TUESDAY, MARCH 1, 2016

And We Just Couldn’t Stop Gloating

         Christmas came early at the Whistleblower Newswire’s offices on Super Tuesday in 2012, when the entire staff stayed up late to put out a special edition to that Corrupt Evicted Lying Plagiarizing Meddling Overblown Bought-and-paid-For Tax-and-Spend Wrinkle-Puss RINO Bitch-in-a-Ditch “Mean Jean” Schmidt had finally been defeated, because the Maggie/Che$ley/Cunningham cabal was unable to save Old Wrinkle-Puss one last time. Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane even invited everybody to join The Whistleblower Munchkin Chorus singing, “Ding, Dong, the Witch is Dead.”

Throughout Ohio’s Second Congressional District, you won’t believe the number of people who were then trying to take credit for being the one who’d finally driven a wooden steak through “Mean Jean’s” heart, because when the votes were counted, Whistleblower Faux Facebook Friend “Bronze Star Brad” Wenstrup had soundly defeated our Dead Bitch-in-a-Ditch.

But our Quote for Today Committee remembers in 1961, responding to a question by a journalist about the Bay of Pigs, when JFK said: “…victory has 100 fathers and defeat is an orphan.”

Hurley the Historian said in 1990, John Boehner got 49% of the vote when he defeated corrupt incumbent Buz Lukens in the Republican Primary. That Super Tuesday night, “Bronze Star Brad” only got 48.79%.  So if it’s any consolation to Her Meanness, it would appear that Second District Republican voters view her as only slightly less horrible than a convicted sex offender.

And can you believe at press time, with 3% of the vote counted, Fred Kundrata still hadn’t conceded! Tony Brush sent an e-mail Wednesday morning (Mean Jean left a voice mail message Tuesday night), but Fred was apparently not yet convinced that the game was over. The question became, what would Fred do first: File his FEC report that was due since February 23 (to show where the money was coming from) or concede defeat. The Blower said, “Don’t bet on him doing the classy thing anytime soon.”

Meanwhile, another Whistleblower Faux Facebook Friend “Say It Ain’t So Joe” Braun was posting this message on Facebook: “On August 2, 2005, my friend Jean Schmidt became the first woman to represent the Cincinnati area in the United States House of Representatives. I am proud to have been a part of that tough campaign and the effort that launched her career in Congress. I wish Republican Brad Wenstrup the best of luck representing the Second Congressional District. I have called members of his extended family friends for many years and know them to all be good people. I am certain he will continue the tradition of strong leadership we have been blessed to have in the Second Congressional District.”

But here’s what really happened in 2012: Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says “Mean Jean” had a big lead in name recognition early on, so she didn’t even campaign, and her Axis of Evil (Skaggie Maggie at The Fishwrap, Greedy Hearse-Chasing, Disgraced-DemocRAT Clinton-loving, Fen-Phen Scandal Plagued, Not-yet-Disbarred Trial Attorney $tan Che$ley, and WLW Hate Radio’s Bill Cunningham) got lazy and didn’t launch a last minute attack on “Mean Jean’s” main opponent, as had been their effective strategy in previous campaigns. And during the last days of the campaign, the utter arrogance of the Schmitheads started to show, like when Mean Jean’s News Flack Barrett Brunsman failed to intimidate Rory Ryan, Publisher & Owner of the Highland County Press (“We’ll stand by Wenstrup endorsement”)

It became a Perfect Storm when that Super PAC spent all that money to expose “Mean Jean’s” Corruption, and our Tea Party Patriots even targeted her by name. Meanwhile, all across Southwest Ohio, political insiders are wondering what the results would have been had there been even one competent person on the Wenstrup Campaign! E-mailing supporters to ask for money at 1:07 AM on Wednesday before he’d even personally thanked those who might have had a small part in getting him elected was a bit tacky, to say the least. 

Among those crying in their milk the following morning was Republicans for Higher Taxes, a local blog which backed Mean Jean 100%.  They told us they were going to miss all her votes for higher taxes and bigger government, along with her numerous ethical scandals and public make-out sessions with Barack Obama.  They also reported worthless blogging blimp Matt Hurley, a complete Schmidt tool, was starting a hunger strike in protest of Wenstrup’s victory.  That could’ve gone on a long time with all his excess reserves. And that Schmidthead from Bizzy Blog was probably on suicide watch. 

The Schmidtheads were idiotic to the end.  When approached by a Mean Jean lackey outside a Blue Ash polling station, a young conservative we’ll call Jeff stated he’ll be sure to vote against Schmidt. On the way out, after he passed her, after he crossed the parking lane, after he opened his car door, the Schmidt lackey yells, “do you like Nancy Pelosi?”  With that, Jeff replied, “I don’t like corruption in either party, that’s why I voted for Brad Wenstrup,” and with that got into his car and spent the rest of the day helping Wenstrup and other conservatives.

It was “Mean Jean” who was a good friend to Pelosi. Demographics said Ohio’s Second Congressional District should always be safe for Republicans. But Schmidt’s incompetence required the national GOP to bail her out on three different occasions, which diverted money from GOP candidates in difficult congressional districts who truly needed the help. Schmidt’s inability to do her job cost the Republican Party seats across the country, including in 2006 and 2008 when Republicans were getting waxed. Could Steve Chabot have held off Driehaus in 2008 if the party didn’t have to waste so much money on Schmidt that year?  We knew Nancy Pelosi was going to miss Mean Jean far more than the voters around here would.

Elsewhere, looking at the rest of the results on the morning after Super Duper Tuesday in 2012, it was Politics as Usual. Mitt Romney was rolling along with 404 of the 1,144 delegates he needed for the 2012 Republican Presidential nomination in Tampa. Revered Former Ohio Congressman Bob McEwen was soldiering on as Newt Gingrich’s happy warrior on TV. And Mike DeWhine’s guarantee that Rick Santorum would win Ohio hadn’t been worth a bucket of warm spit.

The Blower found it amusing that the main stream media had been hyping Super Tuesday for weeks by saying it would make the eventual winner clear, but since it was Romney, all the stories were about “eeking out a win”?!  The Blower understood our Prostitutes in the Press wanted to try to keep the drama alive as long as they can, but what did it say about all their prior assessments of the situation if “Super Tuesday” was nothing more than another day in the race.  “Romney maintains slim lead” should just be the recurrent headline from now till the election.

And were the guys at Political Science Theater 2012 ever wrong about their prediction that getting more people in the race to split “Mean Jean’s” opposition assured her of victory. [WATCH THAT HERE]

Ohio RINO Party Boss Kevin DeWhine had spent $100,000 to keep each of his stooges on the Ohio Republican Party Central Committee by implying they were endorsed by the TEA Party, when the truth was, destroying the TEA Party had always been his goal. Did the Ohio Republican House Caucus spend more than $250,000 to smear opponents of lackeys like $tate Rep-tile for $ale Peter $tautberg? They surely must’ve gotten their money’s worth, because “TaxKiller Tom” Brinkman was DOA when the polls opened on Tuesday. Poor Tom, he could’ve been a contender! School Nazis made sure Anderson property owners of $200,000 houses would be paying $2,000-a-year to support greedy teachers and administrators, with a little help from illegally using school property and public resources to influence the vote and cooperation from the supposedly non political Anderson Area Chamber of Commerce and the unfair and balanced Forest Hills Urinal.

Still, the biggest local Primary Victory Tuesday Night had to go to our Looney Libertarian Jim Berns who eked out 93% win over Queen Noble. Berns would be vying in his fourth losing Congressional effort in November 2012, that time against Republican Steve Chabothead. Queen Nobel came in dead last in her Cincinnati City Clown-cil campaign last fall. She could not be reached for comment because her phone has been disconnected.

Finally, at the Super Tuesday Eve meeting of the Conservative Agenda, Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane if he wouldn’t be going to miss “Mean Jean” Schmidt at least a little bit, especially after the New York Times had given Kane credit for her Official Whistleblower Nickname all those years ago. “She may be gone, but she won’t be forgotten, Kane explained. “Rumor had it that Schmidt and Dennis Kucinich would be opening a charm school.”

Still, things weren’t all bad for “Mean Jean” on Election Night 2012. Especially when you considered she wouldn’t have to re-pay the rest of that $500,000 in legal fees to her Turkish attorneys according to the House Ethics Committee, and she could sell all of her autographed State of the Union Programs and live happily off the proceeds for the rest of her life.

So, to put the 2012 national political race in perspective, Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus said every time our Obama Supporters in the Press said Republicans could never win the 2012 Presidential Elections in then only “242”more days, it was because they weren’t unified behind a single candidate at this time.

Hurley the Historian said you had to look no further than “Crossovers and Cross-dressers” in The Whistleblower Archives on the Thursday after Super Tuesday in 2008. Here’s what it said:

We told you so. Even with all that hype from local reporterettes auditioning for CNN, the Kneepad Liberals’ contest between Hillary and Obama still isn’t over. We liked the blonde bimbo on TV 5 who said, Hillary is the clear widow tonight.” Who gets credit for saying “It ain’t over till the fat lady sings?” We’re not sure, but Tuesday night, our Quote for Today Committee chose Yogi Berra’s “It ain’t over till it’s over.” Cincinnati’s Dainty DemocRAT Mayor Mark Mallory will still enjoy be interviewed about being a superdelegate. Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says this thing may go on so long, those primary elections in Kentucky might actually be relevant.

Have you ever seen so much money spent on a primary? Republicans got so many direct mail pieces from Obama and so many phone calls from Hillary, it’s no wonder they ran out of DemocRAT ballots from all those Rush Limbaugh “crossover” voters, not to mention the “cross-dressers.” Demo-Labor Party Boss Tim Burka says they even ran out of ballots for Dead DemocRATS at the Spring Grove Cemetery.

If you think the voters in Tuesday’s elections were dumbed-down, you should’ve seen the folks from the geezer citizen centers working at the polls. Did you ever wonder if all those poll workers got paid the same amount of money? Shouldn’t the geezer who took 15 minutes not to find your name in the book get more than that smelly old lady who only sat next to him, hollering, “Could you spell your name louder?” And why were the lines so long, you still had to fill in the boxes for all those candidates running unopposed. So much ink, so little choice!

Things certainly haven’t changed much since then, have they?

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Today’s edition is brought to you by a generous “in-kind” donation during our March fund-raising drive by the Wenstrup for Congress Campaign, for reasons which now should seem painfully obvious!

 TAKING CREDIT FOR MEAN JEAN’S DEFEAT HOT LINE

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