One of the best parts about publishing The Whistleblower Newswire is checking our e-mail first thing each morning to see some of those politically insightful items we’ve received from our equally politically insightful subscribers. Our readers’ comments are extremely helpful for our analysis and interpretation of today’s important top stories.
Wednesday, August 7, 2013
Obama Tells America to Stay Strong
NOT ALL OF OUR EMBASSIES ARE CLOSED: On Tuesday’s anniversary of the bombing of Hiroshima, Japan unveiled its largest warship since WWII, Obama couldn’t bomb Japan since they’re now one of our few remaining allies, so Obama bombed a few Muslim terrorists in Yemen while U.S. Embassies in the Middle East remained closed, due to all those serious and specific dangers from Al Qaeda, which despite Obama’s claims to the contrary, still appears to be in business.
The Blower remembers way back in February 2011 during the presidential primaries when Minnesota Congresswoman Michele Bachmann launched a verbal assault on Obama, claiming that his foreign policy stance was so weak that it made “Jimmy Carter look like a Rambo tough-guy.” Now all those all of those Dumb Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters have a Commander-in-Chief they truly deserve. Unfortunately, so do the rest of us.
- IN A RELATED ITEM: A study of gags by late-night comics during the first half of the year found an abrupt change from 2012. Now Obama and Democrats are providing the lion’s share of punch lines. Obama was the target of 288 monologue jokes made by Jay Leno, David Letterman, Jimmy Fallon, Craig Ferguson and Jimmy Kimmel, according to an analysis released Monday by the Center for Media and Public Affairs at George Mason University. The next most joked-about individual was New York City Democratic mayoral candidate Anthony Weiner, at 120. His numbers are likely to jump fast, since the study period was before the second round of Weiner’s sexting scandal.
In 2012, Mitt Romney was the butt of more than twice as many jokes as Obama, and Republicans were similarly the target of more than double the jokes that were made on DemocRATS.
But the findings don’t illustrate any “political change of heart” among late-night comics. The jokes follow the news, and with Republicans receding after an election campaign, Obama has presented more opportunities.
- OUR LATE NIGHT TV JOKEWATCHER says wouldn’t it be funny if the first question Obama might actually take on his Murdering Muslim Middle East Mess might not come from a reporter, but a comedian, last night when he appeared on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno?
EMPTY THREATS: Yesterday The Blower reported Republican National Committee Chairman Reince Priebus’ threat that if NBC and CNN have not agreed to pull their plans to air films promoting Hillary Clinton for president in 2016 prior to the start of the RNC’s Summer Meeting on August 14, he will seek a binding vote stating that the RNC will neither partner with these networks in 2016 primary debates nor sanction primary debates they sponsor.
But The Blower remembers last year at this time when Obama’s Dirtiest Campaign in History was right on track, and there only “82” more days until the 2012 Elections, the Republican Establishment said it was OK for the Liberal Dream Team (Jim Lehrer of PBS, Bob Schieffer of CBS, and Candy Crowley of CNN) to host those so-called “Presidential Debates.” And just how biased did those people turn out to be?
- STILL SUCKING UP: So what did John Boehner buy for Obama when the president turned 52 on Sunday? The GOP House Speaker sent “A little taste of his hometown” that included Montgomery Inn ribs, Montgomery Inn BBQ Sauce, and Graeter’s Black Raspberry Chip ice cream. The Blower says Boehner should stop trying to suck up to a man he should be trying to impeach. Boehner should have issued a subpoena!
- CH SNITCH AT 1000 MAIN STREET says The Blower was weeks ahead on one aspect of The Fishwrap’s puff piece editorial about Sheriff Jimmy, when we reported the Hamilton County Sheriff’s Department millions of dollars over budget. CH also claims Neil is a professional law enforcement officer — not a political hack. He and his team get it. They’re not patronage job leeches. For the first time in a quarter century, career law enforcement people are running that office, not Republican Party hacks, and it’s only taking millions of extra over-taxed payers’ dollars to do it. Happy Days Are Here Again!
DEMOCRAT FAMILY VALUES: And you really have to hand it to those Liberals for “Class,” especially with their “Virgin Mary Should’ve Been Aborted” Facebook Page receiving more than 5,000 “Likes.” These same people would scream bloody murder over a Facebook page denigrating the “prophet” Mohammed, especially during this holy month of Rama-Lama-Ding-Dong!- CELEBRITY LAWSUITS: Former DJ Pat Barry says he was fired from WMOJ-FM (MOJO 100.3) last October after being accused of “corporate espionage” for forwarding a station email to long-time friend Randy Michaels. Using his real name of Barry Tingley, he sued Radio One and Blue Chip Broadcasting Monday in Hamilton County Common Pleas Court saying “I no longer feel Tingley all over.”
- THE LATEST POLLS: 74% say they rarely or never use Mass Transit but they still tend to believe the government should back mass transit projects as long as they don’t lose money. In Greater Cincinnati, that percentage is way too low, Trolley Folly Fans!
MAYORAL MADNESS: Loony Libertarian Jim Berns, who is probably running the most outrageous mayoral campaign in Cincinnati history, claims there’s an ongoing conspiracy at The Fishwrap to sabotage the Berns for Mayor Campaign, like using a goofy looking picture of him instead of his official campaign picture last Sunday. In the past, our Feckless Fishwrappers have left him out of articles, even when he was the only candidate officially on the ballot, mentioning only Disguised DemocRAT John Cranley and Extremely Liberal DemocRAT Foxy Roxy Qualls. They’ve given Cranley and Qualls front page stories while not printing any story about Berns’ campaign at all, and blamed Berns for the $400,000 cost of the Mayoral Primary, even though he was the first candidate to file. Now they’re digging way back on the Internet to find an unflattering photo of him to put in the Sunday Paper. Berns, who has been endorsed by COAST, the Queen City TEA Party, and Willie Nelson’s Tea Pot Party, now demands a front-page story in The Fishwrap about his campaign and an end to the Feckless Fishwrappers’ conspiracy to discredit, ignore, and sabotage his campaign for Mayor of Cincinnati.- MEANWHILE IN ANDERSON TOWNSHIP: Republican Party Endorsed Township Trustee Candidates Josh Gerth and Andy Pappas wonder if there isn’t a similar conspiracy against them by Disgraced Masturbating Trustee Kevin O’Brien’s Enablers at The Forest Hills Urinal.
- IN NORTHERN KENTUCKY: Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says everybody’s still talking about that picture of Republican U.S. Senator Bitch McConnell ogling the sexy legs of his opponent last weekend at Fancy Farm. Alison Lundergan Grimes’ Official Whistleblower Nickname will now be Alison Wondergams Grimes.
Last year, Goof Doofus and “BeanBall Jim” Bunning backed Trooper Babe State Rep-tile Alecia Webb-Edgington against Thomas Massie because she had great looking legs, and The Blower says, if Alecia’s “Legs Commercial” had only been on TV a few more times, our Trooper Babe would’ve won by a landslide.
Meanwhile, Ed Marksberry, another DemocRAT running for U.S. Senate, thanked The Blower for running his misic video in yesterday’s e-dition. [WATCH IT HERE]
And Rick “The Bat Boy” Robinson says if his former boss “Beanball Jim” Bunning, the Hall of Fame pitcher who went on to represent Kentucky in the U.S. Senate, were running Major League Baseball, Alex Rodriguez would be benched for life for using performance-enhancing drugs, just like Shoeless Joe Jackson and Pete Rose were kicked out of baseball for gambling.
- CRIMEBUSTERS IN NoKY The CamBoozler also says Monday afternoon a guy in Fort Wright was robbed by a young black man in his 20s wearing baggy shorts when he was getting ready to make a bank deposit from his store in the Fifth-Third Bank parking lot at 1975 Highland Pike. NoKY Crimebusters says whatever you do, be careful making bank deposits and watch out for young black men in their 20s wearing baggy pants and a ski mask.
HURLEY THE HISTORIAN: On this date in 1912, Teddy Roosevelt was nominated for president by a group of Revolting Republicans called the Bull Moose Party. One wonders what our TEA Party Patriots would be calling them today.- THAT’S WHY OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE chose Teddy Roosevelt’s “There is no room in this country for hyphenated Americanism.”
- FINALLY, AT YESTERDAY’S MEETING OF THE CONSERVATIVE AGENDA, Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane about The Fishwrap, “Obamaesque announcement of two new investigative reporters (James Pilcher and Amber Hunt) on the day after the whole world learned about all those other Fired Fishwrappers Skaggie Maggie and Wedgie Washburn didn’t want you to know about.
“It’s like when Obama announces all those wonderful new jobs and 90% turn out to be part-time or low pay with no benefits,” Kane explained. These numbers come as Republicans argue that ObamaCare is pushing businesses to save money and push workers into shorter schedules to avoid the penalties that come from hiring more full-time workers, who under the law will be required to be covered with health care insurance.
Some of Today’s Conservative Political Cartoons
AMERICAN LEADERSHIP HOT LINE
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Some highly critical items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally highly critical subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use more.
BABY&ME / THE NEW EVIAN FILM
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