Sunday, May 10, 2015
Your Whistleblower Week in Review
MONDAY (May 4), in our Special “English Version of Our Illegal Aliens” E-dition, The Blower said, “Hooray-O, Hooray-O, On Cinco De Mayo. Outdoor Sexual Relations begin Today-O!” in our Special “Ohio Indecision 2015” E-dition, The Blower said, “What if they held an election and nobody was running?” and in our Special “Anderson Update” E-dition,” The Blower said, “Jackson Takes Action!”
TUESDAY (May 5), in our Special “Rushing Our Border” E-dition, The Blower said, Welcome “Los DemócRATAS futuros!” in our Special “Mandatory Gloating” E-dition, The Blower said, “Gloat, Gloat, Gloat, Gloat, Gloat, Gloat, Gloat!” and in our Special “PC Alert” E-dition, The Blower said, “Here’s Another Word You’re Not Allowed to Say!”
WEDNESDAY (May 6), in Special “Can’t Stop Gloating” E-dition, The Blower said, “Our Victory Lap has already lasted more than two days!” and in Special “Bluegrass 2015 Primary Update” E-dition, The Blower said, “We’re looking forward to another lively two weeks!”
THURSDAY (May 7), in our Special “Same Time Last Year” E-dition, The Blower said, “Those Were the Good Old Days!” and in our Annual “Day of Prayer Day” E-dition, The Blower said, “Unfortunately, under the Obama Administration we don’t have a prayer!”
FRIDAY (May 8) in our Special “VE Day 70th Anniversary” E-dition, The Blower said, “Those Days We Actually Knew How to Win a War!,” and in our “Just Another Guest Column” E-dition, The Blower said, “It’s still the same old BS!”
SATURDAY (May 9) in our Special “Almost Mother’s Day” E-dition, The Blower said, “Thank your mom for being Pro Life!,” and in our Special “Mother’s Day Warning” E-dition, The Blower said, “This time, they’re coming after your mother!”
You Can’t Say You Aren’t Getting Your Money’s Worth!
This Week’s Top Stories
OUR NUMBER ONE HILLARY CAMPAIGN SCANDAL STORY THIS WEEK was when new revelations about Bill and Hillary appeared in the book “Clinton Cash,” explaining how the Clinton Foundation accepted billions from foreign governments and people doing business with our government.
OUR NUMBER TWO HILLARY CAMPAIGN SCANDAL STORY THIS WEEK was how after having not covered the Clinton Foundation scandal since April 23, ABC’s World News Tonight finally returned to the story with a full report on its Wednesday broadcast about the Clinton Foundation’s lavish summit in Morocco and how the host owns a mining company that’s been accused of committing human rights violations.
AND OUR NUMBER THREE HILLARY CAMPAIGN SCANDAL STORY THIS WEEK was when John Stossel at Fox News asked if Scandal would ever stick to the Clintons. [READ MORE HERE]
Maybe this would be a good place to start
Edward Cropper’s World
Today, PHOTO-SHOP EDITORIAL SPOOFER EDWARD CROPPER shows us how Journalists Hold Tom Brady to Higher Standard Than Hillary.
You can see more of Mr. Cropper’s fine work HERE.
This Week’s Top Item On The Conservative Agenda
We now have six officially declared 2016 Republican Presidential Candidates and it will be interesting to see how many of they are following the Conservative Agenda’s Plan to win the White House.
The 2016 Elections will be about correcting ALL of Obama’s mistakes, and nominating Conservative Supreme Court Members will be a high priority, as the next 548 days will be the most important period in American History for a non-stop campaign against Political Correctness, the Devolution of American Culture, and the Liberal News Media. Congress and Kneepad Liberals in the Press continue to lie and say really stupid things without a smidgen of journalistic integrity to advance to Liberal Agenda.
And as The Blower so accurately predicted, news coverage continues to be Biased and Dishonest, with the same depth you see on all those inane Twitters and Entertainment Tonight shows to appeal to all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Voters Who Put Obama In The White House—Twice, and get all of their information from our Obama Supporters in the Press.
Meanwhile, other current items on The Conservative Agenda will just have to wait, including: Obama’s Leadership, The Clinton Legacy, Other Dishonest Democrats, Obama’s Secret Service, Biden’s Blunders, Obama Supporters In The Press, DemocRATS In Disarray, Polling For Trolls, Veterans, Racial Healing, Amnesty For Future DemocRATS, Baby Killing, and Making Sure Not To Hurt The Feelings Of All Those Murdering Muslim Bastards:
Racial Healing Update
How To Explain The Baltimore Riots In One Sentence
This Week’s Liberal Liars Award
goes to all of these these Really Stupid Hillary Supporters as they struggle to name any of her achievements.
Whistleblower War on Political Correctness
The Republican Journal says these are tough times for Conservatives. Political Correctness, that is, speaking and acting in a way that the left approves of, has become a required way of life for anyone interested in maintaining reputation, career and status in their community.
Being Politically Correct means always having to say you’re sorry, according to all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Voters Who Put Obama In The White House—Twice, and get all of their information from our Obama Supporters in the Press, who would rather ride to downtown Cincinnati on a bus and stand in line for three hours to vote, than mail in absentee ballots.
Now Here’s Today’s Politically Incorrect Joke: WLW Hate Radio Trash Talking Racist-in- Residence Bill Cunningham told us this one: “Q: Why did Obama get two terms? A: Because every Black man gets a longer sentence.”
The Feck Stops Here
Earlier this week, Metro Mole says The Fishwrap kept the pot boiling on their “Let’s All Feel Sorry For Convicted Ditzy DemocRAT Juvenile Court Judge Tracie Hunter” Story with a letter from one of Tracie’s Racist Supporters starting on with the requisite quote from Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. and claiming the poor misunderstood “African-American Judge Tracie Hunter has been done some grave injustices by elected officials in her state of Ohio. These injustices range from the prosecutor’s office in Cincinnati all the way up to the Ohio Supreme Court.”
It was so bad, Hamilton County Prosecutor “JayWalking Joe” Deters got suckered into writing a column pretending to be sorry for the convicted jurist because “she squandered a wonderful professional opportunity and turned it into a divisive and ugly situation.”
How dare those Feckless Fishwrappers ridicule the Old JayWalker that way. That’s The Blower’s job.
Meanwhile, our Feckless Fishwrappers will still be looking for more Liberal Causes to promote, as well as supporting Transgenders Just Looking for a Place to Pee, Over-Sexed Swingers in the Suburbs, Perverted Physicians, and Corpsefuckers at the Morgue, along with PC (If It’s Politically Correct, You Can’t Object), Tree Hugging, Keeping People From Smoking, Diversity Uber Alles, Unions Blues, Fanatical Feminists, Supporting Sodomy Rites, Global Warming: G-Uncontrol, Liberal Brainwashing In Schools, Voting Rights For People Who Are Too Stupid To Vote, Streetcars, Scalping the Washington Redskins, and Giving Away Free Stuff With Your Money.
But why should any of this surprise you? After all, don’t our Feckless Fishwrappers always say: It’s not Baseball, Mom, or Apple Pie that have always made our area great, it’s our “Disgraceful Diversity.”
Angry Andersonians
It ain’t over till it’s over. The stats are piled up against keeping on the team any Forest Hills school board member that runs for reelection.
The Forrest Gump School Board shouldn’t have hired “Smiling Dallas” Jackson in the first place. They shouldn’t have backed his levy that lavishes renovations on his own son’s school while flipping crumbs at the others. They shouldn’t have tried to cover up Jackson’s bullying and bending of rules to his own benefit that depressed morale. They shouldn’t have taken so long to get rid of him once the cover was blown and the truth came into the open.
Three strikes and you’re out, right? Not in this game. But this school board has had long enough. It’s time for somebody else to bat. Somebody who can hit rather than swing weakly only after the ball is in the catcher’s mitt then make excuses for missing the pitch.
Next board meeting, imagine them as awkward children playing T-Ball. It won’t be hard.
New team building starts this fall. It would be better if they followed their man Jackson and stepped down sooner.
Possible superintendent candidates include: Bryan Price (he would be The Fucking Superintendent), one of those guys just fired at Cincinnati SCPA, Randy Smith (I can’t run the school board, maybe I can run the schools), the Turpin teachers who blew the whistle on Jackson (a team approach), or The Whistleblower who’s always known more about what was going at the Forrest Gump schools than anybody.
In Northern Kentucky
BLUEGRASS BUREAU CHIEF KEN CAMBOO says most people really thought the last two weeks were going to be dull having to watch the 2015 Republican Gubernatorial Campaign between now and the Bluegrass Primary Elections on May 19. But some real down-and-dirty mudslinging started this week when our Feckless Fishwrappers reported from a Tuesday press conference and GOP Gubernatorial Candidate James Comer still now vehemently denying charges that he physically abused a girlfriend in college and drove her to have an abortion nearly 20 years ago, including saying he felt that the woman accusing him of physical abuse in college was offered money to come forward, while he offered no proof.
Lexington blogger Michael Adams (tied to Comer’s opponent’s campaign) published the allegations and sent them to the Courier Journal. (Both The Courier-Journal and The Fishwrap are both owned by Gannett.) Adams is being investigated by a Kenton County grand jury for allegedly threatening Comer’s running mate’s daughters over the internet.
Friday, another woman sent a one-paragraph letter to The Courier-Journal, admitting she didn’t see any physical confrontations but claiming she witnessed mental and emotional abuse by Comer 20 years ago. One of the comments to that story was: “Accusers of Republican candidates are 100% believable. Accusers of DemocRATS were discovered by, as James Carville put it, “Draggin’ a dollar bill through a trailer park.” Another comment from someone whose name you might recognize said: “Comer is the Bill Cosby of Kentucky Politics!”
And just to show The Blower is not above slinging a little bi-partisan sludge ourselves, our friends at the Kentucky Center for Investigative Reporting say there’s been a small development in a running lawsuit story: A Jefferson County judge last week refused to throw out a lawsuit alleging that Disgraceful DemocRAT fundraiser and Jack Conway campaign chairman, Nathan “Cornbread” Smith, the corporate owner of 17 Kentucky mobile home parks, illegally evicted residents, forcing them to abandon trailers that they owned. [READ MORE HERE]
More Politics Unusual
OUR LATE NIGHT TV JOKEWATCHER liked Jimmy Fallon’s: According to a new poll, 48 percent of Americans believe that Hillary Clinton is honest and trustworthy. Then Hillary said, “Actually I just made that poll up.” David Letterman said: Apparently there are incriminating texts and emails about what they call deflate-gate. Earlier today Hillary Clinton announced that she would be happy to delete them.”
THE LATEST POLLS: Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says a resounding 96% of adults surveyed said it was likely there would be additional racial disturbances this summer, a signal that Americans believe Baltimore’s recent problems aren’t a local phenomenon but instead are symptomatic of Obama’s wider national problems.
HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says today is National Railroad Day, because in 1869, the Golden Spike was driven at Promontory, Utah, completing the transcontinental rail line. Now maybe somebody could drive a spike through Mallory’s Trolley Folly boondoggle.
THAT’S WHY OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE chose Republicans for Higher Taxes “Cincinnati’s Trolley Folly through the killing fields of Over the Rhine will really make White people from the suburbs want to go downtown.”
LIBERAL LUNACY: In Human Events’ “365 Ways to Drive a Liberal Crazy,” #130 is an anagram: “President Barack Hussein Obama = A Democrat speaks inane rubbish.”
JOHN GALT says “Happiness is possible only to a rational man, the man who desires nothing but rational goals, seek nothing but rational values and finds his joy in nothing but rational actions. “
NOW HERE’S THE LATEST FROM BUNKY TADWELL (OUR ODIOUS OCTEGENARIAN), THE BARD OF CLEVES: Just in time for Mother’s Day Madness, we found this in his “I’ve Forgotten Mama,” found in better bookstores everywhere, except in Cleves.
There’ll soon be a day for your Mother
A day we treat like no other.
When she heard God’s voice
And then make her choice
She said, “You, I won’t bother to smother.”
IN LAST WEEK’S COLUMN FROM PATRONAGE COUNTY TITLED “Primary Concerns,” Muck Raker, political columnist for the Patronage County Innuendo, was interviewing our three Corrupt Commissioners from Patronage County about the results of Ohio’s Republican Primary Elections on May 5. This op-ed column never appeared at any time in the feisty Mt. Washington Press personally edited by eminently renowned publisher Dennis Nichols.
MEANWHILE, OUR OTHER MUCKRAKER says if you look around the United States at the various “loser” cities and notice they mostly all have one thing in common – they are run by DemocRAT (Liberals). Guess which city’s name should be included on that list.
WHISTLEBLOWER SENIOR BUSINESS EDITOR MERRILL FORBES reports MarketWatch says warning bells just keep getting louder and louder as the countdown to the Crash of 2016 keeps ticking. Wall Street’s in denial, but the Washington Post warns: “U.S. economic growth slows to 0.2 percent, grinding nearly to a halt.” USA Today hears “Bubble Talk” at the Vegas “Davos for Geeks.” Earlier the Wall Street Journal warned, “declining population could reduce global economic growth by 40%.” Then recently the “slow-growth Fed” was blamed.
THE FREE GRAIN PARTY still stands as the last refuge of anyone willing to help himself from the stores of others, and the Columbus Dispatch reports at the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs retail store in Ann Arbor, Michigan, Glenn Allen Bates, 57, admitted embezzling $150,000 for $500-plus a night for lap dances, particularly from a favorite named “Ashley,” at a Columbus strip club.
Cincinnati’s VA Secretary Robert A. McDonald must not be doing a very good job: While the veterans are not taken care of, bureaucRATS and a bevy of strippers surely are!
Free Grain Party Members include all DemocRATS, RINO Republicans, some TEA Partiers, quite a few Independents, disgruntled postal workers, senior citizens demanding free prescriptions, those who believe bigger government is the answer to all their problems, everybody who said “what Bill Clinton did was indefensible, but he shouldn’t be removed from office,” and those who think pork-barrel spending is OK as long as their district gets the money.
Unfortunately, that group probably doesn’t include all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters Who Put Obama In The White House—Twice, and get all of their information from our Obama Supporters in the Press.
FINALLY, AT YESTERDAY’S MEETING OF THE CONSERVATIVE AGENDA, Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane if there would be any profound Mother’s Day Message in The Blower this year. “That’s easy,” Kane explained. “It’s like what we always say whenever somebody asks what a home would be without a Mother, and we tell them that place would certainly be filthy!”
Plagiarism Count: Unattributed material was filched from a mere 742 different websites for the production of today’s Blower, many of our filches were from our friends at Weasel Zippers.
THE SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL
Although our campaign is not associated with the Failed United Way, your liberal guilt giving throughout the year still makes it all possible. 
SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL HOT LINE
e-mail your stories about worthy waifs today.
AND COMING UP IN “THE WEEK THAT WILL BE”:
Monday (May 11) we’ll featuring our Annual “Moms and MILFs” E-dition, as well as continuing to count down the 620 racially divided days for the rest of the nation remaining during the Dark Ages of Obama’s Second Term, unless the First Black President in History is impeached.
Tuesday (May 12) will reporting on how all those politicians were exploiting Mother’s Day this year, and “Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers” will be doing their best to criticize the worst offenders.
Wednesday (May 13) we’ll be checking to see if any of our Republicans have summoned up the courage to use the word “Impeachment.”
Thursday (May 14) we’ll be getting ready to celebrate Police Officer’s Memorial Day on Friday, which honors and remembers police officers who gave their lives while on duty.
The first line of Friday’s (May 15) limerick is: “The best way to spend Armed Forces Day.”
And Saturday (May 16) we’ll be we’ll honoring the military, while we check out to see which restaurants are offering free meals to veterans, or if we have to wait until Veterans Day for our free “Bloomin’ Onions” at Outback.
Remember:
We never print all the bad stuff we know and certain people ought to be damn glad we don’t, especially Ohio RINO Senator Rob “Fighting for Same-Sex Marriage” Portman, who’s trailing Former Gayvenor Strickland in the Polls. Award Winning Photo Illustrator Artis Conception shows Portman trying to explain why the United States is too self-assured that a major terrorist strike will not happen stateside.
WEEK IN REVIEW HOT LINE
e-mail your revolutionary recaps today
Some political score-keeping items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally political score-keeping subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more.
Whistleblower Video of the Week
Andrew Klavan: Obama’s Clown-Car Diplomacy
(Sent in by Whistleblower Faux Facebook Friend Bluegrass Political Activist Brian Richmond [1,453 Friends, 42 Mutual Friends, including Rick Robinson and Rob Sanders], who even has his Rob Sanders sticker tattooed on his chest.)
Note: We guarantee iPhone subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.
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