TUESDAY, MAY 22, 2018

Still More Gas Pains
Yesterday in our “Up Your Octane E-dition, The Blower remembered when gas stations were the ones getting robbed, with GasBuggy.com reporting gas gouging in Bevis (wherever the hell that is) at $2.99-a-gallon, while the continuing rise of gasoline prices is affecting people’s travel plans, with many saying they are putting off by the idea of taking a road trip this summer as the national average moves closer to the $3 per gallon mark.

The Blower remembers when Tri-state TV Newsreaders could hardly contain themselves when gasoline prices spiked up to nearly $3-per-gallon, and we assumed it was only the oil companies trying to get ahead of that summer driving surge.

The Blower remembers before the 2012 Election when Donald Trump (as a private citizen) tweeted “Gas prices are at crazy levels—fire Obama!” We’ll be surprised the Destroy Trump Media doesn’t start The Trumpster any day now.

And The Blower also remembers back in 2007 when we said: Not to worry in Congress, Disingenuous DemocRATS Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid were already blaming President Bush and promising to pass a big windfall profits tax to punish the oil companies and all those people who paid all those record taxes last month. Even then The Blower was suggesting you include Stocktrades oil stocks in your portfolio. As our Conservative Curmudgeon Stu Mahlin Curmudgeon said: “You can’t ever go very far wrong investing in whatever Liberals hate.” Dems say there’s no need for a common sense energy policy for America or increased domestic production, not as long as we can still buy oil from the terrorists. Hurley the Historian says on this date in 1769 George Washington endorsed “non-importation.” Those Founding Fathers were really smart!

Over at the Morning Fishwrap, our Kneepad Liberals could always rerun that incriminating picture of that year’s 434th most influential Congresswoman standing next to that oh-so-economical Chevy Tahoe she bought right after she promised to find jobs for all those soon-to-be-fired workers at the Ford plant in Batavia. Of course, they’ll also forget to mention she voted for Boob Taft’s tax on gasoline.

Or, with then-only 15 more days till the GOP Gubernatorial Primary in Kentucky, they could’ve always shown Governor Ernest Flew to Paducah using a state plane to campaign all over the Bluegrass.

These days, local TV news crews will probably continue to interview guys at gas stations standing next to their SUVs (these American Dream machines are almost as economical to drive as an Abrams tank) wondering why prices are so high. Maybe if the TV stations would stop sending all their trucks to gas stations to interview all those dumbed-down drivers, we could conserve a little energy.

Sometimes on the internet you can find places that will tell you the price of gasoline at various stations around town like WCPO-TV and “Cincy gas prices.” Notice how the lowest prices are always so close to where you live.

To lower your fuel costs, our Quote for Today Committee suggests you follow George Carlin’s advice: “Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers.”

Maybe high gasoline prices should be a real campaign issue for our mid-term elections in only 167 more days.

GAS GUZZLERS HOT LINE
e-mail your peak prices today. Some vile-and-disgusting items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally vile-and-disgusting subscribers, like the above illustration of a real gas guzzler.

HERE’S HOW TO LOWER YOUR FUEL COSTS

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