FRIDAY, AUGUST 19, 2016
What Else Rhymes With “Nantucket?”
This week, everybody who thinks it’s wrong for Obama to go on another lavish over-taxed payer funded vacation when so many Americans will be staying home on their vacations, that’s if they’ve been lucky enough to find jobs during Obama’s Longest Economic Recovery in History, e-mailed an entry to the Whistleblower Limerick Contest.
The winner is our own Kennebunk Tadwell, whom we have all come to know and love as the Bard of Cleves, (shown here watching the parade still passing him by) who wonders how the media would cover a white Republican president partying during a race riot, like Obama did two years ago when the Obamas danced to nearly every song during a birthday party at the Farm Neck Golf Club in Martha’s Vineyard, while cops and protesters exchanged tear gas and Molotov cocktails at the big race riot in Ferguson, Missouri.
Bunky wins an “I Vacationed With Obama” T-Shirt; an autographed pictures of Obama playing his 190th round of golf seven minutes after he finished his comments on the Missouri race riots; and an e-mail from Joe Biden offering to enter Bunky in that lottery to meet Obama at the Labor Day “Barbeque with Barack” Party for a mere $28 donation. His winning limerick is:
When Obama went to Nantucket
It cost us more than a drop in a bucket.
His job bores him to tears,
So for the next two and a half years,
He’s telling us all just to go suck it.
(Or was that Bill Clinton’s Limerick?)
Robin in Ludlow says
When Obama went to Nantucket
Having shred the Constitution, he said fuck it
I have a pen and a phone
I can do things on my own
And those who like the rule of law can just suck it
And from the Anderson Laureate, who says it would be blasphemous to try to improve on the classic “Man From Nantucket” (with a really long penis):
There once was a man from Nantucket
Whose dick was so long he could suck it
He said with a grin
While wiping his chin
If my ear were a hole I could fuck it.
The First Line of Next Week’s Limerick Is
“How dumb can a vice president be?”
OBAMA BLACK LIES MATTER RACE RIOTS HOT LINE
e-mail us your incendiary invocations today.
Some calling-for-calm items in today’s Blower
were sent in by our equally calling-for-calm subscribers.
Whistleblower Video of the Day
State Department Spox Tries To Explain What Iran-som Is
Note: We guarantee iPhone subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.