THURSDAY, OCTOBER 29, 2015 

What’s There to Celebrate Anyway?

         Republicans were all high-fivin’ each other all over America Tuesday night congratulating themselves over all they historic victories at the polls, with the exception of Anderson Township where long-time Anderson Township Trustee President “In Russ We Trust” Jackson was not reelected, and will now be replaced by a Dishonest Disguised Obama Liberal DemocRAT who told a lot of lies about her opponent and successfully convinced a lot of dumbed-down voters that she was really “non-partisan.”

Hurley the Historian says on tomorrow’s date in 1944, FDR won an unprecedented fourth term, and the next 1,460 Days until November 5, 2019 will seem like eternity at the Anderson Government Center, because that’s the soonest Asleep Andersonians can undo the damage they’ve done.

Will the Conservative Agenda be investigating the problem, defining the problem, and working on ways to fix the problem? You Bet! As the official publication for all that scrambling, speculation, mud-slinging, and back-stabbing in the tri-state, our readers have every right to expect nothing less. 

 Now Let’s Meet Today’s Guest Editor:

         It’s Anderson Township Trustee President “In Russ We Trust” Jackson who learned too late how a lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes, especially on Facebook these days, especially after the Forrest Gump School Board took another seat from the trustees. If only all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Voters Who Put Obama In The White House—Twice, had been paying attention. 1,460 days does seem like a very long time.

That’s why The Blower, which takes pride in recognizing Real American Conservatives, is pleased to permit The Russler, as our guest editor to choose choose three items plus a quickie for today’s E-dition from our Current Cadre of Conservative Columnists and Contributors.

WHY VETERANS SHOULD NEVER HAVE VOTED FOR OBAMA By PFC Kadon

         June 6, 2014 was the 69th anniversary of “D Day,” and everybody was wondering when Obama flew in for just another photo op at Normandy, attempting to divert attention from all of his other military-related scandals, if Obama Supporters in the Press would ask our Incompetent-in-Chief how illegally trading those five murdering Terrorist Four-Star Taliban Generals for a known traitor like Sergeant Bowe Bergdahl was working out for him. The latest Fox News Poll said only 84% worry prisoner swap puts US soldiers at risk.

As usual, TEA Party Patriots were calling for Obama to be impeached. But Retired U.S. Army Lt. Gen. William “Jerry” Boykin said Sgt. Bowe Bergdahl was  clearly a deserter who should never draw a free breath, and Obama was guilty of high crimes and misdemeanors for once again ignoring federal law in pursuit of an administration goal. RINO Senator Lindsay Graham even threatened to start using the “I-Word,” but only if Obama ever did it again.

On Fox News, Judge Andrew Napolitano asked Can President Obama faithfully enforce the laws? “The president has a serious problem with competence and with fidelity to his oath. In one week, he has alienated and demoralized much of the intelligence community by revealing the true name of one of them and by releasing their worst nightmare back into the theater of Middle East warfare. He has, as well, flagrantly failed to enforce federal law by materially aiding a non-state terrorist group condemned by American law. This is almost inconceivable in an American president.”

In Congress, Disingenuous DemocRAT Ohio Senator Sherrod Brown said, “Obama made the right decision.”  But Republicans weren’t much better: Senator Portman said, “Obama’s swap set a bad precedent.” Congressman Chabot said, “This puts a price on our men and women serving overseas.” Wenstrup favored a rescue mission. Boehner called for more meaningless hearings. Kentucky’s Congressman Massie mumbled about Obama not really having the authority to make the swap. Senator McConnell blathered about making sure those five murdering terrorists Obama let loose don’t kill and more Americans. Surprisingly, Senator Rand Paul actually called Sgt. Bergdahl a ‘deserter.”

But Keith Maupin, father of a Clermont County soldier who was kidnapped by Iraqi insurgents and later killed said Obama’s swap was “a bad deal,” sending the message that the U.S. “is willing to make trades with terrorists.” Maupin said he never would have agreed to a trade for his own son, had such a deal been proposed.

VETERANS, NEXT WEDNESDAY IS VETERANS DAY SO PLEASE FORWARD THIS TO YOUR VETERAN FRIENDS AND CONTACTS

FUN WITH GUNS By Billy Bob Carbine, Bluegrass Rifle Association Spokesman

Today we have some shooting advice from various Concealed Carry Instructors. If you own a gun, you will appreciate this. If not, you should go out and get one and learn how to shoot it. 

Guns have only two enemies: rust and politicians.

It’s always better to be judged by 12 than carried by 6.

Cops carry guns to protect themselves, not you.

Never let someone or something that threatens you get inside arms length.

Never say “I’ve got a gun.” If you need to use deadly force, the first sound they hear should be the safety clicking off. UNLESS you carry an XD, in which case the safeties make no sound and the first sound heard will be “bang.”

The average response time of a 911 call is 23 minutes, the response time of a .357 is 1400 feet per second.

The most important rule in a gunfight is: Always win – cheat if necessary.

Make your attacker advance through a wall of bullets . . . You may get killed with your own gun, but he’ll have to beat you to death with it, cause it’ll be empty.

If you’re in a gun fight:
If you’re not shooting, you should be loading.
If you’re not loading, you should be moving,
If you’re not moving, you’re dead.

In a life and death situation, do something. It may be wrong, but do something!

If you carry a gun, people call you paranoid. Nonsense! If you have a gun, what do you have to be paranoid about?

You can say “stop” or “alto” or any other word, but a large bore muzzle pointed at someone’s head is pretty much a universal language.

You cannot save the planet, but you may be able to save yourself and your family, or a defenseless innocent.

IF YOU BELIEVE IN THE SECOND AMENDMENT, PLEASE FORWARD THIS TO YOUR FRIENDS.

TODAY’S DIVERSITY LESSON By TEA Party Tim

          The Obama Administration wants us to learn more about Muslims, their ‘Religion of Peace’, their significant and numerous contributions to the culture of the world we share and to accept them into our American culture.  So, I’m making a sincere effort to learn to communicate with our Muslim friends by learning Arabic for the sake of “cultural diversity.”

Arabic is a difficult language to master. This is my first attempt at it but it is a heartfelt message: 

 AND A QUICKIE sent in by By Our Good Friend Bobby Leach   

We all remember when Nancy Pelosi issued that famous phrase about ObamaCare:

“We have to pass it, to find out what’s in it”

A perceptive physician called into a radio show and responded:

“Actually, that’s the definition of a stool sample.”

 Today’s Really Stupid Statements Award

 The Federalist reported Doofus DemocRAT Kentucky House Speaker Greg Stumbo gave a strange speech after TEA Party Republican Matt Bevin’s Big Win in the Bluegrass Governor’s race Tuesday night, when he discussed his thoughts on the political affiliation of Jesus and his view on what Scripture really is and how it influences politics. Stumbo Stumbled: “And the other thing I know is that if in fact the Bible is a book of parables, like I believe it is, think about this: Mary did not ride an elephant into Bethlehem that night.” His mangled syntax reaches a climax at the end when he makes an allusion to Hillary Clinton: “I believe there’s a horse out there. Not American Pharoah. It’s an Arkansas Traveler. And that horse is bringing a lady jockey and that horse and that jockey are going to come to Kentucky next year and help us rebuild this party,” Stumbo said.

Stories We’re Working On

HILLARY’S Smoking Gun
CARSON admits fabricating West Point scholarship
SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE On High Alert for Trump Appearance
BENGALS Predict 16-0 Season
FREE BLOOMIN’ ONIONS For Veterans Day
DRUG TRAFFICKING in Northern Kentucky
$TAN CHE$LEY Will Avoid CVG

Whistleblower Web Poll

        This week, here’s why the first 17,648 Whistleblower Readers Poll respondents said Republicans seem to do much better in this year’s Local Elections:

(A) Not Nearly Enough Days of Early Voting: 2%
(B) Not enough Black Candidates on the ballot: 1%
(C) Republican Voter Suppression Really Worked: 1%
(D) Hamilton County Demo-Labor Party Boss Tim Burka’s Endorsements Really Sucked: 96%

Note: Everything we write doesn’t have to be so damn cynical and mean-spirited, it’s just so much more fun that way!

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