— TONIGHT’S PHOTO-SHOP EDITORIAL SPOOF ON CURRENT EVENTS FROM EDWARD CROPPER —
TO SEE MORE PHOTO SHOP EDITORIAL SPOOFS FROM EDWARD CROPPER, CLICK HERE
— Whistleblower NFL Boycott Countdown Continues —
NBC VOWS TO TELEVISE PROTESTS DURING SUPER BOWL ANTHEM, AND THE BOYCOTTS HAVE ALREADY BEGUN
— Tonight’s Whistleblower Faking News —
“All The News That’s Fit To Fake”
— TONIGHT’S REAL NEWS FROM OTHER SATIRICAL WEB SITES —
(Commenting On Today’s Top Stories)
Castro Showered Obamas With Gifts
World News Bureau – Federal documents released on Wednesday reveal Cuba’s Fidel Castro gave the Obamas thousands of dollars worth of gifts in 2015 and 2016.
The gifts were apparently a reward after Obama eased tensions with the communist regime, a measure that included removing the U.S. ban on imported Cuban liquor and tobacco.
Among the gifts from the dictator were hundreds of cigars, a humidor, and cigar cutter for the President and a hand-tooled, personalized leather and suede jockstrap for First Lady Michelle (below)
TO SEE MORE BIG HAIRY NEWS, CLICK HERE
Merciful Mark Zuckerberg Allows Three Whole People To See Conservative Post
TO SEE MORE STORIES FROM THE PEOPLE’S CUBE, CLICK HERE
Barron Trump Gets Hold Of Dad’s Phone, Sends Numerous Tweets, No One Notices Difference
TO HEAR MORE BUZZ FROM THE BABYLON BEE, CLICK HERE
Eric Trump Hooks Donald Jr. Up To Xbox, iPad, Roomba To Practice Passing Polygraph Test
TO SEE MORE STORIES FROM THE ONION, CLICK HERE
— Tonight’s Top Three Whistleblower Political Posters —
— HERE’S HOW YOU CAN SUPPORT YOUR FAVORITE FAKE NEWS SITE —
The Whistleblower Newswire Is The Official Publication of Record For The Conservative Agenda
The Blower believes we’re living during the most important period in American History for our non-stop campaign against Political Correctness, the Devolution of American Culture, and the Liberal News Media. Congress and the Liberal Media Establishment will continue to lie and say really stupid things without a smidgen of journalistic integrity in their effort to advance the Liberal Agenda.
Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane Says The Conservative Agenda Is Now Completing Working On Donald Trump’s Third 100 Days To Make America Great Again. Today Is Day Number 358. There Are Now Only 1,026 More Days Until Trump’s Re-election Day on November 3, 2020.
