TODAY IS
FRIDAY, JULY 19, 2024
TRUMP’S TWELVE-HUNDRED AND SEVENTY-SIXTH DAY OUT-OF-OFFICE
AND OHIO D-RAT FIRST DISTRICT CONGRESSMAN BOY TOY SAYS DISGRACED RESIDENT JOKE BIDEN SHOULD STILL NOT DROP OUT

Houston, We Really Have a Problem!

This week, everybody who remembers the safe return of the Apollo 11 Spacecraft 50 years ago on July 20, e-mailed an entry to the Whistleblower Limerick Contest.

The winner is a boyhood Neil Armstrong’s next-door neighbor, Mr. Gorsky, whom the first moonwalker recalled during his historic lunar landing.

Mr. Gorsky wins an official photograph of Obama from his photo-op with Apollo 11 astronauts Neil Armstrong, Michael Collins, and Edwin “Buzz” Aldrin in the Oval Office on July 20, 2009 to commemorate their historic landing; a White House Video of Disgraced Ex-President Obama’s speech where he claimed to be in Hawaii during the moonwalk when his own biography says he was really living in Indonesia at the time, and an official White House clarification concerning Obama’s account of being in Hawaii during the event.

Not since Bill Clinton got caught lying about watching black churches being torched in Arkansas when none ever caught on fire has a presidential memory been discredited so quickly. No wonder our Quote for the Day Committee chose Abraham Lincoln’s: “No man has a good enough memory to be a successful liar.”

Mr. Gorsky’s winning entry is:

Back when America put a man on the moon
The national debt had yet to balloon.
“Made in the USA” was still a good motto
And we weren’t called “arrogant” by some a-hole mulatto.
Apollo 11 was the sweetest patriotic tune.

And from the Anderson Laureate, who wonders why they don’t give out Pulitzer Prizes for Limericks:

Back when Americans put a man on the moon,
Apollo 11 was the spacemen’s cocoon.
Just about eight years sooner
Before the expedition lunar
A Hawaiian and Kenyan spawned a buffoon.

Now Here’s Perturbed in Park Hill’s 16/14 Sonnet                                                                                                                             

Back when America put a man on the moon,

Elvis was still making legions of females swoon.

 

Stonewall riots set the stage for LGBS;

Where militant “pride” leads is anybody’s guess.

 

The Jets beat the Colts in Superbowl Three,

“Broadway Joe” Namath became MVP.

 

Tricky Dick was sworn in as 37th Prez,

And the Earth was without Ocasio-Cortez

.

The Beatles played their last gig on the roof,

After which they remained mostly aloof.

 

But one lady beat Neil Armstrong to La Luna:

That was Alice Kramden, of lowly fortuna.

 

Ralphie boy sent her to the moon every week

As those re-runs hit an un-paralleled streak.

 

We still laugh at his “Har-har-hardee-har-har”:

The Honeymooners: a simpler life’s memoir.

FINALLY, AN UPDATE ON PERTURB’S SONNET
Back when America put a man on the moon
The Jets beat the Colts and made the AFL swoon.
Soyuz 4 and 5 made a docking maneuver,
While the secret gay life of J. Edna Hoover
Was still only whispered in the halls of power,
While he looked for more pretty boys to deflower.
Yassir Arafat took over the PLO,
Installed there, no doubt, by wads of globalist dough.
Lennon and Yoko had their first bed-in for peace,
But their Beatlemania was about to cease.
Sirhan Sirhan was convicted for RFK:
Another hit job covered up by the Beltway.
James Earl Ray pled guilty for shooting MLK,
Speaking of coverups, there’s even more foul play.
Charles de Gaulle resigned as the President of France,
Forcing him to try on a brand-new pair of pants.
The Cuyahoga caught fire in Cleveland, O:
A certain luster on that city did bestow.
1969 was a memorable year,
But the Big Red Machine was about to appear

The first line of next week’s limerick is:
“Here’s who to thank when you succeed”

HISTORIC HEADLINES HOT LINE
e-mail your revisionist rhetoric today.

Some lunar landing items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally out of this world subscribers, but we could always use more.

Whistleblower Video of the Day

Neil Armstrong’s One Small Step

First steps on the moon by Neil Armstrong while he says his now immortal words.”On small step for man, One giant leap for man-kind.”

   Note: We guarantee iPhone subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.

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