SUNDAY, APRIL 30, 2017
HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says today is “Honesty Day” for those of us who are utterly sick of the complete lack of honesty that exists in the Mainstream Media today.
NO WONDER OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE chose this joke from Bob Woodward, left, with Carl Bernstein at last night’s Disingenuous DemocRAT White House Correspondents Association Dinner in Washington that Trump and his staff were boycotting to protest their Dishonest Media Coverage, telling Trump “We’re Not Fake News.” No wonder Trump called out Media Dishonesty on CBS’s “Deface the Nation” today.
FECKLESS FISHWRAPPERS say it’s really hard to be “Honest” when you have to be so willfully biased pushing the Liberal Agenda.
NOW HERE’S THE LATEST FROM BUNKY TADWELL (OUR ODIOUS OCTEGENARIAN), THE BARD OF CLEVES: Just in time for the warm spring weather, we found this in his “Tulips and Trollops,” found in better bookstores everywhere, except in Cleves.
“It Might As Well Be Spring Fever”
I’m glad that Spring is finally here
It brings some warmer breezes
But it also brings more allergies
With water eyes and sneezes
IN THIS WEEK’S COLUMN FROM PATRONAGE COUNTY TITLED “RACINO RIFF RAFF,” we learned how after seeing all that great free publicity Anderson Township Trustees got for themselves at last year’s night’s opening of Belterra’s “Racino” in Anderson Township, our three publicity starved Commissioners from Patronage County were discussing how soon they could get one of those Money Making Gambling Emporiums for themselves on the ride home. This op-ed column never appeared at any time in the feisty Mt. Washington Press personally edited by eminently renowned publisher Dennis Nichols.
THE LATEST POLLS: Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says few DemocRATS are pleased with their own party’s attempts to oppose Donald Trump in his first 100 days as president. A new Rasmussen Reports national telephone and online survey finds that just 11% of Likely DemocRAT Voters believe efforts by the DemocRATS to oppose Trump during his first 100 days in office were successful. (MORE)
THIS WEEK, OUR LATE NIGHT TV JOKEWATCHER SAID LATE NIGHT COMEDIANS WERE STILL MAKING SOME REALLY LAME TRUMP JOKES THESE DAYS, LIKE JIMMY FALLON’S: The White House invited reporters to bring their kids with them this morning for Take Your Kids to Work Day. Or as Trump calls it, every day.
JAMES CORDEN: In case you weren’t aware, today was Take Your Child to Work Day. It’s a great way to see why Mommy and Daddy drink so much. Although at the White House, every day is take Your Child to Work Day, for your children and your son-in-law.
SETH MEYERS: According to a new CNN poll, 44 percent of Americans approve of the job President Trump is doing as he approaches his 100th day in office. While the other 56 percent said, “It’s only been 100 days?!”
MEANWHILE, OUR MUCKRAKER says if you look around the United States at the various “loser” cities and notice they mostly all have one thing in common – they are run by DemocRATS (Liberals). Maybe that’s why only three D-RATS (John Cranley, Rob Richardson, and Yvette Simpson) are running in Tuesday’s so-called non-partisan Mayoral Primary in Cincinnati.
THE SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL
Although our campaign is not associated with the Failed United Way, your liberal guilt giving throughout the year still makes it all possible.
SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL HOT LINE
e-mail your stories about worthy waifs today.
LIBERAL LUNACY: In Human Events’ “365 Ways to Drive a Liberal Crazy,” #57 says you should campaign on behalf of American blacks for reparations from the wicked West African country of Ghana. After all, it was the native black Ashanti kings who were the middle men for the African slave trade.
JOHN GALT says “Happiness is possible only to a rational man, the man who desires nothing but rational goals, seek nothing but rational values and finds his joy in nothing bu rational actions. “
WHISTLEBLOWER SENIOR BUSINESS EDITOR MERRILL FORBES says the House passed numerous bills, including legislation to apply the Freedom of Information Act to Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac while they are under government conservatorship. The Senate approved Sonny Perdue to serve as Agriculture Secretary and Alexander Acosta as Labor Secretary. Both chambers passed today a measure to provide funding for government agencies and operations through May 5.
Next Week: Both chambers will focus on passing legislation to provide government funding through October 1, thereby averting a government shutdown.
THE FREE GRAIN PARTY still stands as the last refuge of anyone who’s willing to help himself from the stores of others.
Free Grain Party Members include all DemocRATS, RINO Republicans, some TEA Partiers, quite a few Independents, disgruntled postal workers, senior citizens demanding free prescriptions, those who believe bigger government is the answer to all their problems, everybody who said “what Bill Clinton did was indefensible, but he shouldn’t be removed from office,” and those who think pork-barrel spending is OK as long as their district gets the money.
Unfortunately, that group probably doesn’t include all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters Who Put The Positively Worst President in History In The White House—Twice, and Failed Trying To Give Obama a Third Term By Voting For Hillary, and get all of their “fake news” from our Obama Supporters in the Press, like the ones at The Fishwrap and on Channel 5, 9, 12, and 19.
FINALLY AT TONIGHT’S MEETING OF THE CONSERVATIVE AGENDA, Political Insiders were asking our Beloved Publisher Charles Foster Kane if The Blower expects to win the prestigious UNESCO/Guillermo Cano World Press Freedom Prize on Wednesday’s World Press Freedom Day. “I’d be really shocked if we didn’t,” Kane said, “especially because The Blower has made so major contributions towards journalistic freedom.”
Remember: We never print all the bad stuff we know and certain people ought to be damn glad we don’t, especially John Kasich, whose book about “Pigging Out In Politics” contains many embarrassing pictures from Ohio’s Delusional Governor’s ridiculous presidential campaign last year.
AND COMING UP IN “THE WEEK THAT WILL BE”:
MONDAY (MAY 1) we’ll be trying to decide whether to call it “Trump’s Second Hundred Days” or Trump’s First Hundred Days—Part Deux.”
TUESDAY (MAY 2) we’ll be checking to see who won all those elections on Hamilton County’s Primary Election Day, and our “Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers” will try to ignore Cincinnati’s Meaningless Mayoral Election, where only three Disingenuous DemocRATS are running.
WEDNESDAY (MAY 3), we’ll be waiting to see if we win the prestigious UNESCO/Guillermo Cano World Press Freedom Prize on Wednesday’s World Press Freedom Day
THURSDAY (MAY 4) we’ll be getting to celebrate Cinco de Mayo on Friday and promoting Amnesty for Criminal Immigrants in Cincinnati’s Sanctuary City.
THE FIRST LINE OF FRIDAY’S (MAY 5 LIMERICK IS “Here’s how to have fun on Cinco de Mayo.”
AND SATURDAY (May 6) we’ll be hoping to watch the government being shut down.
Plagiarism Count: Unattributed material was filched from a mere 742 different websites for the production of today’s Blower, many of our filches were from our friends at Weasel Zippers.
WEEK IN REVIEW HOT LINE
e-mail your revolutionary recaps today
Some political score-keeping items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally political score-keeping subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more.
A Good Video Deserves Repeating
Current Whistleblower Policies and Disclaimers can be found here
The Whistleblower has always been 100% commercial free, unlike members of the mendacious news media. So if you want to buy an ad on the front page, call The Fishwrap.
