Your Official Publication of Record For The Conservative Agenda
THURSDAY, MAY 3, 2018
Tonight’s Top Conservative News Stories You Won’t See On The Front Page Of Tomorrow’s Fishwrap
(Or On Channels 5, 9, 12, And 19, Either)
— Tonight’s Top Story —
Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane why there wasn’t any special mention of World Press Freedom Day today. In 1993, the UN General Assembly proclaimed May 3 each year to be World Press Freedom Day, and each year, UNESCO awards the UNESCO/Guillermo Cano World Press Freedom Prize to someone who has made a major contribution towards journalistic freedom.
“We didn’t win this year’s award,” Kane explained, since the 2018 Prize was awarded to Egyptian photojournalist Mahmoud Abu Zeid, has been selected as the laureate of the 2018 UNESCO/Guillermo Cano Press Freedom Prize. “But I understand we were a runner up.”
—Tonight’s Top Trump Tweet —
Unfortunately the Destroy Trump Media Disrupted National Day of Prayer Ceremonies at the White House with a Live Segment…
…and Shouted Questions about Stormy Daniels.
READ MORE HERE
— TONIGHT’S NEWSMAKERS —
— TONIGHT’S BEN GARRISON MOMENT —
The Deep State Swamp gets to decide who becomes President..not you!
Ben Garrison’s latest cartoon shows the incredible double standards of the politicized FBI and CIA who make sure ‘their’ people, members of The Big Club such as Hillary, get protected while outsiders get surveilled and smeared by their mainstream media. Crimes committed by their fellow swamp creatures get covered up.
Non-swamp dwellers are attacked. Hence Mueller’s current witch-hunt to get Trump impeached….
A lot of swamp draining remains to be done.
—Ben Garrison
TO SEE MORE BEN GARRISON ILLUSTRATIONS, CLICK HERE
— TONIGHT’S PHOTO-SHOP EDITORIAL SPOOFS ON CURRENT EVENTS FROM EDWARD CROPPER —
TO SEE MORE PHOTO SHOP EDITORIAL SPOOFS FROM EDWARD CROPPER, CLICK HERE
— Whistleblower NFL Boycott Countdown Continues —
The Blower Is Still Waiting For Our Soros-Funded Boycott For Mocking David Hogg To Begin
With Only Five More Days Until Ohio’s Senate Primary Elections, Sherrod Brown Still Believes DemocRATS Have A Mandate To Raise Taxes.
And Mike Gibbons Asks If Renacci is a “Blue Collar DemocRAT”
— Anderson Redskin Rebellion —
Keep Our Redskins! Coordinator Sue Veldkamp has earned the “Official Whistleblower Nickname”
of “Suercules,” for her Herculean efforts fighting the 
forces of Political Correctness in Anderson Township, as well as theCorruption and Stupidity in the Forest Hills School District.
“Suercules” shouldn’t be confused with “Suezilla.” Anderson TEA Party Warrior Princess Sue Hardenbergh earned that “Official Whistleblower Nickname” years ago.
— Tonight’s Whistleblower Not-Faking News —
— TONIGHT’S REAL NEWS FROM OTHER SATIRICAL WEB SITES —
(Commenting On Today’s Top Stories)
Caitlyn Jenner To Wed Transgender Individual 47 Years His/Her Junior
Sources claim 68-year-old Caitlyn Jenner will marry 21-year-old transgender student Sophie Hutchins (below).
“Despite their age difference, the two are deeply in love and want to get married as soon as one of them gets a vagina. The last thing Caitlyn wants on his/her honeymoon is a sword fight,” said a mutual friend.
TO SEE MORE BIG HAIRY NEWS, CLICK HERE 
Hillary: I Lost Because I’m A Dirty, Dirty Capitalist Pig!
TO SEE MORE STORIES FROM THE PEOPLE’S CUBE, CLICK HERE
Woman Celebrated For Killing 3.5 Million People
TO HEAR MORE BUZZ FROM THE BABYLON BEE, CLICK HERE
Girls Scouts Announces They’ll Never Ever Let Gross Fucking Boys In
NEW YORK—Responding to the Boy Scouts’ decision to open up their organization to all genders, the Girl Scouts of America officially announced Thursday that they’ll never ever let any gross-ass fucking boys in. “The Girls Scouts remain dedicated to raising the next generation of America’s women leaders, and as such, there is no way in hell we’d ever consider letting a…
TO SEE MORE STORIES FROM THE ONION, CLICK HERE
— Tonight’s Top Three Whistleblower Political Posters —
— SUPPORT YOUR FAVORITE FAKE NEWS SITE —
The Whistleblower Newswire Is The Official Publication of Record For The Conservative Agenda
The Blower believes we’re still living during the most important period in American History for our non-stop campaign against Political Correctness, the Devolution of American Culture, and the Liberal News Media. Congress and the Liberal Media Establishment will continue to lie and say really stupid things without a smidgen of journalistic integrity in their effort to advance the Liberal Agenda.
Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane Says The Conservative Agenda Is Now Completing Working On Donald Trump’s Third 100 Days To Make America Great Again. Today Is Day Number 468. There Are Now Only 914 More Days Until Trump’s Re-election Day on November 3, 2013.
