SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 7, 2015

Active Student Stabber Seminars Now Being Offered

In response to all those Student Stabbing Incidents all over America these days, the Department of Public Safety at Dumbed-Down University is hosting a number of Active Student Stabber seminars to educate faculty, staff, and students about how to prepare and deal with an active student stabber situation.

In many cases, there is no pattern or method to the selection of victims by an active student shooter, and these situations are unpredictable and evolve quickly. President Obama’s calls for more knife control laws have as yet gone unheeded. And we all know, an active student stabber can start stabbing anytime, anywhere, even in a no-student-stabbing zone or in a multi-sex student restroom.

Participants will learn about appropriate response actions and develop the skills and mindset necessary to successfully respond to an active student stabber threat. Additionally, attendees will be advised of the communication tools Public Safety will use to alert members of the Dumbed-Down University Community if an active student stabber emergency occurs.

All students, faculty, and staff are encouraged to attend Monday’s seminar at the Student Union. Dates, times, and locations of future Active Student Stabber Seminars listed below.  Each seminar will last approximately one hour.

In addition, Dumbed-Down University is now offering

Active Student Stabbing Resources for Law Enforcement and Trainers

An Active Student Stabber Prevention Course

An Active Student Stabber Webinar

An Active Student Stabber Workshop Series

And Active Student Stabber “How to Respond Resource” Materials

NOTE: Backstabbing on Facebook is not included.