Friday, August 9, 2013
From the Very Beginning
- At yesterday’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda, Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane said he is never surprised when Political Insiders ask about The Blower’s latest exclusive report, but Kane was surprised, however, when one of our more recent Political Insiders in attendance asked about the first time our Beloved Whistleblower Publisher “Blew the Whistle” on a really deserving public official.
- Hurley the Historian was ready with a full report, because every day since November 4, 1992, The Whistleblower Newswire has been turning over rocks and shining the light of truth underneath so you could see the vermin squirming.
- Unlike today, Kane used to get a lot of well-deserved coverage in the local press for his Marvelous Muckraking. Our Beloved Whistleblower Publisher was even asked to present the Annual Whistleblower Professional Journalism Awards to members of the Queen City Chapter of the Society of Professional Journalists at that group’s August 15, 1991 meeting.
- But that actually wasn’t the beginning. A decade before that, when Ronald Reagan was running for president, Kane did media advance work for The Gipper during the early primaries. Later on that year, Kane exposed then-GOP Hamilton County Commissioner Norman Murdock for operating an illegal Republican group out of the courthouse.
- Thirty-three years ago tomorrow, a picture of the check from Stormin’ Norman’s “Committee to Elect Republicans” bearing the Hamilton County Courthouse address of “1000 Main Street” on the front-page of the Sunday paper on August 10, 1980, and legendary political reporter Bob Weston’s award-winning expose (“Republican Group Alleged to Work from County Office”) was just the beginning.
- Later that year as the Murdock scandal fomented, Jim Borgman piled on by publishing some Pulitzer-Prize-winning editorial cartoons lampooning Murdock, like that classic one showing the disgraced Commissioner as a sleazy used car salesman with the caption asking, “Hey, have I ever given you a reason to doubt me?”
- Kane followed with weekly satirical op-ed pieces for several years in the very Conservative, then very much respected Mt. Washington Press, detailing the goings-on in the mythical “Patronage County,” where Commissioners Pilfer, Filch, and Swindle held sway. You’ll never guess how many people thought “Stormin’ Norman” was Commissioner Swindle.
No wonder Murdock’s wet dreams of being Ohio’s governor evaporated.
- Finally, another one of the Political Insiders asked Kane why he enjoyed “Muckraking” and ruining the careers of courthouse crooks and cronies for all those years.
And the Chairman of our Quote for Today Committee said that reminded him of the story about the prison warden who was retiring, and a reporter asked how he felt about holding the record for executions, and the warden said, “I guess I just like working with people.”
REMEMBER: If you can’t improve on the news, you shouldn’t even be reporting it.
Stories We’re Working On
Obama vows US will never retreat after flight from Yemen- DHS Grants Temporary Asylum To Illegal Aliens To Join An Amnesty Protest
- DemocRATS Issued Talking Points Advocating Using Trayvon Martin’s Death
- Bill Clinton Endorsed Filthy Filner For San Diego Mayor In 2012
- Pentagon May Grant Gay Troops Special 10-Day Leave to Marry
- Chick-Fil-A Opens in Newport
- Reds Still in Third Place, Six-and-a-Half Games Out
Whistleblower Web Poll
This week, here’s what the first 17,648 Whistleblower Readers Poll respondents said was the best advice to stay cool during a summer heat wave in Greater Cincinnati:
(A) Drink plenty of liquids: 2%
(B) Turn your air-conditioner all the way up: 1%
(C) Don’t over exert yourself: 1%
(D) Work naked at your computer: 96%
Some of Today’s Conservative Political Cartoons
Not Really “Debates”
This week, everybody who thinks those so-called “Candidate Debates” are nothing more than Joint Press Conference with Partisan Panelists, e-mailed an entry to the Whistleblower Limerick Contest.
The winner is Well-Known Master Debater Loquacious Tadwell, who says the candidates’ responses are usually nothing more than memorized talking points.
Loquacious wins front-row seats to that yet-to-be-scheduled debate before the September 10 Cincinnati Mayoral Primary between Loony Libertarian Jim Berns and Queen Nobel to see who won’t be invited to attend the equally meaningless Cincinnati USA Regional Chamber’s “debate” between Disguised DemocRAT John Cranley and Extremely Liberal DemocRAT Foxy Roxy Qualls after the primary. His winning entry is:
With only two people at a debate
You know it will be second-rate
An audience so small
Will not fill the hall
To hear both candidates misstate.
And from the Anderson Laureate (who’s wondering when the League of Women Vipers will be scheduling a candidates forum featuring the Two Endorsed Township Trustee Republican Candidates Josh Gerth and Andy Pappas):
With only two people at a debate
Lincoln and Douglas turned out just great
But at a “candidate forum”
They must call a quorum
And not a single vote will be changed on that date.
The first line of next week’s limerick is: “How many lies will Obama tell?”
MEANINGLESS PRIMARIES HOT LINE
e-mail your competition cutoffs today.
Some undemocratic items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally undemocratic subscribers, but we could always use more.
Whistleblower Link of the Day
Why Doesn’t Cincinnati Get One of These?
Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.
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