Souvenir “2014 Ohio Primary Election” E-dition

Wednesday, May 7, 2014

We’re Still Staying Around

  • Hurley the Historian says The Whistleblower Newswire came out of retirement twenty-two years ago last November.
  • image005The day after Election Day ’92, we had to return. After witnessing an endless barrage of biased reporting and the unmitigated mess the news media made of Campaign ’92, the results of that year’s elections were not all that surprising.
  • The voters in ’92, 95% of whom learned all they knew by watching daily distortions on local and national TV newscasts, sent to the White House, a draft-dodging, tax-evading, dope-smoking, pants-dropping, wife-cheating liar whom we predicted would surely drag this nation down to the level of Arkansas.
  • America got a leader it truly deserved –more arrogant than JFK, fewer scruples than LBJ, rivaling the Carter-Mondale administration for sheer stupidity.
  • image007The Devolution of American has continued unabated as this nation marches toward the abyss, and will continue for at least the next 989 days during the Dark Ages of Obama’s Second Term, unless the First Black President in History is impeached.
  • We’d only planned to stay around for a short time. But even after 7,854 days (but who’s counting?) of penetrating reporting, scathing commentary, and shining the light of truth on liars and deceivers, our Kneepad Liberals in the Press (especially Skaggie Maggie and her Feckless Fishwrappers) still don’t get it. Their coverage of the Indecision 2014’s Ohio Primary has been just as lazy, stupid, and dishonest. Analysis of last night’s election returns in our Special Whistleblower Insiders E-dition proves it.
  • image009Voters had not yet learned what those Loony Libertarians always say, that a vote for the lesser of two evils is still a vote for evil, and people who don’t stand for something will fall for anything, because no matter the outcome, you should never ever vote for a candidate you don’t really believe in. No wonder yesterday’s turnout was expected to be historically low. All those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Voters Who Put Obama In The White House—Twice certainly weren’t standing in line to vote this time. American Voters’ Ignorance and Apathy were indeed overwhelming. So few people actually voted, TEA Party Patriots could rule, if they would only get off their fat asses and find their precincts. This election was shaping up to be “low hanging fruit” if the people would’ve only shown up.
  • Left-wing lunatics always predict The Whistleblower will cease to exist after every Election Day, and once again this year, that prophecy did not come true. image011Our Quote for Today Committee says according to Mark Twain, “Reports of our death have been greatly exaggerated,” and as Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane told Political Insiders at today’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda, and now with 181 more days until the November Elections, it looks as if we’re going to have to stick around for just a little while longer.

You have only yourselves to blame.
We’re going to do it until they get it right.

So perhaps it’s time once again for Our Beloved Whistleblower Motto (Let’s all say it together):

Because wherever there’s corruption, we’ll be there.
Wherever there’s injustice, we’ll be there.
And wherever there’s a bunch of big guys beating up on a little guy, we’ll be there too…holding the little guy down. And that goes double for RINOs.

image016Remember: We never print all the bad stuff we know and certain people ought to be damn glad we don’t, especially lazy, stupid, and dishonest members of the news media.


image012My Statement of Principles

I will provide the people of the tri-state with a publication that will tell the news honestly.

I will also provide them with a fighting and tireless champion of their rights as citizens and as human beings.

Signed
Charles Foster Kane


FRAUD AT POLLS HOT LINE

e-mail your sleazy sightings today. 

image013

Some dead voter items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally dead voter subscribers.


WHISTLEBLOWER LINK OF THE DAY

Monty Python’s Election Night Special

image015 (Sent in by Faux Facebook Friend Bobby Leach [257 Friends, 11 Mutual Friends], who showed up at work without his “I Voted” sticker saying “I also farted, but they didn’t give me a sticker for that.”)

image016Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.


Current Whistleblower Policies and Disclaimers can be found here 

image017