Special “Symbolic Shutdown” E-dition

One of the best parts about publishing The Whistleblower Newswire is checking our e-mail first thing each morning to see some of those politically insightful items we’ve received from our equally politically insightful subscribers. Our readers’ comments are extremely helpful for our analysis and interpretation of today’s important top stories. 

Thursday, October 3, 2013

Vets Take DC War Memorial Just Like Omaha Beach

  • image005Tuesday an “Honor Flight” of our proud WWII and Korean War Veterans were in DC to see their memorials. The guards said the memorials were closed because of Obama’s Partial Government Shutdown. The chaperones and whell chair pushers told the guards to shove it, removed the “Barrycades,” and took their Vets to see the memorials anyway. With Republican Congressmen leading the charge, some of the Vets must have wondered what the hell they had fought and died for.
  • Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus says yesterday The Blower pointed out Obama Supporters in the Press couldn’t stop obsessing over Tuesday’s Government Shutdown, even though it was only a “Slimdown” not a real Shutdown. But the real story two days ago was the ObamaCare Lunch Disaster. Wall Street even shrugged off Obama’s “Shutdown” Tuesday when it reclaimed half of Monday’s Shutdown Scare Losses, but the DemocRAT-controlled Senate didn’t shut down so they could vote to keep their illegal ObamaCare Subsidy.

shutdown wally worldTuesday after Obama and the Disingenuous DemocRATS shut down the Government, we were expecting to see such headlines as “Republicans Shut Down Government, Nation Descends into Riots, Looting, and Cannibalism.” But Obama Supporters in the Press were forced to spend their time reporting all those ObamaCare failures on Shutdown Day. No wonder Obama supporters were so tight-lipped about the myriad of enrollment problems and the Obama Administration wouldn’t release the number of new Obamacare enrollees on opening day, while Twitter was exploding with tweets from disappointed Obama voters who woke up Tuesday morning and realized that instead of getting “affordable healthcare,” they would instead have to pay a fee for not having insurance.

  • shutting downYesterday on the second day of Obama’s Partial Government Shutdown, Obama and DemocRAT Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid blinked, and Obama ordered Congressional leaders to attend a meeting at the White House. Harry Reid and DemocRAT House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi along with Republican House Speaker John Boehner and Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell were all “invited to attend.” During the meeting, Obama intended to issue his red line demand that Republicans in the House pass his clean CR to reopen the government, raise the debt ceiling immediately, or else.
  • In Russia, The Blower’s New Cyber-Spy Columnist Edward Snowden reports allegedly off-the-record that Russian President “Bad Vlad” Putin said, “Negotiating with Obama is like playing chess with a pigeon. The pigeon knocks over all the pieces, shits on the board, and then struts around like it won the game.”
  • MORE ASTUTE ANAYLSIS: Obama has granted waivers, exemptions, and delays to his cronies, allies, and contributors. Now The Blower wonders why those same delays, waivers, and exemptions to this “fantastic” law shouldn’t be good for all Americans. 

Ohio’s First District Congressman Steve Chabothead says, “Obama Administration Spinners are calling all of those major failures on ObamaCare’s Opening Day, mere ‘glitches’ in an attempt to minimize the debacle.”

What else did they expect, after three years of hype, that nobody would sign up for free health care on the first day? So the bottom line is, do we trust these people to control something so critical as our healthcare? I don’t think so.

Obama is using his Partial Government Shutdown like he used going to war against Syria– to distract from his many other failures and scandals.

  • CROOKS IN CONGRESS: Former Nevada power broker Harvey Whittemore admitted he was “arrogant and naive” but insisted “I’m not greedy” before a judge sentenced him Monday to two years in prison for funneling more than $130,000 in illegal campaign funds to Disgraceful DemocRAT Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid’s re-election committee in 2007.
  • image010OUR LATE NIGHT TV JOKEWATCHER says says comedians could hardly wait to ridicule Obama’s Partial Shutdown. Jay Leno said, “How many are worried about a government shutdown? How many are more worried about it starting back up?” Conan O’Brien said, “The federal government has shut down, and 800,000 federal employees are out of work. That explains why tonight our entire studio audience is made up of park rangers and astronauts.” David Letterman said, “Almost a million non-essential government employees were let go. Well, isn’t that the problem, that there’s that many non-essential employees?” And Craig Ferguson said, “Right now more than 800,000 government employees are no longer getting paid. Don’t worry. Every single member of Congress still gets paid. You are right to hiss and boo, my friends.”
  • MORE MEDIA MALPRACTICE: Was the Dissociated Press in on the scam when a partisan government union big-wig pretended to be a beleaguered government employee facing furlough due to a government shutdown, or did they know the scammer was an activist and withheld that information from their readers?
  • image012THE CINCINNATI MESS (You’ll only read about in The Blower): Some Cincinnati Police Officers found Carrie Blackmore Smith’s puff piece interesting about new Cincinnati Police Chief Jeffrey Blackwell’s willingness to listen to his advisors about what changes needed to be made at the CPD. Which is probably a good thing, since how would he ever know that change is necessary in an agency when one knows absolutely nothing about the agency, the community, the city, the people, the culture, or the personnel he’s now supposed to be managing. Such assumptions with no specific information or hard evidence is simply a recipe for bullshit! Forming a committee to learn what is necessary to change with a commitment to listen is another way of saying, “I don’t have a clue what I’ve inherited or what to do with it!”  The Blower remembers when Ron Twitty (who left the Cincinnati Police Department amid scandal in 2004) being quoted in The Fishwrap after being fired telling all, “I’m working on a plan!”  This was in reference to the then rising tide of violence in the city.  No specific information or concrete examples of a plan were offered, but the media anxiously awaited the positive results.  Well…Citizens of Cincinnati are still waiting for “the plan” though it’s only been ten years now.  This will be much the same until something controversial occurs. Then the blame game will begin anew!  Disgraced Former Fourteen-Star Police Chief James Craig blamed difficulties on previous administrations.  Sound familiar?  You’ll hear it again!
  • image014SODOMY RITES UPDATE: Ben Dover and Phil McKrevis were giddy after reading Tuesday’s Gay Gram from Out-and-Proud Cincinnati Clown-cil Gay Chris Squealback’s Equally Out-and-Proud Gay Partner Craig Schultz, asking our Whistleblower Alternate Life-Styles Contributors for a small donation to help Chris cross the finish line. The Blower bets Craig helps Chris to cross the old “finish line” every chance he gets, if you know what we mean. 
  • image016UNITED APPALL PEOPLE: Several times a week, alcoholic bartender Paul Puddler visits the John Gilligan Adult Diaper Replacement Clinic for People Who Can’t Stop Leaking, another one of the seemingly endless United Appall Agencies supposedly serving some of the area’s more unfortunate citizens, but mainly providing a paycheck to someone who couldn’t get a real job. Paul hopes the United Appall meets this week’s fundraising goal so he can continue to pick up his daily supply Depends. “I just want to be loved and dry,” says Paul. “Is there anything wrong with that?
  • WHISTLEBLOWER SENIOR SPOILED SPORTS EDITOR ANDY FURBALL says just as The Blower predicted, Dusty’s Little Red Machine had a total shut down during Tuesday night’s One-and-Done Wild Card Playoff Appearance, and according to The Blower’s Countdown Counter at the lower right hand corner of this page, the next Reds home game on TV will be Opening Day on March 31, 2014.

And with apologies to Ernest Thayer, “Somewhere the sun is shining, somewhere the children shout, but will be no joy in Reds Land, Until Dusty Baker’s $3 Million 2014 Contract has run out.”

  • image019WHISTLEBLOWER INTERNS Rachel, Bradley, Ashley, and Hunter say 22 years ago, when The Whistleblower used to be printed and delivered all over town, Issue # 71 published on September 24, 1991 including an item where then Cincinnati Mayor David Mann used Yiddish to smear his opponents.  
  • IN ANDERSON: For weeks The Blower has been calling attention to The Forest Hills Urinal’s cover-up of their endorsed candidate Disgraced Township Trustee Kevin “Big Spanky” O’Brien’s Capital One lawsuit, the lawsuit by the guy who unfortunately bought Kevin’s house, Kevin’s impending bankruptcy, and the latest lawsuit filed September 4 by his former best friend Greg Delev in Probate Court on behalf of Emily Teeter Wright, accusing Whacky Jackie O’Brien’s Illegitimate Son Kevin of stealing money from her father’s trust fund. Luckily for Kevin, when Lisa Wakeland finally got around to covering the story, it was buried on Wednesday’s front page where Anderson Residents have become accustomed not to look for any important township political news. Lisa missed Judge Cheryl Grant’s summary judgment ruling for Capital One against Kevin “Spanky” O’Brien in the amount of $6,306.34 and accruing interest at 3%.

Also missing in the Gannett Farm Team’s so-called complete coverage was any word about watching Republican Endorsed Township Trustee Candidate Andy Pappas’s latest video ad ushering in a new chapter in Anderson Leadership. It’s even better than Andy’s first and second videos.

  • IN CLERMONT COUNTY: Want to find John Becker? The State Rep-tile with be having lunch as Chippy Gerhardt’s special guest in a private room on the second floor of McCormick & Schmick’s overlooking Fountain Square in Downtown Cincinnati with Lobbyist Endorsed Cincinnati Vice Mayor and Mayoral Candidate Foxy Roxy Qualls as their special guest. How does The Blower know such things? Becker announced his whereabouts in his newsletter sent only to contributors and one forwarded it to us. Becker is not the only elected official that will be there getting a free lobbyist-paid lunch.  Most of them will be there but at least they are smart enough not to tell the world their intentions. Becker, not so much. Some would say this is a breath of fresh air.  Whistleblower readers would call it “Stupidity.”
  • HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says on this date in 1995, O.J. Simpson was wrongly acquitted of the brutal 1994 double murder of his estranged wife, Nicole Brown Simpson, and her friend, Ronald Goldman. Obama’s Clueless Attorney General no doubt agreed with that verdict. He, however, did not agree with two Federal Judges in Washington DC. The first slapped down his motion to dismiss and told him to quit filing spurious arguments in that Constitutional lawsuit filed by the House of Representatives to hold him in contempt and require him to provide all those documents and truthful testimony about his Fast and Furious plan to give Mexican drug lords free guns. The second slap down came in his request to delay the trial in the US Air/American Airlines Merger Case, where that Federal Judge told him the case was going to trial in three months whether he had money to pay lawyers or not.
  • image020BRAINWASHING LIBERALS: Several letters to The Fishwrap echoed The Fishwrap’s lead claiming “ObamaCare is the Law of the Land,” which is rapidly becoming the preferred shorthand argument for why any criticism of ObamaCare is mean-spirited and racist. It also serves to introduce a laughable larger claim that any and all attempts to overturn Obama’s UnAffordable Care Act are actually symptoms of extremist TEA-bagging right-wing terrorism.

But wasn’t the Fugitive Slave Act also once the Law of the Land? So was the Defense of Marriage Act. And we’re sure today’s Liberals would never argue those Laws of the Land were overturned by anarchists.

  • IN NORTHERN KENTUCKY: Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says as predicted, The Fishwrap is dispensing its Daily Dose of ObamaCare Shutdown Spin, still trying to convince people to give ObamaCare a chance because “it’s the law,” although most Americans oppose it.

One person who can’t stop using that tired old Law of the Land ObamaCare argument is Col Owens. The Kenton County DemocRAT Chairman says Republicans will bear the brunt of the blame for Obama Partial Shutdown, and will help Secretary of State Alison Wondergams Grimes win Senate Minority Leader Bitch McConnell’s Senate seat in 2014.

Obama’s Partial Shutdown of the Federal Government in Greater Cincinnati means thousands of Rogue IRS Agents in Southwest Ohio and Northern Kentucky will now have to harass TEA Party Members illegally on their own time. Covington’s Mayor Sherry Carran says she isn’t sure how it will affect her 4,000-5,000 IRS employees in Covington, but only 9% of Obama’s IRS workers showed up to work Tuesday nationally.

  • image021FINALLY, AT YESTERDAY’S MEETING OF THE CONSERVATIVE AGENDA, Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane why The Blower published that Special Media Advisory on this date in 2010. “Back then,” Kane explained, “for the previous several days The Blower had been predicting KimBall Perry’s story would appear in The Fishwrap about Northern Kentucky Loudmouth Attorney Eric “Call Me Crazy” Deters’ frivolous fool-for-a-client law suit against The Blower. And apparently on that date, it had happened.

    Undoubtedly that’s why our Quote for Today Committee chose Deters’ quote: “The guy deserves to be kicked in the gonads and I’m going to do it. He’s a nasty person and I’m not going to sleep until I get him.”

“Bring in on,” The Blower said.


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Today’s edition is brought to you by a generous “in-kind” donation during our October fund-raising drive from John Gilligan Adult Diaper Replacement Clinic for People Who Can’t Stop Leaking.


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