FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 13, 2015
A Hero is Not Just a Sandwich
This week, everybody who says veterans and active duty personnel need to be thanked more than one day per year, e-mailed an entry to the Whistleblower Limerick Contest.
The winner is real war hero Ollie Hackworth, one of the survivors of that “Three Against a Thousand Massacre” The Blower described earlier this week.
Ollie wins an autographed picture of Sergeant York, a complete set of Audie Murphy westerns on DVD, and a FREE Bloomin’ Onion Card from Outback, since the restaurant in Anderson was closed Tuesday night due to plumbing problems. His winning entry is:
This year on Veterans Day
I’ll be going out of my way
To tell the leeches in America
To cut the crap and hysteria
‘Cause we don’t believe whatever they say.
Lt. Colonel “Bronze Star” Brad Wenstrup wrote:
This year on Veterans Day
Patriotism should be on display.
This may be one of the last chances we’ve got,
Now that our currency isn’t worth squat,
To celebrate before the US of A goes away.
Semper Si Leis submitted:
This year on Veterans Day
You can do it any old way.
Because, what the hell
With don’t ask and don’t tell
We honor them both straight and gay.
SP4 Brad Beckett e-mailed:
This year on Veterans Day
We still won’t know who is gay.
“Don’t ask and don’t tell”
Still holds for all personnel,
Even those wearing cologne and hair spray.
Colonel Danny Bubp-kiss-ass sent in:
This year on Veterans Day
There’s just one thing I want to say
“Thanks” to our brave vets
On the land, ships and jets
We owe them more than we can ever pay.
And in Kentucky, Colonel Sanders says:
This year on Veterans Day
Let’s see what The Messiah has to say,
I’m sure his rhetoric
Will be meteoric
With his teleprompter leading the way.
And from the Unlicensed Anderson Laureate (It’s not terribly mean-spirited this time, but then, he’s a Republican):
This year when it’s Veterans Day
Remember the price some had to pay
They fought Hitler and Minh
Giving their lives to win
“God bless ’em” is all I can say.
They fought in the Pacific and in ‘Nam
Some were killed by a suicide bomb
We’re proud of them all
They answered the call
And stood up to radical Islam.
In our country, we want to be free
And so far, that’s how we’re allowed to be
But our enemies won’t quit
They’ll come at us bit by bit
A courageous, strong military’s the key.
Thanks to those who gave their lives
We can’t give them enough high fives
Some lost a leg or an arm
Just to save us from harm
They’ll be saints when Judgment Day arrives.
The first line of next week’s limerick is:
“When Obama said you could keep your old plan”
MORE AWARD WINNING PROSE LATER
