THURSDAY, DECEMBER 01, 2022
TRUMP’S SIX-HUNDRED-AND-EIGHTIETH-DAY OUT-OF-OFFICE
AND HERE’S SOMETHING YOU WON’T SEE ON THE NIGHTLY NEWS
— TODAY’S SATIRICAL WHISTLEBLOWER VIDEO —
9 Exciting Careers For A Gender Studies Major
Satirical Web Pages Are Not Just For Laughs And They Show A Focused Picture Of How People Are Reacting To The News Of The Day.
Satire matters for more than one reason, but its main goal is to raise awareness about the current state of affairs and challenge their viewpoints by using humor and irony. It helps us confront the unpleasant reality and see the world as it is so that we can improve it.
A guy we’ll call “Transvestite-Teaser Tadwell” wanted to ask Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane why Ohio RINO Senator Rob “Fighting For Family Values” Portman was one of the 12 RINO Senators Who Voted With All Of The Degenerate D-RATS To Codify The “Disrespect For Marriage Act.” “For Some Queer Reason, I Guess,” Kane said.
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THE ONIONBrought to you by: PragerU Kids
It seems like no matter where you look these days, there’s some godless communist trying to groom your kids! Don’t let it happen!
Take these precautions today and groomer-proof those kiddos.
- Give them a taser in case they are approached by a public school teacher:The pink-haired ones are the most dangerous.
- Have them wear a Matt Walsh mask whenever they go outside: Groomers are terrified of him.
- Give them a Life Alert button to wear around their neck that calls Ron DeSantis if a teacher mentions sexual orientation or gender: He will arrive within 15 minutes.
- Have them carry a crucifix with them at all times: Groomers tend to hiss and screech at the sight of these.
- Give them a cell phone, then smash it with a tire iron: Then put the pieces in a blender and burn them just to be safe!
- Make sure their iPad has a parental lock: Then smash the iPad with a tire iron as well.
- Play Jordan Peterson lectures from the womb: Another nice side effect is they’ll always have a clean room.
- Launch an EMP attack to disable all wi-fi in the area: Then cover your house in tin foil to keep out any radio signals.
- Train them to say “UP YOURS, WOKE MORALISTS!” every time they see a pride flag: They will have no friends, but will be groomer-free!
- Maybe turn off that TV and have them read a good book: Actually, just smash the TV with a tire iron too.
Follow these pointers to the letter to make sure your kids stay safe!
NOT SATIRE: A message from PragerU Kids- trusted children’s books and videos that entertain and share your values.
At PragerU Kids, we understand how difficult it has become to find trustworthy entertainment for families. Leftist ideologies have infiltrated every aspect of our children’s lives including toy aisles and bookstores.
That is why PragerU Kids created our very own children’s book series: Otto’s Tales.
In the spirit of Christmas, we wanted to give you the opportunity to win a free copy of an Otto’s Tales children’s book of your choice! Click here to enter to win!
PragerU Kids’ books are your solution for values-based Christmas gifts! Created for K-2nd grade readers, the Otto’s Tales storybook series is a fun, meaningful, and easy way to bring your family closer together, while passing on the values, history, and traditions that unite us all as Americans.
BABYLON BEENOW…LET’S COMPARE OUR OBVIOUS POLITICAL PARODIES WITH THIS ACTUAL WASHINGTON POST REPORTGannett ordered our local Morning Fishwrap to roll back op-eds after “repelling readers” with biased articles
• Readers didn’t want to be told what to do or how to think
• They were perceived as having a ‘biased agenda’ so Readers were canceling subscriptions
• The company is decreasing its editorial output and even scaling back cartoons
• The newspapers will no longer make political endorsements beyond a local level, like when The Fishwrap endorsed Crooked Hillary For President. Can You Tell If This Is The Real Story?
THE US NATIONAL DEBT
And Today Everybody Hereabouts Is Wondering Where Trump’s Next Packed 2024 Election Rally Will Be And Clicks On “Get Tickets Here” And Winds Up On The Trumpster’s Official Campaign Fundraising Website
The Whistleblower Newswire Is Your Official Publication of Record For The Conservative Agenda
The Blower believes we’re still living during the most important period in American History for our non-stop crusade for Election Integrity and against Coordinated Leftist Insurrection and the Devolution of Our American Culture while Congress, the Deep State, and the Radical Media Establishment continue to lie to advance their Coordinated Leftist Agenda.
But first, we must see a Corleone Political Reckoning on Election Integrity Along With Indictments And Perp Walks For Laws Broken During The Illegal 2020 Presidential Election, without which nothing else really matters.
Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane Says The Conservative Agenda is watching to see if any progress is made during the next 704 days before the 2024 elections.