Your Official Publication of Record For The Conservative Agenda
FRIDAY, JANUARY 12, 2018
Tonight’s Top Conservative News Stories You Won’t See On The Front Page Of Tomorrow’s Fishwrap
(Or On Channels 5, 9, 12, And 19, Either)
— Tonight’s Whistleblower Wisdom —
Yesterday We Saw Just Another WaPo Anti-Trump FAKE NEWS Report
(this one claiming The Trumpster had forgotten to sugar coat the truth one more time and used the word “Shithole” during a private meeting. Oh, the Humanity!
—Tonight’s Top Three Trump Tweets —
— TONIGHT’S BEN GARRISON MOMENT —
TO SEE MORE BEN GARRISON ILLUSTRATIONS, CLICK HERE
— TONIGHT’S PHOTO-SHOP EDITORIAL SPOOF ON CURRENT EVENTS FROM EDWARD CROPPER —
TO SEE MORE PHOTO SHOP EDITORIAL SPOOFS FROM EDWARD CROPPER, CLICK HERE
— Whistleblower NFL Boycott Countdown Continues —
— Tonight’s Whistleblower Faking News —
“All The News That’s Fit To Fake”
— TONIGHT’S REAL NEWS FROM OTHER SATIRICAL WEB SITES —
(Commenting On Today’s Top Stories)
Pussy Hats To Be More Inclusive
WORLD NEWS BUREAU – Feminist activists say they are modifying the famous pink ‘pussy hats’ to not offend transgender or other sexually confused/mentally ill individuals.
Phoebe Hopps, founder and president of Women’s March Michigan, said the movement is changing the symbolic pink knitted hats because they are discriminatory to women who do not have typically female genitalia. “Many of our women today have penises and the addition of knitted meatsticks on the hats provides the inclusivity they deserve.”
Earlier complaints that the ‘pussy hats’ were also ostracizing to women of color were laid to rest after a sampling of those women’s genitals determined that they were, in fact, also pink.
TO SEE MORE BIG HAIRY NEWS, CLICK HERE
TO SEE MORE STORIES FROM THE PEOPLE’S CUBE, CLICK HERE
‘1984’ Moved To Current Affairs Section
TO HEAR MORE BUZZ FROM THE BABYLON BEE, CLICK HERE
New GOP Tax Plan Requires Welfare Recipients To Apply For Each Individual Piece Of Food
WASHINGTON—As part of their effort to rein in government spending through entitlement reform, GOP congressional leaders announced Friday that their new tax plan will require welfare recipients to apply for each individual piece of food they receive. “Mandating that all Americans on food stamps submit a separate… (MORE)
TO SEE MORE STORIES FROM THE ONION, CLICK HERE— Tonight’s Top Three Whistleblower Political Posters —
— HERE’S HOW YOU CAN SUPPORT YOUR FAVORITE FAKE NEWS SITE —
The Whistleblower Newswire Is The Official Publication of Record For The Conservative Agenda
The Blower believes we’re living during the most important period in American History for our non-stop campaign against Political Correctness, the Devolution of American Culture, and the Liberal News Media. Congress and the Liberal Media Establishment will continue to lie and say really stupid things without a smidgen of journalistic integrity in their effort to advance the Liberal Agenda.
Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane Says The Conservative Agenda Is Now Completing Working On Donald Trump’s Third 100 Days To Make America Great Again. Today Is Day Number 359. There Are Now Only 1,025 More Days Until Trump’s Re-election Day on November 3, 2020.
