Tag Archives: The Fishwrap

Special “Weekend Wrap-up” E-dition

Today’s E-dition Has Been Approved To Research The Coordinated Leftist Insurrection During Trump’s First Year In Office

 Tonight’s Coverage Is At The Same Point Of The Trumpster’s First  Year In Office. We’re Reviewing Our “AUGUST 27 E-DITION. ”

It Was It Was Just More Coordinated Leftist Insurrection  

AUGUST 27, 2017
More Politics Unusual

HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says ninety-seven years ago today, the 19th Amendment was certified to guarantee the right to vote for women. Today, we celebrate Women’s Equality Day in honor of that milestone. Disingenuous DemocRATS are still celebrating the event by asking Dumbed-Down Donors to Donate $10, $25, $100, or $1,000 to Obama’s Organizing for Action, where women staffers are paid less than their male counterparts.

OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE says that’s why we chose George Bernard Shaw’s “Clever and attractive women do not want to vote; they are willing to let men govern them as long as they govern men.”

THE LATEST POLLS: Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says nearly half of voters feel that the media is actively trying to block President Donald Trump from passing his agenda — a stark contrast to how voters felt in the Obama years.

MORE PUTRID POETRY: Children have now returned to schools and we have another timely poem from Bunky Tadwell, the Bard of Cleves.

          Girl-Watching 101
          The Summer Breezes
          Lift the girlies’ skirts
          To our delight we get a look
          At where she daily squirts.

IN THIS WEEK’S COLUMN FROM PATRONAGE COUNTY TITLED “HAVE A NICE WEEKEND,” our Patronage County Reporter found out one sure sign of the high degree in which the work ethic is held by most residents in Patronage County these days is everybody’s fanatical obsession with telling everyone they meet to have a nice weekend.  This op-ed column first appeared in the feisty Mt. Washington Press personally edited by eminently renowned publisher Dennis Nichols on August 15, 1984.

THIS WEEK, OUR LATE NIGHT TV JOKEWATCHER says left-wing late night comedians were really working fake news into their nightly Trump Bashing.

Conan O’Brien said: Last night President Trump said of his critics, “I went to better schools than they did. I was a better student than they were. I live in a bigger, more beautiful apartment. And I live in the White House, too.” Then someone handed Trump a fidget spinner and he quieted right down.

At yesterday’s Trump rally, the crowd was chanting “CNN Sucks!” And man, you do not want to hear what they had to say about the Science Channel.

Last night President Trump spoke at a rally in Arizona and really fired up his supporters. He opened his speech by saying, “Our movement is a movement built on love.” In other words, he started with his best joke.

It is being reported that President Trump is no longer speaking to Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell. Upon hearing this, Melania went to McConnell and said, “Teach me, Master.”

NOW YOU SEE WHY WE’RE SAYING WE’RE STILL HEARING TOO MUCH LEFT-WING HATE SPEECH FROM OUR LATE NIGHT COMEDIANS                 

MEANWHILE, OUR MUCKRAKER says at the Forrest Gump School Board meeting,  the Turpin Majority school board voted 4-1 to rename Brown Stadium at Anderson High School.  With the discovery of a major illegal burying of potentially toxic waste materials next to the field, it will now be known as Brownfield Stadium.  “Not funny.” said outgoing Anderson Minority board member Julie Bissinger who voted against the motion.

ALSO IN ANDERSON, with all that memorial vandalizing going on these days, Trustees are worried when AntiFa thugs will damage the Peace Pole at Beech Acres, since monstrosity triggers an offense for people who love the military, and somebody noticed some Arabic writing, which is of course a micro aggression against Christians and both Jewish families living in  Anderson. 

THE LOCAL DEMO-LABOR PARTY is really excited these days because of the way DemocRAT Aflac Pureval is running the Clerk of Courts Office. So how come when we just Googled “Hamilton County Clerk of Courts,” just saw this?

IN KENTUCKY, Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says according to the Conservative Daily Post, in the wake of sudden, orchestrated hatred for monuments that have graced the nation for hundreds of years, one town is standing up to the rioting bullies. Brandenburg, Kentucky residents and officials agreed to preserve history instead of revising it like progressives want to do. Last summer, before liberals realized that the Russia hoax wasn’t going to work and they switched the narrative to imaginary racism, the citizens of the town banded together to save a Confederate monument that was being removed from Louisville.  After pressure from academics from the University of Louisville, the statue was removed in 2015. But, now it has a home among people who respect the past, even the parts that are shameful.

LOCAL NUDISTS will have to find somewhere else to let if all hang out, now that Paradise Gardens has closed. 

THE SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL
Although our campaign is not associated with the Failed United Way, your liberal guilt-giving throughout the year still makes it all possible.

                   

 SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL HOT LINE
e-mail your stories about worthy waifs today.

LIBERAL LUNACY: In Human Events’ #256 is to Define Multiculturalism as the state-sanctioned grievance industry that stokes division and resentment, while always under the delusion that it is doing something positive called “celebrating diversity.”

JOHN GALT says, “The evil of the world is made possible by nothing but the sanction you give it.”

WHISTLEBLOWER SENIOR BUSINESS EDITOR MERRILL FORBES says with a third of the year left, the market has turned in a strong performance so far in 2017. U.S. stocks sit near record levels, and international equities have logged double-digit gains for the first time since 2013. And despite the polarizing, if not chaotic, political atmosphere that has characterized much of the year, markets have posted healthy returns with only modest bouts of volatility. So where do we go from here? Here are three key questions about the markets’ recent run and what it means for the road ahead. 

THE FREE GRAIN PARTY still stands as the last refuge of anyone who’s willing to help himself from the stores of others, and according to a recent poll, Bernie Sanders is the most popular politician in America. The Harvard-Harris survey, published first in The Hill, found almost 60% of Americans view the Vermont senator favorably. They hope he runs again for president in 2020 so he can promise them more FREE Stuff.

Free Grain Party Members include all DemocRATS, RINO Republicans, some TEA Partiers, quite a few Independents, disgruntled postal workers, senior citizens demanding free prescriptions, those who believe bigger government is the answer to all their problems, everybody who said “what Bill Clinton did was indefensible, but he shouldn’t be removed from office,” and those who think pork-barrel spending is OK as long as their district gets the money.

Unfortunately, that group probably doesn’t include all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters Who Put The Positively Worst President in History In The White House—Twice, and Failed Trying To Give Obama a Third Term By Voting For Hillary, and get all of their “fake news” from our Obama Supporters in the Press, like the ones at The Fishwrap and on Channel 5, 9, 12, and 19.

FINALLY, AT TODAY’S MEETING OF THE CONSERVATIVE AGENDA, Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane was explaining how it was a year ago during the NFL preseason that overpaid San Francisco 49er quarterback Colin Kaepernick first refused to stand for the national anthem as part of the current #BlackLiesMatter protest. Kneepad Liberals in The Press still haven’t reported about the time “Oppressed” Kaepernick was fined $11,000 for calling a Black Opponent a “Nigger.”

Remember: We never print all the bad stuff we know and certain people ought to be damn glad we don’t, especially Ohio’s Delusional Governor John Kasich, who told Jake Tapper on FAKE NEWS CNN’s “State of the Union” last week that he was not currently planning to challenge President Donald Trump in the 2020 presidential election, but he would be available to sidestep the issue again every Sunday if Tapper wanted to interview him again. Yesterday, Kasich sent out an e-mail reminding everybody to watch him this morning on NBC’s “Meet the Depressed,” where he said it would be “out of bounds” for President Trump to pardon an individual for a political purpose.

AND COMING UP IN “THE WEEK THAT WILL BE”

MONDAY (AUGUST 28) The Blower will be honoring MLK from a Conservative’s Perspective on 54th anniversary of Martin Luther King, Jr.’s “I Have a Dream Speech.”

TUESDAY (AUGUST 29) The Blower will be talking more about the upcoming Political Lying Season…. and our “Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers” will be quoting the best of them.

WEDNESDAY (AUGUST 30) we’ll be checking to see how much the Destroy Trump Media Establishment has politicized the Hurricane Harvey coverage, especially after Trump’s visit to the hurricane-stricken region of Texas on Tuesday.

THURSDAY (AUGUST 31) we’ll be checking to see if Anderson Trustee Andy Pappas’ opponent is making up any more lies about him on Facebook.

THE FIRST LINE OF FRIDAY’S (SEPTEMBER 1) Limerick is “Here’s what we’ll celebrate on this Labor Day”

AND SATURDAY (SEPTEMBER 2) will be our “Annual Salute to Pollution Fest,” which is how Labor Day Weekend is celebrated in the Queen City. 

Plagiarism Count: Unattributed material was filched from a mere 742 different websites for the production of today’s Blower, many of our filches were from our friends at Weasel Zippers.

WEEK IN REVIEW HOT LINE
e-mail your revolutionary recaps today

Some political score-keeping items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally political score-keeping subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more.

TODAY’S WHISTLEBLOWER VIDEO
Actions Speak Louder Than Words: The Real Donald Trump

Current Whistleblower Policies and Disclaimers can be found here

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