Daily Archives: January 6, 2013

Special “The Week That Was” E-dition

Sunday, January 6, 2013

The Blower’s Week in Review

  • image006OUR NUMBER STORY THIS WEEK was DemocRAT Senate Leader Harry Reid and Republican Minority Leader Bitch McConnell agreed to work on a deal last weekend to avoid sending American over that “Fiscal Cliff” and McConnell couldn’t wait to surrender.
  • OUR NUMBER TWO STORY THIS WEEK was when when all those Conservatives got outraged about the so-called “Fiscal Cliff” fix approved late Tuesday by the John Boehner’s supposedly Republican controlled House when they voted on that Crap Sandwich Fiscal Bill Obama’s Bitch McConnell sent over from the Senate.
  • AND OUR NUMBER THREE STORY THIS WEEK was when Weeper of the House John Boehner got to keep his gavel so he could cave in to Obama again on the next budget battle. Boehner said his New Year’s Resolution was not to negotiate with Obama any more. Yeah, right!

Only in Washington DC can 536 individuals sit around debating a set of alternatives that at best would bring in enough revenue to cover nine days of deficit and contain no actual reduction in spending!

Maybe that’s why our Quote for Today Committee chose Ronald Reagan’s “We don’t have a trillion-dollar debt because we haven’t taxed enough; we have a trillion-dollar debt because we spend too much.”

Still, Obama claims raising taxes to cut the deficit is a “balanced” approach. Americans for Tax Reform’s Grover Norquist says, “Raising Taxes isn’t compromise.”

  • image008MONDAY in our Special “New Year’s Eve” E-dition, The Blower said, “Just Say No to New Year’s Resolutions” and brought you the Top Ten Ways you know it’s about time for 2012 to be over:

10. Obama finally emerges from his $4 Million over-taxed payer funded family Cliff-mas vacation in Hawaii (with borrowed money) for more political theatre over attempts to avoid sending America over that “Fiscal Cliff,” DemocRAT Senate Leader Harry Reid and Republican Minority Leader Bitch McConnell agree to appear to work on a deal through the weekend, and everybody’s waiting for GOP Speaker of the House John Boehner to cave.

9. The nation reaches its $16.394 Trillion Debt Ceiling.

8. Ohio RINO Party Boss Boob Bennett asks for more money to help “keep up the momentum” that turned the Buckeye State “Blue” in November.

7. Criminals all over Hamilton County are ready to go a-ridin’ into town, a whampin’ and whompin’ every livin’ thing that moves within an inch of its life as soon as Sheriff Simon Leis is out of office.

6. Cincinnati’s Dainty DemocRAT Mayor Mark Mallory and his new Extreme Liberal City Clown-cil plan to continue to tax-and-spend like when Obama controlled both Houses of Congress in 2009.

5. Forest Hills Urinal Editor Eric Spangler publishes 52nd 2012 e-dition covering up for incompetent and dishonest local elected officials.

4. Ohio Second District Congressman-Elect “Bronze Star Brad” Wenstrup’s Inexperienced and Incompetent Transition Team contracts for a brand new District Office, but won’t tell anybody where it is.

3. Eric “Call Me Crazy, Big Mouth, Most Sanctioned, Ambulance Chaser, No Count of a Radio Host, Shameless Self Promoter, Willie Wannabe, Why Haven’t I Been Disbarred, Who Likes Bulldogs and Failed Roadhouse Operator” Deters files his final frivolous lawsuit for 2012.

2. Politicians’ last-minute e-mails remind you that you only have a few more hours to send in your 2012 contributions before the end of the year.

image009…and the Number One Way you know it’s about time for 2012 to be over is… Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane just finished this year’s list of his political predictions that came true, so now it’s time for the Whistleblower New Year’s Eve Party to begin.

[READ MORE HERE]

  • image010TUESDAY in our Special “No Deal in DC” E-dition,The Blower said, “Happy Tax Hikes, Everybody!” and “Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers” included:

Here’s our First Official Prediction for 2013: GOP House Speaker John Boehner will be blamed for the failure to avoid sending America over that “Fiscal Cliff.” —Whistleblower Political Prognosticator Nostradamus Tadwell

You saw how serious Obama was about avoiding the Fiscal Cliff when he left the negotiations to Vice President Joke Biden. —Late Night TV Jokewatchers

There’s no cause for alarm. Obama just signed our pay raises. —Clueless in Congress

For not caving in before the New Year’s Eve deadline, will The Blower still be endorsing me when the Republican Caucus selects is new Speaker on Thursday? —John Boehner

Didn’t anybody notice when government borrowing reached its$16.394 Trillion Debt Limit on Monday? —Obama’s Treasury Secretary “Turbotax Timmy” Geithner

See-nothing really bad happened when the country went over that Fiscal Cliff at midnight. So now when do we get some more free stuff? —Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span Obama Voters

Only in Washington, DC can 536 individuals sit around debating a set of alternatives that at best would bring in enough revenue to cover a few days of deficit and contain no actual reduction in spending, and still claim they’re doing a good job. —Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus

[READ MORE HERE]

  • image012WEDNESDAY in our Special “Joke Fiscal Crisis Bill” E-dition,The Blower said Republicans can’t wait to raise taxes!

Congress missed its chance to beat the Dreaded Fiscal Cliff Deadline Monday night, when no deal had been reached by the time the ball dropped in Times Square.

Republican Senate Minority Leader Bitch McConnell totally wussed out by agreeing with Obama’s Vice President Joke Biden to turn back the GOP’s two-decade-long refusal to raise tax rates and delivering a major win for Obama

Such a deal! Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus says the bill has $620 billion in new tax hikes, and only $15 billion in spending cuts. Get out your calculators: That’s $41 in new taxes for every $1 in spending cuts. No wonder the Senate couldn’t pass it until 2 AM when “Rob “Fighting for Fixes” Portman and a lot of Republicans caved in big time. That bill passed 89-8. Bluegrass Senator Rand Paul voted against it.

The measure would raise taxes by about $600 billion over 10 years and only delay for two months all those across-the-board spending cuts otherwise set to begin slashing the budgets of the Pentagon and numerous domestic agencies. So the problem is, the Fiscal Cliff is still there, and Congress will be back at it again in March, and there’ll be another showdown all over again.

Actually, the so-called “fiscal cliff” deal that was designed to save money actually includes $330.3 billion in new spending over the next decade, according to the official estimate the Congressional Budget Office released Tuesday afternoon.

[READ MORE HERE]

  • image013THURSDAY, in our Special “Bye, Bye Boehner” E-dition, The Blower because nothing had really been fixed.

JUST AS THE WHISTLEBLOWER PREDICTED: Plenty of Conservatives are couldn’t be more outraged about the so-called “Fiscal Cliff” fix approved late Tuesday by the John Boehner’s supposedly Republican controlled House when they voted on that Crap Sandwich Fiscal Bill Obama’s Bitch McConnell sent overt from the Senate. Photoshop Spoofer Edward Cropper shows our Crap Sandwich Supreme. After all, Ohio Republican Senator Rob “Fighting for Fecal Burgers” Portman had claimed he won’t go for a deal that had more spending, with no deficit reduction, and he voted just like Ohio’s Disingenuous DemocRAT Senator Sherrod Brown.

The Senate received the 154-page bill only three minutes before they voted to approve it. That reminds us when Nutty Nancy Pelosi said the House had to vote for Obama care so they could find out what’s in it, and we all know how well that turned out.

Obama left town without even signing the legislation, hoping on Air Force One to resume his $7 Million over-taxed payer funded family Cliff-mas vacation in Hawaii (with borrowed money).

Maybe that’s why our Quote for Today Committee chose Herbert Hoover’s “Blessed are the young, for they shall inherit the national debt.”

[READ MORE HERE]

  • image015FRIDAY in our Special “What Could Be Worse Than Obama’s Second Term” E-dition, The Blower said, “Would Be Another Term for John Boehner as Speaker”:

HURLEY THE HISTORIAN said on this date in 1995, the 104th Congress became the first held entirely under Republican control since the Eisenhower era. Thanks to Newt Gingrich and his “Contract with America,” the Republican Party won majority control of Congress for the first time in forty years. Today, everybody was waiting to see Weeper of the House John Boehner getting to keep his gavel so he can cave in to Obama again on the next budget battle. Boehner said his New Year’s Resolution was not to negotiate with Obama any more. No kidding! At least Goof Doofus’ replacement, Tea Party guy Thomas Massie was one of the nine defections.

According to Dick Morris in “The Uselessness of a Republican House,” The way the House rolled over and passed the DemocRAT/ Liberal fiscal cliff “deal” was not the only disgusting sight in Washington this New Year’s Day. Even worse was the craven way the Republican Congressmen embraced DemocRAT tactics by voting against the bill only when they were certain that it would pass despite their votes. In his Video Lunch Alert “Profiles in Cowardice: House Republicans,” Morris discusses how the “Fiscal Cliff” deal was no compromise. It was a total surrender.

[READ MORE HERE]

  • image018SATURDAY in our Special “She’s Finally Gone” E-dition, The Blower asked, “Whose idea was she anyhow?”

Thursday evening at the Conservative Agenda, there was sort of a celebration on the final day of That Lame-Duck, Corrupt, Evicted, Lying, Plagiarizing, Meddling, Overblown, Bought-And-Paid-For, Tax-And-Spend, Wrinkle-Puss RINO Bitch-In-A-Ditch Mean Jean Schmidt’s time in Congress. The Blower had only been on Mean Jean’s case almost daily since 2005.

In 2006, The Blower accurately predicted The Whistleblower’s nickname for “Mean Jean” Schmidt would be used on at least 48,311 occasions by the New York Times and others in the national press, as That Lying Plagiarizing Bitch became the most embarrassing elected official in Southwestern Ohio history (including Jerry Springer), flushing Rob “Fighting for Family Fortunes” Portman’s legacy totally down the crapper for having chosen “Mean Jean” to succeed him. Award-Winning Photo Illustrator Artis Conception captured that fateful moment.

[READ MORE HERE]

Seediest Kids of All

The Mikey Brown Story

image020Today’s Seediest Kid of All is Poor Little Mikey Brown, a portly pantload from Indian Hill, who wanted to win the Punt, Pass, and Kick Competition to please his dad, who was a real football fanatic. Poor Little Mikey dreamed of standing at mid-field during halftime, where a stadium full of fans would cheer him, and everybody else at home would see him on TV.

So the Seediest Kids of All sent over some professional football coaches, who taught him everything they knew.

Unfortunately, at the Punt, Pass, and Kick Competition, Poor Little Mikey’s punt went a total of six yards, he fumbled the ball attempting to pass, and he tripped over the tee when he tried to kick the ball. On second thought, maybe we shouldn’t have sent over the Bungals coaching staff. At least he didn’t embarrass himself in front of a stadium full of people, because the stands were empty, and since it was a Bungals home game, nobody saw it at home because as usual, the game was blacked out on TV.

The Brown family called to express their gratitude to for all our help, but it’s really you they have to thank, because it’s your guilt and tax dollars throughout the year which make it all possible.

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SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL HOT LINE

e-mail your stories about worthy waifs today. 

  • image021DEBT DEBACLE: While hitting the links (round 113) at a luxurious Hawaiian resort,Obama warned the United States could not afford further budget showdowns this year or in the future. Obama’s vacations in Hawaii since becoming president have only cost over-taxed payers $20 million in borrowed money so far.
  • BOEHNER’S BACK: Newly re-elected Republican House Speaker John Boehner says he’s learned his lesson and his First New Year’s Resolution is not to negotiate with Obama any more, wouldn’t promising to fight harder in the upcoming Debt Ceiling Debate be just a little redundant.
  • TEA PARTY PATRIOTS say people are mad as hell, declaring they have “no confidence” in the Republican Party, after GOP lawmakers agreed to higher taxes but no broad spending cuts as part of a deal to avert the “fiscal cliff.” “Anybody that voted ‘yes’ in the House should be concerned” about primary challenges in 2014.”
  • MESSAGE FOR JOHN BOEHNER: Our Anderson Tea Party Patriots said it best: “As long as Speaker John Boehner and Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell are the face of the Republican Party and are running the Republican show on Capitol Hill, the Republican brand is dead.” [READ MORE HERE]
  • THAT’S WHY OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE CHOSE Obama’s “The best is yet to come.”
  • THE LATEST POLLS: Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says, the week began with a so-called “fiscal cliff” deal that surprised no one and earned mixed reviews. DemocRATS like it; Republicans don’t. And nobody expects government spending to go down as a result. What was it we said about getting a government we deserve? A lot of Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span Obama Voters seemed surprised at how much lower their paychecks were this week. How surprising is it that workers making $30k will take a bigger hit on their pay than those earning $500K under new fiscal deal?
  • image022WALL STREET WEAK: Whistleblower Business Editor Merrill Forbes doesn’t know if Investors can see past the Fiscal Cliff or not, but the stock market seemed to like it this week. S&P closed at best level since December 2007.
  • LAYOFFS LOOMING: Now that the 2013 Obamacare layoffs and hiring freezes have officially begun, Obama Labor Secretary Hilda Solis said, “millions of jobs were saved” by extending unemployment benefits, because in Obama’s Fairyland, “Paying People Not to Work Equals Jobs.”
  • OBAMANOMICS: Youth Unemployment Hits 11.5%, 22.1% For Young Blacks.
  • THUGS ‘R US: Obama Labor Secretary Hilda Solis said, “millions of jobs were saved” by extending unemployment benefits, because in Obama’s Fairyland, “Paying People Not to Work Equals Jobs.”
  • MESSAGE FOR JOHN BOEHNER: Our Anderson Tea Party Patriots said it best: “As long as Speaker John Boehner and Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell are the face of the Republican Party and are running the Republican show on Capitol Hill, the Republican brand is dead.” [READ MORE HERE]
  • image023MEDIA MENDACITY: Disgraced Former VP Al Gore (and his business partners, who include former storefront lawyer king Joel Hyatt) sold the unwatched Current TV network to Qatar government-owned Al Jazeera. The new name? Al Gorezerra.
  • G-UNCONTROL UPDATE: Obama plans to ally himself with big business once again by using crony capitalist tactics to pass gun control just as he used them to pass Obamacare.
  • RACIAL HEALING UPDATE: Illinois DemocRAT Congress-Clown Danny Davis says Obama should unilaterally raise the Debt Ceiling like Lincoln freed the slaves, since everybody knows the Debt Ceiling is racist.
  • HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says on this date in 2001, Congress certified George W. Bush winner of 2000 elections and Defeated DemocRATS and their willing allies in the Liberal News Media haven’t stopped whining ever since.
  • VOTER FRAUD UPDATE: According to Plunderbund, Ohio Secretary of State Jon Husted admitted Voter Fraud in the Buckeye State is “Very Rare.” But how can this be? Nearly half of Republican voters believe voter fraud by now-defunct ACORN stole the election for Obama.
  • SPEAKING OF FRAUDS: According to a Hamilton County lawsuit, Republican State Rep-tile Peter Beck from McMason (representing Ohio’s 54th House District) has been accused of participating in a fraud that cheated investors out of more than $1.2 million. Fishwrapper Perry KimBall says Beck didn’t return calls on Friday. [READ MORE HERE]
  • FECKLESS FISHWRAPPERS: That Cabal of NoKY Attorneys Still Out to Destroy Eric “Call Me Crazy” Deters (including the Lisa Wells WLW Fan Club) is still wondering if Perry KimBall’s story about Geoffrey Damon, that attorney accused of stealing $61,554 from his former law firm (Butkovich & Crosthwaite) purposely omitted the name of another one of Damon’s employers, just because that employer may have filed another frivolous SLAPP lawsuit against Skaggie Maggie, Wedgie Washburn, Jim Hannah, and Terry DeMio at The Fishwrap?
  • image024OUR LATE NIGHT JOKEWATCHER liked Jay Leno’s “John Boehner was re-elected speaker of the house, which is pretty amazing — a Republican winning anything these days.”
  • FIRST AMENDMENT UPDATE: If Whistleblower Dream Team Chairman Scott Greenwood used his landmark Deters v The Blower Defense settling that Steubenville SLAPP suit, why aren’t our Forgetful Fishwrappers using the same strategy against “Crazy Eric” in his suit against him?
  • REPUBLICANS FOR HIGHER TAXES honored “Mean Jean” Schmidt on her final day in office with special tribute.They invited everyone to share their favorite “Mean Jean” memory.
  • WHISTLEBLOWER FOCUS GROUP: analyzing what went wrong with the Republican message in 2012, maybe we should take a look at something that went right, when a dozen of Boehner’s colleagues very publicly either voted for someone else for Speaker or chose not to vote. If only a few other conservatives had done the same, voting for Speaker would have moved to a second ballot. The dozen lawmakers may not have prevented Boehner’s reelection, but they did succeed in sending the Speaker a powerful message. At least Goof Doofus’ replacement, Tea Party guy Thomas Massie was one of the defecting dozen.
  • HAMILTON COUNTY RINO PARTY: While Alex T. Mall Cop GOP e-mailed a gushy tribute about Hamilton County Sheriff Si Leis, who’s retiring after nearly five decades of service to Hamilton County, did old “Blue Face” forget the top two headlines in Edition #1 of the Whistleblower on May 29, 1990 that said “SHERIFF LEIS HIRES HIS DAUGHTER VIOLATING STATE ETHICS LAWS” and “PROSECUTOR NEY REFUSES TO PROSECUTE LEIS.”
  • image025OHIO’S HEARTACHE OF IT ALL: In Columbus, Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders says Ohio RINO Party Boss Boob Bennett praised John Boehner’s re-election as Speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives, calling it “Another big step for Ohioans.” No kidding.
  • ROMNEY SUPPORTERS ANONYMOUS were really depressed this week when they heard the 2012 Republican presidential candidate will officially wind up with 47% of the vote, the exact percentage he claimed would never vote for him because they want a government handout. Turns out that predictions should’ve been 53%.
  • CLOWNS IN CONGRESS: On Friday, our Greater Cincinnati and Northern Kentucky’s House delegation (Chabot, Massie, and Wenstrup) voted against a bloated aid package for victims of Superstorm Sandy because there were no spending cuts to offset the additional spending. Each of the “no” votes was cast by a Republican when the bill passed 354-67. However, in the Senate when the measure passed by “unanimous consent,” that means Terrace Park Republican Rob “Fighting for Feel Good Legislation” Portman did not vote for such fiscal restraint.
  • GOING GALT: The phrase “Going Galt” doesn’t simply mean getting angry. “Going Galt” means recognizing that you’re being punished not for your vices but for your virtues.
  • image027THE CINCINNATI MESS (You’ll only read about in The Blower): Cincinnati Girly Mayor Marl Malory’s Trolley Folly will not be ready for riders until at least the spring of 2016. What a colossal waste of over-taxed payers’ money this boondoggle has been.
  • SENIOR SPOILED SPORTS EDITOR ANDY FURBALL says last year the Bungals lost their playoff game to the Texans 31-10. This year on Wild Card Saturday, with all that hype, they only lost 19-13. Will Marvin Lewis ever win a playoff game? It’s only been 22 years.
  • CH SNITCH AT 1000 MAIN STREET: Courthouse Hacks were all highly amused when they read Commissioner Me, Greg Hartmann’s year-in-review newsletter, celebrating his many successes in 2012. Curiously, that list did not include how the Gregster and his GOP accomplice Monzel raised your taxes to give more of your money to “Millionaire Mike” Brown.
  • REAL GOSSIP BY LINDA LIBEL: Everybody in Anderson (with the exception of Disgraced Anderson Township Trustee Kevin O’Brien’s protectors at the Forest Hills Urinal) is waiting to hear what happens when Whacky Jackie O’Brien’s Illegitimate Son Kevin’s latest spurious Motion to Dismiss those charges in his Public Masturbation Trial on Tuesday at 9 AM.
  • image030INVESTIGATIVE JOURNALIST FEARLESS FERRETT is already checking out that story (discovered by a private investigator) involving the criminal record of a woman who’s been active in Hamilton County RINO Party politics for several years. That report says she’s had six felonies in Ohio.
  • LOONY LIBERTARIANS: Cincinnati Mayoral Candidate Jim Berns he won’t come in last in this year’s primary election, so long as Sandra Queen Noble is in the race.
  • image031NOW HERE’S THE LATEST FROM BUNKY TADWELL, found in “Erotic Birthday Geetings,” available at better sticky pages bookstores everywhere.

Birthday Greetings From a Grouch
I hear you’re having a birthday,
But I know not which one.
I do know that, however,
You’re too old to have any fun.

Tho once your hopes were high,
You’re now forced to aim them lower.
All you can do is sit on your ass,
And write that damned Whistleblower.

  • LIBERAL LUNACY: In Human Events’ “365 Ways to Drive a Liberal Crazy,” # 360 is to ask a Liberal what’s the difference between DemocRATS in Congress and a group of drunken sailors. Answer: About a trillion dollars.
  • image033IN CLERMONT COUNTY: If Union Township Board of Trustees can dedicate Election Day to honor “Mean Jean” Schmidt and declare New Year’s Eve to as a tribute “Don White Day” in Union Township, Our Good Friend Archie Wilson (SHOWN WITH A PICTURE OF JESUS LOOKING OVER HIS SHOULDER) wonders when his day is.
  • IN ANDERSON: The Chamber of Commerce is wondering how many political job seekers will be waiting when the new Ohio Second District Congressional Office finally opens its doors at 7954 Beechmont in Anderson Township, across the street from the Anderson Tea Party Headquarters.
  • IN NORTHERN KENTUCKY: Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo Goof Doofus’ replacement in Congress Thomas Massie called Boehner’s failed Plan B a “Turd Sandwich” during a radio interview on the Mandy McConnell Show. Tea Party guy Thomas Massie was one of the nine defectors who didn’t vote for John Boehner’s re-election as Speaker of the House (unlike Chabot and Wenstrup). Massie also voted against that bloated aid package for victims of Superstorm Sandy because there were no spending cuts to offset the additional spending. Mirror, mirror on the wall, who’s the most Conservative of all?
  • AT THIS WEEK’S MEETING OF THE CONSERVATIVE AGENDA: Political Insiders were asking Charles Foster Kane if The Blower would be taking it easy on “Mean Jean,” now that she was out of office. “Define ‘Easy,’” Kane replied.
  • image034AND COMING UP IN “THE WEEK THAT WILL BE”:

Monday will be our Annual Significant Birthdays E-dition, and we’ll be hob-knobbing with celebrities at our Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane’s Surprise Birthday Party.

Tuesday, we’ll all be waiting to see what happened at Disgraced Anderson Township Trustee Kevin O’Brien’s Public Masturbation Trial.

Wednesday, we’ll be checking to see if our Hamilton County Property Taxes have finally arrived.

Thursday, we’ll see if John Boehner has already broken his New Year’s Resolution not to cave in to Obama this year.

And the first line of Friday’s limerick is: “So what should Conservatives do now?”

WEEK IN REVIEW HOT LINE

e-mail your revolutionary recaps today

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Some political score-keeping items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally political score-keeping subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more.

Link of the Day

Fiscal Cliff 2013 explained: Obama, Republicans fiddle as economy burns

image039Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.

Current Whistleblower Policies and Disclaimers can be found here

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