TUESDAY, OCTOBER 13, 2015

If You Must Watch, At least You Should Know What To Expect

At this afternoon’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda, Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane what to expect from watching tonight’s CNN infomercial for the DemocRAT National Committee. “One thing you probably won’t hear is a single word of the truth at tonight’s first 2016 DemocRAT Presidential Debacle in Las Vegas,” Kane explained. Plus, CNN probably won’t need that podium for Joe Biden they brought in just in case.

The Weekly Standard says CNN host Anderson Cooper, who is set to moderate tonight’s DemocRAT debacle, was listed as a “notable past member” the Clinton Global Initiative’s website along with a number of other big name journalists: The list includes: CNN’s Anderson Cooper and Christiane Amanpour, Fox’s Greta Van Susteren, NBC’s Matt Lauer and Tom Brokaw, New York Times’ Thomas Friedman and Nicholas Kristof, Fox Business Network’s Maria Bartiromo, Yahoo’s Katie Couric, The Economist‘s Matthew Bishop, and Financial Times‘ Lionel Barber. The Clinton Foundation later told Mediaite that none of these journalists were asked to pay the $20,000 membership fee required of members. However, it’s safe to say that access to big name journalists was a key selling point for paying Clinton Global Initiative members. In a nutshell, Anderson Cooper helped Hillary Clinton raise money, and now he’s presented as an impartial moderator for tonight’s debacle.

Political Analyst Dick Morris says the first DemocRAT presidential debacle will not be kind to Hillary, likely boosting each of the candidates who participate — largely at the expense of Hillary Clinton.

The debacle will be a contest of four vs. one, since not only Senator Bernie Sanders, but also former Maryland Governor Martin O’Malley, former Rhode Island Senator Lincoln Chaffee, and former Virginia Senator Jim Webb gang up on her.

But, beyond the actual content of the debacle, the fact that these alternatives to Hillary — particularly Bernie Sanders — have a chance to showcase themselves in front of a DemocRAT audience that does not yet know them well, will inevitably trigger a rise in their standings.

Hillary, in particular, will suffer from attacks on her very recent flip flops on the Keystone Pipeline and the Pacific Rim Trade Agreement. At the State Department, she approved Keystone and sent it to the White House for a final ruling. And, at the State Department, Hillary had a formative role in the early stages of negotiating the trade deal she now opposes.

Bernie Sanders, unlike Hillary, stands for something and does so with consistency and tenacity. He is staking out a vibrant left wing agenda for America which will be on display at the DemocRAT debacle.

Does Social Security face financial problems? Bernie says take the cap off FICA taxes and tax the full income of rich and middle class people and use the extra money to lower the retirement age to help people facing layoffs in the late 50s or early 60s.

Dissatisfied with ObamaCare premium increases? Bernie says socialize medicine and cut out the insurance companies altogether.

Worried about job losses to foreign trade? Sanders opposes all trade deals and wants to protect American jobs by trade restrictions on currency manipulation.

         Poverty? Bernie says raise the minimum wage to $15. Immediately.

The DemocRAT audience will lap it up. As Sanders hits Hillary high — taking on her issue positions — her other competitors, particularly Lincoln Chaffee, will likely hit her low — taking on her email scandal and her lies and obfuscations.

Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says DemocRAT Voters are already predicting a victory for Hillary.

A Last minute e-mail from Hillary says, 

Friend —

In a few hours, I’ll be on the debacle stage telling millions of people about our ideas for how to make all of our futures brighter.

Before I step up to the podium, it would mean a lot to know you have my back. Will you chip in $1 to become a Debacle Donor?

I know that if we stand together, we can make this a great moment for our team. Become a Debacle Donor now, and let’s show everyone watching just how strong we are:

Republican Satirist Greg Gutfeld says Hillary will initially laugh like a drunken fairground harlequin. But it will be followed by an awkward silence, then she will address the moderator with a canned statement, and the world yawns. It won’t work, for anyone. Hillary will call the email scandal a mistake, but a moderator should then wisely point out that a mistake is not intentional, and what she did was intentional. You don’t create an entire server by accident. If that was a mistake, so was the moon landing. “Well, funny thing is, we were planning to go to Miami – and we ended up on the moon.”  That’s essentially what she’s saying. She will drop at least another 7 to 8 points after the debacle. Unless she finds her inner a-hole and gets aggressive. It’s pointless for HRC to be gentle – no one buys it. Trump can’t be modest, so he doesn’t bother. He was born to play an arrogant confident alpha male. HRC should follow suit, and just be a pissed off bruiser. If she doesn’t, she’s toast. Either she wows, or gets walloped.

Lincoln Chaffee will make a lame joke about the metric system and everyone will wonder at home, who is this weird guy and how did he get on the dais, which is a fancy word for stage. 

Bernie Sanders will go after Hillary on her trade flip flop, and it will hurt her. Hillary will make the point that once she was for the deal, but since then the deal has changed over time, she’s now uncomfortable with it.  She’d say anything to get elected, and will prove it at least 13 times tonight. No one will buy it… even her.

The public will turn it off after the first hour. Having suckled at the Republican extravaganza (featuring the human cannonball, Donald Trump), all of America will find this debacle to be slow, vacuous, and verging on comatose. This will only help Trump.  The only exception would be if….

Webb pulls a Trump and completely tears into his competitors, specifically on national security. Webb, once Assistant Secretary of Defense for Reserve Affairs, served in Vietnam. Sure, he included some seriously weird sex scenes in his fiction books, but so what. At least they weren’t in his nonfiction books. He’s the guy who can pointedly square off against Hillary for her lapse in judgment, and how that lapse sacrificed our nation’s security. My prediction: he’ll be at 9% by Friday, shaving points off Hillary.

Finally, The Blower predicts the real winner of tonight’s DemocRAT Debacle will be Billionaire Republican Presidential Front-Runner Donald Trump, who is already thrilling political junkies by announcing his plans to live-tweet during CNN’s DemocRAT Presidential TV Infomercial tonight. The Blower predicts tonight’s Dodger’s-Mets game at 8 PM will outdraw the DemocRAT Debacle on CNN, especially if all those New York and LA fans can get The Donald’s Tweets while they’re watching the games.