SUNDAY, APRIL 10, 2016
This Sunday in America…at the Church of The Compassionate Conservative, Beloved Whistleblower Publisher, the Right-Wing Reverend Charles Foster Kane was asking his Political Parishioners to remember some of our weekly sermons during the first part of this Election Year.
On the First Sunday this year, we were asking God’s help for Americans to be able to keep some of their New Year’s Resolutions for at least until Election Day 2016 on November 8.
On the Second Sunday this year, we were asking God’s help for Cincinnati Sports Fanatics having difficulty coping after the Bungals were “One-and-Done” for the seventh time in Saturday Night’s AFC Wild Card Playoff Game. Some Sports Obsessed Fans were even calling it the “Epic Choke” of all time.
On the Third Sunday this year, we were asking God’s help bringing real debates to the American people throughout the 2016 Political Campaigns.
On the Fourth Sunday This Year, we were asking God’s blessings on all of the candidates taking part during our 2016 Primary Elections, especially the ones in Clermont County. But first, we thought it would be a good idea if people understood something about Primary Elections.
On the First Sunday in February, we could not help but tell our Conservative Congregation about Obama’s highly publicized (and politicized) visit to the Islamic Society of Baltimore – an American mosque with ties to the Muslim Brotherhood, Al Qaeda, and the Taliban.
On the Next Sunday in February, we asked God’s help bringing Civility to Obama’s Divided America. Kane actually got the idea for today’s Conservative Sermon when he heard the Divider-in-Chief pretending to push for “Greater Civility in Politics” during his phony-baloney weekly presidential address.
On the Next Sunday in February, we asked for God’s help for Senate Republicans to Stay Strong, because with the current vacancy on the Supreme Court, there will be immense pressure from Obama, Disingenuous DemocRATS in Congress, and their Willing Accomplices in the Liberal News Media to appoint a new justice immediately.
On the Last Sunday in February, we were asking God’s help healing our nation that has been driven mad by Obama.
On the First Sunday in March, we were asking God’s help restoring some semblance of Decorum during the Devolution of American Culture in the Age of Obama.
On the Second Sunday in March, we were praying for God’s help to make sure only voters who are actually smart enough to vote show up at the polls to vote in the Ohio Presidential Primary on Tuesday.
On the Third Sunday in March, we were to asking God’s help to understand the meaning of Political Parables, similar to those simple stories used to illustrate morals or spiritual lessons, as told by Jesus in the Gospels.
On Easter Sunday we were asking God to bring Vengeance on all those suicidal extremists who hate the West and plan to carry out attacks against us.
Last Sunday, we were asking for God to help members of the Establishment Pray for Republican Party Boss Reince Priebus to figure out what he’s supposed to be doing about the problems the Republican National Committee appears to be having between now and his upcoming Clusterfuck Convention in Cleveland.
And this Sunday, we’re were asking God to check over some of the things we’ve been praying for this year, because it looks like there’s still a whole lot of work to be done, especially the stuff we were praying for in last week’s sermon, when we were asking God to help Republican Party Boss Reince Priebus get his head out of his ass.
