TODAY IS
FRIDAY, MAY 06, 2021
TRUMP’S FOUR-HUNDRED-AND-SEVENTY-FIRST DAY OUT-OF-OFFICE
AND WHICH GOP POLITICIANS WILL ATTEND TRUMP’S $75K DERBY PARTY?
Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers
Eleven days from now, the big day will finally arrive, and the National Spotlight will be on Kentucky to see the results of the Bluegrass Primary Elections. —Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus
That day’s turnout in Kentucky might not match The Blower’s single-digit prediction, but it probably won’t be the lowest turnout in Kentucky’s history, either. —Chief Election Michael G. Adams
Just remember what Jesse “The Body” Ventura always said: “If you don’t vote, you’ll be leaving the decision to someone even dumber than you are.” —Your Quote for Today Committee
People must’ve forgotten what Jesse “The Body” Ventura always said: “If you don’t vote, you’ll be leaving the decision to someone even dumber than you are.” —Your Quote for Today Committee
For weeks, everybody had been wondering if history would once again repeat itself, like when TEA Party Candidate Rand Paul sent the establishment’s Trey Grayson back to Harvard in shame from his ass-kicking in that U.S. Senate Race GOP Primary. —Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo
Watching the Bluegrass Primary results in 2010 was the worst night of my life. —Trey Grayson
At least The Blower didn’t ask which Disingenuous D-RAT Senatorial Candidate I would’ve preferred to face. . —Rand Paul
Did Rand Paul ever support me for Senate Minority Leader? —Bitch McConnell
The historic 2016 Bluegrass D-RAT Presidential Primary was too close to call, especially since there weren’t any recent polls showing a clear favorite —Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen
Does anybody remember how long it’s been since I did my crazy election picks in The Blower? —Nathan “Cornbread” Smith
Does a photo op with the UK Wildcats count as campaigning in Kentucky? —Bluegrass Politicians
Why are there so many unsolved murders in Kentucky? Because there are no dental records and everyone has the same DNA. —Your Late Night TV Jokewatcher
What if we said “No Republican has ever won the White House without first winning Kentucky?” —Former Fishwrapper Howard Wilkinson, who has never been heard from again at WNKU-FM in Northern Kentucky
And we were really doing our best to keep all that “Little Money” out of politics. —Super PACs
Remember what we always say: “A vote for the lesser of two evils is still a vote for evil. — Loony Libertarians
About this time in 1999, Disgraced Former DemocRAT President Bill Clinton apologized to the Chinese for bombing their embassy in Belgrade, Yugoslavia. In 2016, Rambo-bama didn’t have time to apologize— he just kept on droning, and our Glory Hound in the White House would be spiking the football every chance he got for the next 247 days of Obama’s Second Term, unless the First Black President in History should’ve been impeached. —Hurley the Historian
Does anybody remember when I couldn’t do any better job managing Campbell County Sheriff Jeff Kidwell’s re-election campaign, than I did trying to help my protégé Rick “The Batboy” Robinson when he ran against Gex “Rhymes With Sex” Williams in the 1998 GOP Congressional Primary. —“BeanBall Jim” Bunning
Where can we go to “unregister” so we stop getting all those Robocalls? —Registered Republicans
We were waiting to see how many of those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters Who Put The Positively Worst President in History In The White House—Twice, and Failed Trying To Give Obama a Third Term By Voting For Hillary, and get all of their “fake news” from our Biden Supporters in the Press, like the ones at The Fishwrap and on Channel 5, 9, 12, 19, and Spectrum , called us to ask about our irrelevant idiotorial endorsements to take to the polls today. —Feckless Fishwrappers
Even if there were only one or two races to vote on? —Dumbed-Down Fishwrap Subscribers
After that night, we knew we would probably never get our names in The Blower again. —Will T. Scott and Geoff Young
The problem with last year’s primary was that there were not enough negative attack ads. —Greedy TV Ad Salesmen
I bet you Blower Bashers were sorry you didn’t have me to kick around anymore since I haven’t run for re-election after 2014. —Scarry Garry Edmonson
Covering the news in Kentucky is a big problem because it’s like a whole different state. —TV 19’s Trish the Dish
When did they change Kentucky’s State Motto to “Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names?” —TV5’s Sheree Paolello
Remember: We never print all the bad stuff we know and certain people ought to be damn glad we don’t, especially Ex-Governor Steven L. Beshear, whose name was still on the state sign above.
— Whistleblower Official Weekly Disclaimer —
Sometimes The Blower makes fun of so-called Voting Rights Activists to show that “whining about Early Voting and Voter Fraud” is not acceptable in our society. This should be clear to anybody who isn’t a Disingenuous D-RAT.
BLUEGRASS PRIMARY HOTLINE
e-mail your voter fraud sightings today.
Some Bluegrass bashing items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally Bluegrass Bashing subscribers.
WHISTLEBLOWER CLASSIC BLUEGRASS VIDEO
Note: We guarantee iPhone subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.