THURSDAY, AUGUST 6, 2015
County Communities in Crisis
Our Colerain Confidante (probably not anyone related to the Dumpy Rumpkes) says that Goofball Greg Insco’s scampaign for Colerain Dis-Trustee got off to its usual sideshow self this week.
Inscum still has his Underoos in a wad ever since the trustees cut his summer camp program, which was the failed reality show contestant’s primary source of income. Now that he is the proud part-owner of a part-time Zumba studio, Inscum is impersonating a Republican with t-shirts (most in XXXL for his Zumba clients to wear) proclaiming “Republicans Vote Insco!”
Inscum’s left-wing Faux Facebook Friend “Trent Tenney” started an online campaign to find a running mate for his fellow Colerain Cardinal to run against the incumbent Fecal Officer. “Trent” spent two weeks adding 700 or so food service workers, retail clerks, and black-haired nose-ringed aspiring strippers to his “Give Heather Harlow the Heave-Ho!” group, none of whom filed to run against her. The Blower wonders if any of these ladies sent “Trent” any nude selfies to make it worth his time and trouble.
Inscum went to the trustee meeting Tuesday night to complain about township employees moving his personal property that he’s kept in the park for a number of years in retaliation for his threatening campaign where he came in 5th in a 4-man race in 2013. He is publicly accusing administrator Jim Rowan of theft, claiming he has receipts to prove it! Ordinarily, spending WITHOUT receipts is a sign of theft in office.
Inscum binge-watched House of Cards during the vast amount of free time his underemployed millennial self has and now he sounds like everyone’s geriatric Uncle Ray who sits around all day watching Fox News. Insco is only 30, so the good people of Colerain Township only have to put up with his lunacy for another 50-60 years.
MEANWHILE, ANXIOUS IN ANDERSON says everybody is apprehensively awaiting to see how many prospective school board candidates actually turned in their petitions at the Hamilton County Board of Elections this week to run for the two spots on the Forrest Gump School District that need replacing because of the part Board Members Randy Smith and Jim Frooman played in “Smiling Dallas Jackson’s Tax Hike Scam Debacle.
All the interest is focused on the Beech Acres situation. The public is pressuring the park district hard to cooperate with the township and school district in building a new Anderson High School on the Beech Acres property instead of expanding the park. The park board might have to go with the flow or lose their levy plus any political capital they might have built up.
All the interest focused elsewhere reminds one of an old joke: Newlyweds are in their hotel room on their wedding night preparing for lovemaking. They decide that since it is their first time, maybe it would be a good idea to get a running start at it. So they get undressed and the guy gets by the door with his wife on the opposite side of the room. He flips off the light and they take off. In the dark, they miss each other. He goes flying out the balcony door, over the rail, and into the pool. He’s now treading water trying to figure out how to get back the the room. Fortunately, someone comes running by. He says, “Hey! Can you get me a towel so I can cover up and get back to my room?” “Don’t worry about it, buddy. Nobody is going to see you. All the excitement is upstairs. Some lady is stuck on a doorknob!” (Hmmm. Is that a Ken Kushner/park board metaphor?)
