Special “Re-gifting Guide” E-dition

One of the best parts about publishing The Whistleblower Newswire is checking our e-mail first thing each morning to see some of those politically insightful items we’ve received from our equally politically insightful subscribers. Our readers’ comments are extremely helpful for our analysis and interpretation of today’s important top stories.

Thursday, December 11, 2014   

In Washington, They Re-gift Your Own Tax Money

  • image005GIFTS YOU CAN’T AFFORD: In Washington, our DC Newsbreaker says yesterday everybody was waiting to see if GOP House Speaker John Boehner and Bitch McConnell had totally caved in to Obama and Disingenuous DemocRATS in the Senate, just because they couldn’t wait to cave-in on a $1.1 trillion spending bill that would avert a partial government shutdown while delaying a fight over President Obama’s immigration actions until early 2015.

How many Lame Ducks does it take to pass a budget anyway? For sure,  all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters Who Put Obama In The White House—Twice, now have a country they truly deserve.

  • HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says on this date in 2000, Al Gore actually conceded the presidential election following weeks of legal battles over the recounting of votes in Florida, and in 1985 Ted “The Unabomber” Kaczynski killed his first victim. Let’s see which of those events out Kneepad Liberals in the Press recall today.
  • THAT’S WHY OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE chose Al Gore’s “During my service in the United States Congress, I took the initiative in creating Global Warming.”
  • TODAY’S LIBERALS TELL THE STUPIDEST LIES AWARD goes to Liar in Chief Obama, who hopes that his grandchildren are not subjected to “constant” racial biases that will make them feel as if America is not their home. That was only one of the lies Obama told in his extensive interview with BET about race relations, policing, Eric Garner, and Ferguson.

image009Meanwhile, there was still a way for Obsessive Obama Supporters like Tom and Rose to show their love for our Obamessiah during the Christmas Season. That’s why this limited edition “Obama Village Idiot” ornament for only $28.99 plus God only knows how much for shipping and handling, would look so great on your Obamamas Tree, as Obama Supporters in the Press continue to promise their millions of gullible followers today, it will still be just like “1,135 More Days of Christmas” during Obama’s second term. Proceeds will benefit Obama’s 2016 Third-Term Re-election Campaign.

  • image010LOCAL RACE CARD ALERT: Were the Hamilton County Demo-Labor Party Boss and those 55 other so-called “prominent” DemocRATS quilty of playing the race card, just because they pleaded with Judge Nadel for leniency and to let Convicted-and-Sentenced Black DemocRAT Ex-Juvie Judge Traci Hunter stay free pending her appeal, because they believed jailing a black judge would send an awful message, especially given the current national racial climate? Obama and Race-Baiter #1 Al Sharpton would’ve been so proud.

CH Snitch at 1000 Main Street, who is obviously racist, says Judge Hunter should have no problem complying with the Ohio Supreme Court’s order not to practice law, because it’s not like she ever practiced law in the first place!

image013Most people are surprised we haven’t seen any Traci Hunter Riots, but according to the Counter on the front page of the Whistleblower Newswire, we still have about two more weeks of looting till Kwanzaa.

  • ANOTHER STUPID STREETCAR SCREWUP: Cincinnati’s City Clown-cil’s “Stupid Streetcar Savings Account” is running out of money to pay for cost overruns and surprise expenses nearly two years before the rail line is up and running. Maybe The Fishwrap could help sell a few more Early Streetcar Passes to raise the money.  Or if the city would extend those cards to include “rides” from the ladies (and gents) of pleasure strolling the route of the streetcar, they might have a real idea.  One ride or one pickup at any stop on the route.  Add a few “pleasure cars” and you’ve got a real enterprise going.  “Double your pleasure. Roll and blow.” “Get a real ‘feel’ for the city.”  “Life is fine on Vine.”  Those unlimited cards would be the first ones gone.

Meanwhile, Award Winning Photo Illustrator Artis Conception caught up with the Stupid Streetcar Six (Clown-cil Members Flynn Flam” are Clown-cil Gay Chris Squealback, P.G. Sittenfeld, Yvette Simpson, and Wendell Young, along with Vice Mayor David Mann) ON Race Street for their reaction.

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  • TAILGATING TROUBLEMAKER TINO DELGATO says this month’s foot in mouth award does not go to an athlete or politician. It goes to Bengal Head Coach Marvin Lewis. On the eve week of playing the Browns in Cleveland Marvin decided to infuriate the Browns starting Quarterback Johnny Manziel by calling him a midget. The Browns beat the Bengals 24-3 November 6th in Cincinnati. Marvin is tired of losing that first playoff game the last three years, but he probably won’t have to worry about that this year.   Go Figure!!!
  • IN ANDERSON: Why did Anderson Trustee President “In Russ We Trust Jackson,” TEA Party Trustee Andy Pappas, and Forrest Gump School Tax Hike Scammer Trustee Josh Gerth ignore the pleas of all those Anderson Cable TV Supporters when they were paraded up to the podium last month, begging for the Trustees not to close the Anderson Cable TV station that nobody really watches? Do you think somebody’s told the Trustees what they look like during those “Trustee Talk” interview programs?

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WHISTLEBLOWER HOLIDAY GIFT GUIDE:

This seems to be a pretty good gift for your favorite elected official.

  • image019JUST IN TIME FOR THE HOLIDAYS: K-Mart announced a new shipment of Chabotheads has just arrived.

But for those who are planning to join Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane and Revered Former Congressman Bob McEwen attending Mean Jean” Schmidt’s Christmas Party at the Schmidt Run Estates at 771 Wards Corner Road, where the disgraced former U.S. Congresswoman plans to announce her return to politics, let’s all sing the sixth verse of “Mean Jean Schmidt’s Twelve Days of Christmas,” sent in by Clermont County Crony-in-Chief “Buffalo Dave” Uible, along with this picture of Tim Rudd, who always said, “It never matters who wants our endorsement, since all the votes have already been counted.” It went something like this:

image021On the Sixth Day of Christmas, “Mean Jean” gave to me,
Six Crooked Cronies,
Five Libelous Liars,
Four Screeching Tires,
Three Borgman Cartoons,
Two Red Dresses,
And One Old Crapper, from Rob Portman’s Legacy.

Kind of warms the cockles of your heart, doesn’t it Portman?

  • Now here’s an update on that Company Christmas Party you’ve been reading about in The Blower:

image023FROM: Terri Bishop, Acting Human Resources Director
DATE: December 12
RE: Patty Lewis and the Holiday Party

            I’m sure I speak for all of us in wishing Patty Lewis a speedy recovery from her stress-related illness and I’ll continue to forward your cards to her at the sanitarium. In the meantime, management has decided to cancel our Holiday Party and give everyone the afternoon of the December 23 off with full pay.

Happy Holidays!

  • image024NoKY NEWS: Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo said last year when he called the Adams County (Ohio) Travel and Visitors Bureau in Ohio, to get directions to those Amazing Amish Christmas Lights near Squirrel Town, it reminded him to tell readers that Rick “The Bat Boy” Robinson now has his pet squirrel “Nutsy” tastefully decorated for Christmas.
  • image026MORE HOLIDAY MAGIC: Another Holiday Party Rick never misses is the Annual World Orgasm for Peace Day Orgy at the Fort Mitchell County Club, co-sponsored by Uptight Bitches in Ft. Mitchell and the Northern Kentucky Cougars’ Association. That godless pagan event is on December 21, just in time for Druids to celebrate the Winter Solstice. Two years ago Marvin the Mayan said he’d like to come too, because if the world did actually come to an end on December 21, he’d like to go out with a gang bang. Then everybody watch  “Getting into the Holiday Spirit with Eric and Nicole, just in case you’ve fogtten who they are.”
  • image045FINALLY, AT YESTERDAY’S MEETING OF THE CONSERVATIVE AGENDA, Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane about the way we keep finding out how much race relations have become since Obama came president.  “Only 9% of Americans think race relations have improved,” Kane explained, all of which does not bode well for the next 770 days of Dishonesty and Division for America remaining during the Dark Ages of Obama’s Second Term, unless the First Black President in History is impeached. IS CFK a prophet or what!

Finally, IS IT CHRISTMAS YET?


The Seediest Kids of All

The Butch LeDeux Story

         image027Butch LaDeux was a very troubled 11-year-old second-grader who was not doing well in school, even by the Forrest Gump School District’s standards. The truth is, Butch is illiterate, and he always tries to cover up his feelings of inferiority by punching little kids in the stomach and stealing their lunch money.

So the Seediest Kids of All (not associated with the Failed United Way) enrolled Butch at O’Brien’s Gym so he could channel his aggressive energy and Bungals Bar-Fighter Rey Maualuga taught Butch how to blindside his opponents.

Butch still beats up little kids for their lunch money, but instead of punching them in the stomach, he takes clean shots to the head and face as he goes after them because their parents had dared to put “Vote No” signs against the school levy in their front yards.

The LaDeux family is no longer on welfare, due to the substantial amount of money Butch now brings home every week. They’re grateful to the Seediest Kids of All, but it’s really you they have to thank, because it’s your liberal guilt throughout the year which makes it all possible.   

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SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL HOT LINE

e-mail your stories about worthy waifs today.


More Proud Sponsors and Avid Fans

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Today’s edition is brought to you by a generous “in-kind” donation during our December fund-raising drive by the Scrooge and Marley’s Counting House.


OFFICE PARTY HOT LINE

e-mail your extortion photos today

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Some party-crashing items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally party-crashing subscribers. 


Whistleblower Politically Incorrect Video of the Day

OBAMA’S BLACK SKIN PRIVILEGE

image033Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.


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