TODAY IS
SUNDAY, DECEMBER 30, 2018
Trump’s 709th Day In Office

Is The Schumer Shutdown Over Yet?

This Sunday in America…at the Church of The Compassionate Conservative, Beloved Whistleblower Publisher, the Right-Wing Reverend Charles Foster Kane was asking God’s help “Praying for More P-Words” in 2019, since it looks like we used a whole lot of them for our Sunday Sermons in 2018, and a timeline of our 2018 Sermons looks like a pretty good review of what was happening in American Politics last year.

First we were “Praying to Keep Our New Year’s Resolutions,” “Praying For  Precise and Plainspoken Political Punditry,” “Praying For Principled Politicians,” and “Praying For Political Patriotism.”

Then we were “Praying For Practical Political Policies,” “Praying For Patriots,” “Praying For Political Parades,” “Praying For Proper Punctuation,” “Praying For Protective Police Officers,” and “Praying For Presidential Principles.”

Then we were “Praying For Presidential Perspicacity,” “Praying For Prosecutions,” “Praying For Pastimes,” “Praying For Palms And Passovers,” “Praying For Prayer,” “Praying For Primaries,” and “Peeing Russian Prostitutes.”

Then we were “Persuasive Public Speaking Ability,” “Persistent Political Pummeling,” “Praying For Members Of Our Military,” “Praying For Permanent Peace,” “Praying For Political Parity,” and “Praying For Plumbing.”

Then we were “Praying For Plunderers And Pilferers,” “Praying For Political Picnics,” “Praying For Restoring Decorum,” “Praying For Powerful Palavering,”  “Praying For Political Patriotism,” and “Praying For The President’s Putin Partnership.”

Then we were “Praying For Printable Planners,” “Praying For Peaceful Politics,” “Praying For Practical Political Post-Mortem Participation,” and “Praying For Making American Prayer Great Again.”

Then we were “Praying For Patellas,” “Praying For Political Pallbearers,” “Praying For Political Prevaricators,” and “Praying For The U.S. Constitution.”

Then we were “Praying For Peaceful Political Protests,” “Praying For Politeness And Propriety,” “Praying For Peaceful Politics,” “Praying For Prevention,” “Praying For Political Passion,” “We’re Praying For Pelosi,” “Praying For Parodies,” and “Praying For Piety In The Press.”

Then we were “Praying For Patriotic Pride,” “Praying To See How Many People Actually Remembered,” and for Christmas we were “Praying For Politics-Free Bible Stories.”

And looking at America today, it looks like we’ll have “Plenty To Pray For in 2019.”