THURSDAY, MAY 19, 2016
We Were Only Joking
Yesterday, The Blower was only kidding about all those stupid voters in Kentucky and apathetic people staying away from the polls in droves on Primary Election Day, but darned if they all weren’t all using it as a script.
At least all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters Who Put The Positively Worst President in History In The White House—Twice, and get all of their information from our Obama Supporters in the Press, like the ones on Channel 5, 9, 12, and especially 19. allowed the 2016 DemocRAT Presidential Primary to end in a virtual tie Tuesday night, as Crooked Hillary led Bernie Sanders by 1,924 votes (about one half of 1%). Sanders won’t be bothering to ask Clintonista Secretary of State Alison Wondergams Grimes to review the election results, since the bother wound up with the same number of Delegates, and Trailer Park Owner Nathan “Cornbread” Smith wound up with egg all over his face after he predicted Disgraced Ex-President Bill Clinton’s Enabler would win Tuesday night’s Bluegrass DemocRAT Presidential Primary over Bernie Sanders by a “wide margin” because of all the time and energy she’d supposedly invested in the campaign, and nobody in the news media bothered to follow up and ask “Cornbread” what the hell he was talking about.
TWENTY-FIVE YEARS AGO THIS WEEK: (when The Whistleblower used to be printed and delivered all over town), Edition #51 came out on May 21, 1991 and featured “A Thousand Points of Spite.” But the Really Big Story was although Britain’s Queen Elizabeth II planned a personal visit to Kentucky that week, it would not include a side trip to Cincinnati. Whistleblower_Newswire_Classic_Edition51
HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says on this date in 1935, Lawrence of Arabia died, but the movie didn’t come out till 1962, and maybe that’s why The Blower remembers that classic line from the movie when Peter O’Toole said, “There may be honor among thieves, but there’s none in politicians.” Ain’t that the truth!
MORE LIBERAL LUNACY: The Eight Days of Greatness (May 23-30) It’s supposed to be a way for Loony Liberals to tap into that greatness by giving something of ourselves, small or large, near or far. It will involve acts of greatness around a specific theme each day. Kum Ba Yah, Everybody!
MORE RACIAL HEALING UPDATES: Does anybody remember last year when Race-Baiting Minister Bobby Hinton vowed in March to use the All-Star Game spotlight to draw attention to the continuing prosecution of Convicted Juvenile Court Judge Tracie Hunter in Cincinnati. Bobby no doubt would be available for quotes tomorrow morning in Judge Dinkelacker’s courtroom if Judge Traci is hauled off to the slammer.
IN ANDERSON, patriots are wondering if local war hero PFC James Miller, IV (for whom the “PFC James Miller, IV Memorial Highway” was named three years ago) will again be recognized this Memorial Day. The Blower didn’t see any mention of his name in connection with the Anderson Township Veterans Memorial Committee’s annual remembrance of fallen veterans at the Memorial Day Bell and Remembrance Ceremony, set for 11:45 AM at the Anderson Center.
CONSERVATIVE CURMUDGEON STU MAHLIN says Veterans will probably be boycotting their local Kroger stores on Memorial Day because Kroger will no longer be letting them pass out poppies in exchange for donations this Memorial Day.
TROUBLE-MAKING TAILGATER TINO DELGATO says Last year there were 19 former Reds in the playoffs for OTHER teams. This year there may be even more along with former manager Dusty Baker. 
Dusty took the Reds to three playoff appearances in four years but was fired. One man’s junk is another man’s treasure. The Reds are the new “Farm System” for Major League Baseball’s other 29 teams. Look for Dusty to lead his new team to the playoffs as the Reds continue to “rebuild”. Go Figure!!!
FINALLY, AT YESTERDAY’S MEETING OF THE CONSERVATIVE AGENDA, Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane about that giant sucking sound coming from Mediocre American Ballpark these days. Then Whistleblower Senior Spoiled Sports Editor Andy FurBall chimed in with a joke he’d heard from one of the Reds ushers who wishes to remain anonymous and employed: “Did you hear about that new laxative called ‘Reds Bullpen?’ It always produces a lot of runs.”
BLUEGRASS NOT REALLY A RECOUNT HOT LINE
e-mail your electoral expertise today
Some recanvassed items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally recanvassed subscribers.
Whistleblower Video of the Day
Why Don’t We See Candidates Like This Anymore?
Note: We guarantee iPhone subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.
