THURSDAY, MARCH 24, 2016
March Madness Mishmash
The worst part about March Madness besides all of that endless hype about all those NCAA Men’s Basketball Teams like Motherfucker State you really couldn’t care less about, is the nation’s loss of productivity, because thousands of businesses continue to suffer when millions of employees watch scores on their computers or games on their iPhones instead of actually working. That wasted productivity costs the U.S. economy billions of dollars.
Each March, tens of millions of brackets are filled out, but the odds that a bracket will be perfect, are only that is, every game guessed correctly, are only 9.2 quintillion to one. Why do you think Warren Buffet knew he was safe offering $1 billion to anybody who can fill out a perfect 2014 NCAA tournament bracket?
And Everywhere You Look, It’s March Madness
Remember: We never print all the bad stuff we know and certain people ought to be damn glad we don’t, especially “Oliver Klozhoff.”
Now From This Week, Here’s How “The Sweet Sixteen” Would Play Out If The Richest Teams Won Every Game
Another Proud Sponsor and Avid Fan
Today’s edition is brought to you by a generous “in-kind” donation during our March fund-raising drive by the Republican National Committee hope to find a way to Stop Donald Trump at the Convention in Cleveland in July.
MARCH MADNESS HOTLINE
e-mail your perfect brackets today.