TODAY IS
THURSDAY, OCTOBER 19, 2023
TRUMP’S ONE-THOUSAND-AND-SECOND DAY OUT-OF-OFFICE
AND THE WHISTLEBLOWER MEMOIRS BUNKY TADWELL’S GHOST-WRITING WILL SURELY EXPLAIN HOW OUR BELOVED PUBLISHER WAS REPUTED IN THE PRESS TO BE A PART-TIME RABBINICAL SCHOLAR. LATER HE TAUGHT ISRAELI NEWS AND CURRENT EVENTS AT ISAAC M WISE CENTER SUNDAY SCHOOL AND WILL NOW BE COVERING THE ISRAELI’S HAMAS WAR IN THE BLOWER.
NEARLY THIRTY-TWO YEARS AGO TODAY…
Edition #73 (published on October 22, 1991) of the original printed edition of The Whistleblower (not the Newswire) was delivered to Persons of Consequence all over town. It was our “It It Weren’t For Leaks, We Wouldn’t Have Any News” Edition, and our REALLY BIG STORY was all about Sandy Beckwith’s turn before the Senate Judiciary Committee. Our TOP TEN LIST listed the top ten reasons Ray Combs opened a comedy club in Downtown Cincinnati. And will wonders never cease, our REMEDIAL MATH story told all about how Enquirer staffer Patricia Lopez Baden had finally reported that the 9.83 mil school reform was actually a 38% tax increase, a mere six weeks after that fact had become known in The Whistleblower.
PAGE TWO featured another REAL EDITORIAL BY PUBLISHER CHARLES FOSTER KANE talking about the Campaign Finance Reports that none of the real voters cared one whit about. REAL FACTS told about Marge Schott’s induction into the Racist Hall of Fame. FETAL ATTRACTION told about the Operation Rescue protesters who got themselves arrested at the Planned Parenthood demonstration. And Anita Hill was annihilated in the WEEKLY WHISTLEBLOWER LIMERICK CONTEST. MR. BLACKWELL’S WORST-DRESSED LIST told us the seven worst-dressed local women for 1991, along with the designer’s comments.
PAGE THREE featured CHEAP SHOTS taken at Teddy Kennedy, Howard Metzenbaum, Jeff Ruby, Jerry Springer, and Dennis Maxberry, whoever the hell he was. There was the customary promo for Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane’s appearance on a local radio talk show, and Bunky Tadwell told us all about “Deadbeats” in ANOTHER GUEST EDITORIAL.
PAGE FOUR featured the REAL LETTERS FROM REAL SUBSCRIBERS, and during all those years, not a single one of those people has ever called to complain that their letter might not have been real. In ANOTHER EXCLUSIVE WHISTLEBLOWER REPORT, we reported the biggest lies of Campaign ’91, In AT THE DIRTY MOVIES, Weikel and Leis spent all afternoon in a darkened balcony reviewing Clarence Thomas’ favorite X-rated video “Long Dong Silver.” And George Voinovich appeared in a “Citizens for a Mediocre Education” ad for the Cincinnati Public Schools 38% Tax Increase.
PAGE FIVE featured Ken Camboo’s BLUEGRASS HOLLER, reporting on Larry Hopkins bouncing 32 checks at the House of Representatives Homeboy Bank, the Great Weiner War in Campbell County, Northern Kentucky Bureau Chief J. R. Hatfield’s “Conventional Financing” told what happened when the Northern Kentucky Convention and Visitors Bureau took its dog-and-pony show to Frankfort, Kentucky Republicans were celebrating the confirmation of Clarence Thomas at the Supreme Court, and Marlene Mandible was our UNITED APPALL PERSON OF THE WEEK.
And PAGE SIX included HOTLINE HANG-UPS, with some of the anonymous calls we received last week on the Whistleblower Hotline. And right before those FAKE CLASSIFIED ADS, and Whistleblower Gossip Columnist Linda Libel reported what happened when she and Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane attended the Young Friends of the Zoo’s Beastly Ball as “celebrity judges.” You should see some of those names in that column. We wonder if any of them are still alive these days.
It was a lot of fun publishing The Whistleblower in those 1991.
That’s why we say “Those were the good old days.”
You can download that entire edition HERE.