MONDAY, AUGUST 22, 2016
Today’s Good News And Bad News
From Our Local Political Junkie We’ll Call “Cincy Dave”

HUUUUUGE TRUMP FLIP-FLOP?
The Donald has made deporting the 11 or 12 or 30 million undocumented aliens the biggest issue of his campaign, starting from day one.   But reports are that he is about to say that he didn’t mean any of it.  He is supposed to give a major speech on immigration on Thursday, so watch for the flip-flop.   Could this be a play for the Hispanic vote?  Of course, – and they will all run out and vote for him now, cause he really really means it this time. 

HILLARY LOOKING FOR A TRUMP
Hillary’s campaign is looking for someone to play Trump in her debate practice sessions.  Campaign manager Robby Mook says the campaign hasn’t decided yet who will act as Republican rival Donald Trump.  “It’s very hard to find someone to mimic the reckless temperament and the hateful instincts and divisive instincts of Donald Trump,” he said.

We suggest they try Ted Cruz, AKA “Brutis”.  –  He is an excellent debater and what he lacks in reckless temperament, he makes up for in hateful and divisive instincts.

GOOD NEWS FOR PUSSY GALORE
Today is Pussy Galore’s birthday.   It is good that Pussy lasted so long – longer than most Pussies do – Actress and singer Honor Blackman is 91 today.   She says there is no truth to the rumor that her father gave her the unusual first name because she was conceived when, after months of courtship and a night of heavy drinking, her mother finally offered him the ultimate prize –  Of course, he honored her offer and they spent the rest of the weekend just like that – offer and honor, honor and offer.  

Happy, happy birthday, Pussy.   You made so many of us happy, so many times.

TODAY’S MEANINGLESS POLLS
As everyone should know, Ohio is the graveyard of Republican presidential campaigns.  Lose Ohio and it’s over.   Also, for some reason, Trump has stopped tweeting about polls. We just couldn’t figure out why but Nate Silver, over at Five Thirty Eight has a couple of ideas.

MORE GOOD NEWS AND BAD NEWS TOMORROW