Sunday, August 5, 2012
The Blower’s Week in Review
OUR NUMBER ONE STORY THIS WEEK was Wednesday’s unbelievably successful “Chick-Fil-A- Appreciation Day,” when more than 700,000 potential Romney supporters flocked to their nearest Chick-Fil-A restaurants and celebrate Free Speech.- OUR NUMBER TWO STORY THIS WEEK was Friday’s unbelievably unsuccessful “National Same-Sex Spit-Swapping Day Protest,” sponsored by Sodomy Rites Activists and Obama Supporters in the Press to deflect attention from Obama’s Failed Economy one more time. Somewhere on the internet we read “Chicken lips are scarce as the Great Gay Kiss-Off lays a giant egg.”
- AND OUR NUMBER THREE STORY THIS WEEK was the deafening silence you heard on Saturday when TV viewers saw more pictures of that vandalism to a Chick-Fil-A building in California than photos of the few Gays, Lesbians, Bisexuals, and Transgenders who showed up to gross out ordinary Americas just trying to enjoy their chicken sandwiches and waffle fries.
MONDAY in our Special “Agony of O-lympic Defeat” E-dition, The Blower said even Obama’s Ego-Mania has its limits as we recalled Obama’s Failure of Olympic Proportions.
On October 5, 2009 in our Special “Agony of O-lympic Defeat” E-dition, The Blower described Obama’s “Failure of Olympic Proportions,” as ABC’s Charlie Gibson went to Chicago for Obama’s “Crushing’” Olympic Defeat, and the Obama Suck-up called it a real “Kick in the Pants” for Obama.
What a bummer that was for Obama. Those of us following Obama’s Permanent Campaign at Over-Taxed Payers’ Expense Every Day Since His Inauguration recognized the 2016 O-lympics in Chicago as a great kickoff for his “Historic Third Term.” Do you think Obama’s “Special Olympics Joke” on Jay Leno helped America’s cause?
According to Fox News, Obama’s failure to grab the gold in his personal quest to send the 2016 Olympics to Chicago was a stunning setback for a president who had until then enjoyed a pop star reception abroad.
But Obama’s stumble cost him more than the $1.2 million of over-taxed payer’s money to make the overnight dash from Washington to Copenhagen. Obama and first lady Michelle Obama risked their political capital and the prestige of the presidency on an enormous Olympic campaign that resulted in an early exit for Chicago and the top prize going to Rio de Janeiro.
The Danish News said, “Obama’s Arrogance Turned Off IOC.” No wonder when Karl Rove was asked to comment on Obama’s Olympic Failure, Dubya’s former Chief of Staff said, “Obama got what he deserved,” even as Liberals blamed George W. Bush.
Obama’s statement after losing the 2016 Olympics was a real load of crap.
[READ MORE HERE]
TUESDAY in our Special “More Politics As Usual” E-dition, The Blower said most people just want it to be over and our “Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers” included:
How’s this for campaign strategy: The White House just told us to call Romney a “Wimp.” —Newsweak Magazine
Even as the U.S. National Debt approached $16 Trillion, House Republicans have no plans to move forward this week on a catch-all spending bill to avert the government shutdown. Congress will instead leave town for a five-week recess without voting on a continuing resolution or even introducing it. —GOP House Speaker John Boehner
On this date in 1975, Teamsters Union Goon Jimmy Hoffa went missing, but he’s still registered as a DemocRAT. — Hurley the Historian
That’s why we chose Dave Barry’s “Florida’s number three industry, behind tourism and skin cancer, is voter fraud.” —Your Quote for Today Committee
Just like everywhere else in the country, Disgruntled DemocRATS are less enthusiastic about voting this year. —Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders
[READ MORE HERE]
WEDNESDAY in our Special “Political Poultry” E-dition, The Blower wished everybody a “Happy Chick-Fil-A Appreciation Day.”
Now that Obama has devolved down to pander to homosexual donors on the issue of same-sex marriage, and Disingenuous DemocRATS will be giving same-sex marriage their stamp of approval at the DNC’s Convention in Charlotte, Gay-Loving Liberal Big City Mayors seeking publicity on the 24-hour news channels like Chicago’s Rahm Emanuel, Boston’s Tom Menino, and San Francisco’s Mayor Edwin Lee said Chick fil A restaurants will not be welcome in their cities, just because Chick-Fil-A president Dan Cathy stated his support for “traditional marriage.”
And today in Cincinnati, everybody’s wondering why The Fishwrap isn’t demanding Dainty DemocRAT Mayor Mark Mallory call his Extreme Liberal Clown-cil back into session to throw a hissy fit and pass a resolution banning Chick-Fil-A from hiring unemployed people to work at their restaurants within the city limits, like Chick-Fil-A locations in Anderson, Eastgate, Florence, Kenwood Town Centre, Springdale, Tri-County, Deerfield Crossing, and West Chester, along with locations in Florence and the Airport in Northern Kentucky. The only Chick-Fil-A restaurants that actually appear to be within Cincinnati’s city limits appear to be the ones at UC and Western Hills.
[READ MORE HERE]
THURSDAY, in our Special “Obama in Ohio” E-dition, The Blower said it was just another Over-Taxed Payers’ Funded Campaign Speech:
Wednesday, Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders said Ohio lawmakers were outraged about Obama’s landing at Mansfield Lahm Airport, because it’s the same airport for that Air National Guard Unit the Obama Administration has proposed eliminating. Word is the 800 Guardsmen at the base who’ll be losing their jobs were not all that pleased either.
Romney VP Wannabe Rob “Fighting for FUBARs” Portman said, “Time and again, these Ohioans have answered the call to serve. They must be pretty frustrated to see the president drop into town, ignore their award-winning work, and fail to give them a straight answer about his plans to end their important mission.”
Ohio Republican Party Chairman Robert Bennett said, “Punching someone in the stomach and then asking them for their lunch money probably won’t go over well with people in Mansfield.”
Meanwhile, if there were any War Hero Congressional Candidates hereabouts, Obama’s plans to cut the Defense Budget in Ohio might be a timely opportunity to wake up and make some sort of statement.
Not to worry: In Washington, Obama’s $172,000-per-year Press Dweeb Jay Cardboard claimed he was unaware about the defense cuts that would close that Air Force Base in Ohio, wherever the hell that was.
[READ MORE HERE]
FRIDAY in our Special “Chick-Fil-A Analysis” E-dition, The Blower asked if Wednesday was just a preview of November:
Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus says Obama Supporters in the Press couldn’t say enough about audience reaction to Obama’s Class Warfare Speeches in Ohio. It must’ve been a whole lot more newsworthy than those few Romney supporters who stood in line throughout the day to buy chicken sandwiches and waffle fries at 1,600 Chick Fil A restaurants across the country to celebrate “Chick-Fil-A Appreciation Day.” Now if only all those people remember to put a Romney for President sign in their front yards and show up at the polls in “94” more days.
Wednesday seemed like the 2012 mid-term elections all over again. Do you think the majority of Americans are just sick of having the radical gay agenda rubbed in their faces? Maybe they’re just tired of being flogged as “extremists,” “homophobes,” “haters,” and “bigots” for simply affirming traditional marriage. Eating at Chick-Fil-A may have been a good way to stick it in the eye of the left-wingers who won’t accept that the rest of us simply don’t agree with them on cultural issues. It’s something new— it’s called Freedom of Speech.
Maybe that’s why our Quote for Today Committee chose Ronald Reagan’s “Sometimes I can’t help but feel the First Amendment is being turned on its head.”
[READ MORE HERE]
SATURDAY in our Special Obama’s “51st Birthday” E-dition, The Blower predicted, “He plans to make it a National Holiday during his second term.”
The July Jobs Report wasn’t exactly a great birthday present for Barack. The Bogus Jobless Rate has only been about 8% for 42 straight months. The Real Unemployment Rate is even worse. Obama’s Dissociated Press says more job creation would help Obama’s re-election hope. And you thought they weren’t paying attention.
In Columbus, Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders reports Ohio RINO Party Chairman Boob Bennett says “Forty-two straight months of bad unemployment numbers underscores that the private sector is not doing fine. Now is the time for Obama to stop strong-arming Congress into raising taxes on small businesses, which Ernst & Young says threatens to destroy more than 700,000 jobs.
Now is also the time to ask why the Obama for America Campaign, the DemocRAT National Committee, and the Ohio DemocRAT Party filed suit in Ohio to strike down part of that state’s law governing voting by members of the military.
Meanwhile, Obama’s $172,000-per-year Press Dweeb Jay Cardboard says the unemployment rate rising to 8.3% and 195,000 fewer Americans with jobs is “Evidence” of Obama’s Recovery. No kidding.
[READ MORE HERE]
THE SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL
Although our campaign is not associated with the Failed United Way, your liberal guilt giving throughout the year still makes it all possible.
SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL HOT LINE
e-mail your stories about worthy waifs today.
- OBAMA 2012 CAMPAIGN: After that disastrous July Jobs report was released on Friday, Obama Supporters couldn’t stop whining that everybody was saying the so-called unemployment rate (which has been above 8% for the past 42 months) had increased from 8.2% to 8.3%.
It’s really only 8.254%,” they insisted.
ROMNEY 2012 CAMPAIGN: Mitt Romney told Harry Reid to “put up or shut up” about all those false accusations Obama’s Disingenuous DemocRAT Senate Leader was making on the floor of the Senate at the same time Clint “Dirty Harry” Eastwood was making Mitt’s day with his endorsement.- OHIO RINO PARTY: In Columbus, Buckeye Bureau Chef Gerry Manders reported Ohio Republican Party Chairman Boob Bennett got a couple of good slams in on Obama this week. First was when Obama landed at Mansfield Lahm Airport (the same airport for that Air National Guard Unit the Obama Administration has proposed eliminating), Bennett said “Punching someone in the stomach and then asking them for their lunch money probably won’t go over well with people in Mansfield.” Second was after that disastrous July Jobs report was released on Friday, and Bennett said “Forty-two straight months of bad unemployment numbers underscores that the private sector is not doing fine. Now is the time for Obama to stop strong-arming Congress into raising taxes on small businesses, which Ernst & Young says threatens to destroy more than 700,000 jobs.”
THE LATEST POLLS: Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says frustration in America these days runs deep. Just 14% think today’s children will be better off than their parents.- OUR LATE NIGHT JOKEWATCHER liked Conan O’Brien’s “The U.S. team has swept all the medals in the skeet shooting event. So despite our bad economy, it’s nice to know our country has never been safer from an attack of skeets.”
- HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says on this date in 1861, President Lincoln imposed the first federal income tax by signing the Revenue Act. Strapped for cash to pay for the Civil War, Lincoln and Congress agreed to impose a three percent tax on annual incomes over $800. Those were the good old days.
- OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE: chose Dr. Laurence J. Peter’s “America is a land of taxation that was founded to avoid taxation.”
- VOTER FRAUD UPDATE: In Columbus, Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders says Voters First, the group that turned in all those bogus signatures, receives most of its funding from unions and union-backed groups.
- THUGS ‘R US: Ohio Union Bosses say, “Is that a coincidence or what?”
HAMILTON COUNTY DEMOCRATS: Did Demo-Labor Party Boss Tim Burka really say his party has no viable candidates to run for Congress in Ohio’s First and Second Congressional Districts?- MEDIA MENDACITY: This week Obama Supporters in the Press skipped the First Amendment angle of the Chick-Fil-A story, but went way out of their way to highlight the Same Sex Activists’ hissy fits.
- LIBERAL LUNACY: In Human Events’ “365 Ways to Drive a Liberal Crazy,” #223 says if the Obama administration isn’t socialist, how come Americans had to pay more to the government in taxes in 2011 than they spent on food, clothing, and shelter combined?
- DELUSIONAL DEMOCRATS: House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi maintained Thursday that her “loyalty lies” with KFC when asked about the ongoing controversy over the owner of Chick-fil-A’s stance on marriage equality.
- REPUBLICANS FOR HIGHER TAXES: While celebrating its Fifth Anniversary, Republicans for Higher Taxes broke a MAJOR story about The Cincinnati Streetcar. The City of Blue Ash is going to help Cincinnati fund the streetcar! On July 30, Blue Ash Clowncil met in secret and agreed behind closed doors to help Cincinnati with its streetcar. They will officially pass this plan at their August 9 Council meeting.
- MORE FECKLESS FISHWRAPPERY: Metro Mole says after The Fishwrap downplayed and delayed reporting hundreds of thousands of people celebrating family values at “Chick-Fil-A Appreciation Day” on Wednesday, they blatantly promoted attendance for these tasteful National Same Sex Spit Swapping Day Protesters on Friday:
“If you’re going to any local Chick-fil-A’s as part of National Same-Sex Kiss Day, let us know by posting below. If you can, please tell us when and where you’ll be. You can also email me at cweiser@enquirer.com and let me know.”
- RACIAL HEALING UPDATE: Diversity Devotee Tino Delgato wonders if Mahogany’s be open in time for the 2013 Macy’s Jazz Festival and before the Freedom Museum’s displays are moved to the Museum Center on Ezzard Charles? Go Figure!!!
- LEGAL BRIEFS: members of that Cabal of Attorneys Still Out to Destroy “Crazy Eric” Deters were highly amused when prosecutors asked for a gag order aimed primarily at “Crazy Eric,” because of too much pre-trial publicity about the case involving the Sarah Jones Sex Scandal. “Crazy Eric,” of course, wants the entire case thrown out of court, and to prove it he says, “My client Sarah Jones is not a sex fiend.”
HOW ABOUT DEM REDS: Tragedy occurred Friday night at Great American Ball Park during the rehearsal for Marty Brennaman’s head shaving event, when somebody confused The Blower’s Faux Facebook “Friend” / WCPO Sports Guy Dennis Janson’s poufy hair for Marty’s.- THE CINCINNATI MESS (You’ll only read about in The Blower): What’s this about Cincinnati’s Clown-cil Gay Chris Squeal-Back’s hobby of grabbing guys’ asses and making lewd comments in restaurants, according to police reports?
- CH SNITCH AT 1000 MAIN STREET: wonders when David A. Pepper showed up at this week’s Commissioners Meeting to lobby for more money for the county’s mental health Levy, why didn’t anybody ask the Disgraced Former Hamilton County Commissioner who was paying him to be there?
- IN ANDERSON: nobody was really surprised when Disgraced Dis-Trustee Kevin “Spanky” O’Brien failed to show up on Wednesday at his trial for masturbating in a woman’s car. Did his attorney really say more time was needed to look for evidence?
- OHIO’S SECOND CONGRESSIONAL DISTRICT: Everybody’s now trying to figure out who’s really behind that vile-and-disgusting YouTube Video asking if Brad Wenstrup has a secret. Persons of Consequence first learned about it in Friday’s e-dition when The Blower labeled it “a dirty, nasty, underhanded, totally substantiated smear job, right out of the Larry Flynt Playbook.”
Some people were EVEN waiting to see if the reason “Bronze Star Brad” wasn’t seen at the Chick-Fil-A protest with Lovely Lori Viars in Warren County on Wednesday was because he planned to show up at the Friday protest instead.
- CLERMONT CRONIES: Party Boss Tim Rudd “The Dudd” wants to know if anybody from “Mean Jean” Schmidt’s office was responsible for that Wenstrup video. “I’m sorry to say the people working for me aren’t that smart,” Her Meanness admitted, “Or how would I have ever lost to that guy?”
THIS WEEK IN NORTHERN KENTUCKY: Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says after Goof Doofus announced he was resigning from Congress immediately this week, there was some confusion about whether DemocRAT Governor Steve Be-Sheared could appoint a replacement for The Goofster, or would he have to call a special election. The answer to that conundrum was answered by ACLU Mouthpiece and Chairman of The Blower’s Legal Dream Team Scott Greenwood. Under ACLU v. Taft (remember that disgrace of a governor?), the governor can’t simply name a replacement, and has no discretion whether to call an election. It’s mandatory.- READING THE TEA LEAVES: The Tea Party had a big victory this week when Ted Cruz won the GOP U.S. Senate Primary in Texas, but curiously, the Anderson Tea Party was not claiming total responsibility for the win.
NOW HERE’S THE LATEST FROM BUNKY TADWELL, THE BARD OF CLEVES: Summer is still sweltering and we have another timely poem from Bunky Tadwell, the Bard of Cleves.
Summer Seatings
The days in summer linger long
The nights are made for love.
And things will go just fine
With her perched up above.
THIS WEEK AT A MEETING OF THE CONSERVATIVE AGENDA: Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane if our Kneepad Liberals in the Press would be letting Sodomy Rites Activists have a do-over, in case they couldn’t get as many gays, lesbians, bi-sexuals, and transgenders to show up on Friday to equal the 700,000 Americans who stood in line Wednesday for Chick-Fil-A Appreciation Day.
“They really should,” Kane explained. “The reason they didn’t have many people show up for their protest was due to all that confusion about whom to kiss. Gay guys were supposed to kiss other gay guys and Lesbians were supposed to kiss other Lesbians, but Bisexuals and Transgenders. weren’t so sure.”
AND COMING UP IN “THE WEEK THAT WILL BE”: The Blower’s Campaign Countdowns to will continue. Speaking of which, the 2012 Elections are only “92” days away.
Monday our gay coverage will continue with our salute to the Enola Gay.
Tuesday is “National Lighthouse Day” and we’re pretty sure there won’t be too many celebrations around here.
Wednesday is “Sneak Some Zucchini onto Your Neighbor’s Porch Day” so you’ll want to get your Kevin O’Brien jokes in for that,
Thursday is “Book Lovers Day,” and Rick “The BatBoy” Robinson says he’ll be glad to come to your house and sign one.
The first line of next Friday’s limerick is: “Who’ll Be Mitt Romney’s Vice Presidential Selection” and we’ll see how much dirt you can dig up on Rob “Fighting for Fund-raisers” Portman for that.
And Saturday we’ll certainly be celebrating “Presidential Joke Day,” and we bet you already know which president we’ll be joking about.
WEEK IN REVIEW HOT LINE
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Some political scorekeeping items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally political scorekeeping subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more.
Link of the Day
Reagan Warned Us About Obama
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