FRIDAY, APRIL 01, 2022
TRUMP’S FOUR-HUNDRED-AND THIRTY-SIXTH DAY OUT-OF-OFFICE
AND ANOTHER WOKE MONTH HAS JUST BEEN COMPLETED
Because Women’s Lives Really, Really Matter
This week, everybody who thinks the only reason guys would ever enroll in a “Women’s History Class” is to score some easy poontang, e-mailed an entry to the Whistleblower Limerick Contest. The winner is Oliver Klozhoff, who says those dumb sluts fall for that “sensitive crap” every time.
Oliver wins an “I Really Care What You Think, Bitch!” Sweatshirt, a book of “1001 Pickup Lines Impressionable Young College Girls Can’t Resist,” and of course a front-row seat at that upcoming Snowflake Training 101 seminar at a local university which claims it will increase the visible presence of students, staff, and faculty who can help to shape a campus culture that is accepting of all people regardless of sexuality, gender identification/expression, or any other difference. His winning limerick is:
This month don’t forget Women’s History
Still why any guy would take such a course is a mystery!
But if the girls think you care,
You have another story to share,
With the guys, about your Women’s History Month victory.
And From Our Perturbed Park Hills Poet We Have
This month don’t forget Women’s History,
Decreed by a “feminist” consistory.
If you doxx all the dykes who thought up this crap,
You’ll find them all over the Bolshevik map.
True women’s history? Some facts they won’t face:
Eve took the apple; good-bye human race.
Delilah gave Samson a really close shave –
His manhood was toxic to that slutty knave.
St. John the Baptist got twelve inches shorter
When Herod obeyed a dancing twit’s order.
Effeminate men and masculine females
Are denizens of hell, with Marxist entrails.
Motherhood and apple pie are in their sights,
Attacked by promoting nonsensical “rights.”
Beware of reds hiding under your bed:
March is the month when your gender they’ll shred.
Finally, Last Year Perturbed In Park Hills Says
This month don’t forget Women’s History –
That sex with mysterious chemistry.
“WAIT!” shriek the harpies from LGBS,
“Clearly a case of cis-gender duress!
No month for non-binaried injustice?
Are you implying that you don’t trust us?
Women’s History month is transphobic!
Your hate is clearly something microbic!”
Who will be the first to grovel to them?
Biden? Hillary? Another faux femme?
Here’s a toast to the women among us:
Over you, I gladly make quite a fuss.
Our families’ futures are in your hands,
So keep identifying with your glands.
Ignore the ghouls and their shrill victim-hood;
Those fake feminists are up to no good.
This Year, He Was Even More Perturbed When He Wrote
This month don’t forget Women’s History
It’s a dark tale of clitor-isity.
Black History was all about white guilt,
And this is more of the same, to the hilt.
Motherhood, that most noble profession,
According to feminists, “oppression.”
Gloria Steinem and Betty Friedan –
CIA girl plus ugly harridan –
Nattered on about “Feminine Mystique,”
Which had a cunningly Communist reek.
Their goal is to destroy the family
With their false “liberation” homily.
Lure faithful mothers out of hearth and home
And send them out into the world to roam
In search of “rights,” “equality” and dough –
No longer with kids or hubbies in tow.
“Women must be more like men,” so they say,
“Our work is equal, we want equal pay!”
Many a fool’s been suckered by this ruse,
Hypnotized by a foul male-hating muse.
This month don’t forget Women’s History:
An exercise in clitoris-ity
The pussy hat “male chauvinist pig” crowd
(Which includes RINOS, for cryin’ out loud)
Has taken the stage to promote male guilt
Using the media, the house that lies built.
Woman was made from one of Adam’s ribs
But God didn’t intend to make them libs
With nose rings, tattoos and purple hairdos
Screaming about their “rights” like ghoulish shrews.
Shouldn’t K. Brown Jackson recuse herself
From this month’s events? Her views, off the shelf
Of Marxist hogwash, are far to the left;
Of common sense she is rather bereft.
Since she can’t define what a woman is,
I wonder in which head she takes a wiz?
Has she looked at her crotch to see what’s there?
Is her gender obscured by all that hair?
Why do these freaks want to be more like men?
Go turn back the clock and be born again!
A-MEN and A-WOMAN!
The first line of next week’s limerick is:
“This year on the Reds’ Opening Day”
Cheri Oteri On Women’s History – Saturday Night Live
This Is Your Official Women’s History Month Limerick. Any Other Women’s History Month Limerick You Might See Would Surely Be A Fake.
Coming in The Blower’s Women’s History Month Swimsuit E-dition: “Who Says They All Have To Be Ugly?”