SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 6, 2015
More Politics Unusual
THE LATEST POLLS: Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says these are tense times racially, and Americans don’t think President Obama and some other top officials are helping with their repeated criticism of the police. Many hoped the election of the first black president in 2008 would help heal the racial division that has plagued this country for much of its history, but nearly half of voters think Obama has driven the races further apart instead. Only 17% believe most politicians raise racial issues to address real problems anyway. 70% think they talk race just to get elected. [READ MORE HERE]
OUR LATE NIGHT TV JOKEWATCHER liked Jimmy Fallon’s: “I saw that during a town hall in Miami this week, Jeb Bush attacked Donald Trump in both Spanish and English. And later that night, Donald Trump responded in both English and much, much louder English. Anthony Weiner is denying Donald Trump’s suggestion that his wife, Huma, shared classified information with him while she worked for Hillary Clinton. And as we all know, nothing puts a rumor to rest like a denial from Anthony Weiner. “I didn’t send those pics! Oh those pics? Yeah I sent them.” Jimmy Kimmel said, “Today Donald Trump signed a loyalty pledge to the Republican Party saying that he would endorse for president whoever wins the Republican nomination and would not run as a third-party candidate as he has threatened to in the past. And I’ll tell you something. When Donald Trump makes a vow, he keeps it. Ask any of his wives, they will tell you.”
HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says when Ohio Politicians are still pissed off at Obama assassinated Ohio native President McKinley’s name off that mountain in Alaska this week. At Lease Obama didn’t do it today, since on this date in 1901, President William McKinley was shot shaking hands at the Pan-American Exhibition in Buffalo, and died eight days later. To get back at President Obama for renaming a mountain that used to be named after a U.S. president from Ohio, there’s a petition to rename a mountain in Ohio after Sarah Palin.
THAT’S WHY OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE chose Sassy Sarah’s “Obama should have carried a ‘big stick instead of a selfie stick’ during his visit to her state last week amid recent reports of Chinese and Russian aggression.
IN LAST WEEK’S COLUMN FROM PATRONAGE COUNTY TITLED “Labor Daze” our Patronage County Commissioners were talking about why the Labor Day weekend doesn’t seem to be such a big deal these days. This op-ed column never appeared at any time in the feisty Mt. Washington Press personally edited by eminently renowned publisher Dennis Nichols.
LIBERAL LUNACY: In Human Events’ “365 Ways to Drive a Liberal Crazy, #242 says you should tell a joke like Q: How do you starve an Obama supporter? A: Hide his food stamps under his work boots.
JOHN GALT says, “I swear by my life, and my love of it, that I will never live for the sake of another man, nor ask another man to live for mine.”
MORE PUTRID POETRY: This is Labor Day weekend and we have another timely poem from Bunky Tadwell, the Bard of Cleves.
Union Daze
Labor Day is on the way,
The workers gather at Coney.
Bash Trump is the game they’ll play
And the speeches will be phony.
MEANWHILE, OUR MUCKRAKER says has anyone, especially a reporter involved in the gay marriage issue in Kentucky performed a search on the two couples seeking to be married to determine if they are already married, either to each other or different individuals? With the rush to perform those gay marriages, there have been testimonies of numerous couples participating in multiple-marriage ceremonies. Or are they such paragons of virtue that not a single question would ever be raised about those plaintiffs because of the virtue conferred upon them by their gayness?
WHISTLEBLOWER SENIOR BUSINESS EDITOR MERRILL FORBES says U.S. stocks closed down 1.66% more Friday ahead of the long weekend as uncertainty about the timing of a rate hike and Chinese economic growth continued to weigh. Stocks also plummeted because the number of new jobs created in America was a lot less than expected. It’s a good thing U.S. stock markets are closed Monday for the Labor Day holiday, or people’s retirement accounts could be worth a lot less when they go back to work on Tuesday.
THE FREE GRAIN PARTY still stands as the last refuge of anyone willing to help himself from the stores of others, especially AFL-CIO Organizers praying for some really important big name speakers to blame Republicans at tomorrow’s Hamilton County Demo-Labor Party Union Daze Picnic at Coney Island, while most of the Dumbed-Down DemocRAT Union Members will just praying for more FREE Stuff.
Free Grain Party Members include all DemocRATS, RINO Republicans, some TEA Partiers, quite a few Independents, disgruntled postal workers, senior citizens demanding free prescriptions, those who believe bigger government is the answer to all their problems, everybody who said “what Bill Clinton did was indefensible, but he shouldn’t be removed from office,” and those who think pork-barrel spending is OK as long as their district gets the money.
Unfortunately, that group probably doesn’t include all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters Who Put Obama In The White House—Twice, and get all of their information from our Obama Supporters in the Press.
AND AT SUNDAY MORNING’S SERVICE AT THE CHURCH OF THE COMPASSIONATE CONSERVATIVE, Beloved Whistleblower Publisher, the Right-Wing Reverend Charles Foster Kane was asking Political Parishioners to beseech God’s tender mercies on American workers on Labor Day tomorrow. Praying for those poor misguided people is really a religious experience, Kane explained: “Because every time we think about them, you search your soul and say to yourself, Jesus H. Christ, WTF were those stupid people thinking.”
Plagiarism Count: Unattributed material was filched from a mere 742 different websites for the production of today’s Blower, many of our filches were from our friends at Weasel Zippers.
THE SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL
Although our campaign is not associated with the Failed United Way, your liberal guilt giving throughout the year still makes it all possible.
SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL HOT LINE
e-mail your stories about worthy waifs today.
AND COMING UP IN “THE WEEK THAT WILL BE”
MONDAY (SEPTEMBER 7) The Blower will be publishing our Annual “Union Daze” E-dition while we’re continuing to count down the 500 Days of Dishonesty and Division for America remaining during the Dark Ages of Obama’s Second Term, unless the First Black President in History is impeached.
TUESDAY (SEPTEMBER 8) we’ll be reporting on what we overheard at Monday’s Labor Day Picnic at Coney Island and our “Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers” will still be trying to figure out why so many Americans don’t like Union Thugs these days.
WEDNESDAY, (SEPTEMBER 9) we’ll be checking to see if any of those Cincinnati Police Officers taking part in the FOP’s Office Pool to predicted the exact moment Cincinnati City Mangler “Baltimore Harry” Black would be offering Cincinnati’s Current Affirmative Police Chief Jeffrey Blackwell an offer to resign or be fired.
THURSDAY (SEPTEMBER 10) we’ll be covering all those people putting “Hillary in Prison 2016” signs in East Walnut Hills before she arrives for her $2,700-per-person Legal Defense Fund-raiser in East Walnut Hills hosted by Jennie and Allan Berliant.
THE FIRST LINE OF FRIDAY’S (SEPTEMBER 11) LIMERICK IS: “When you watch the Bungals this year.”
AND SATURDAY (SEPTEMBER 12) we’ll be getting ready to celebrate the beginning of the Jewish New Year at sundown on Sunday, when we’ll be wishing everybody a Happy 5776!
Remember: We never print all the bad stuff we know and certain people ought to be damn glad we don’t, especially Cincinnati’s City Mangler “Baltimore Harry” Black figuring out what to do next, as this Award Winning Illustration from Artis Conception’s Archives clearly shows.
WEEK IN REVIEW HOT LINE
e-mail your revolutionary recaps today
Some political score-keeping items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally political score-keeping subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more.
Whistleblower Video of the Week
Trump Talks: Megyn Kelly
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