SUNDAY, MARCH 25, 2018

This Sunday in America…at the Church of The Compassionate Conservative, Beloved Whistleblower Publisher, the Right-Wing Reverend Charles Foster Kane was asking his Political Parishioners to Pray for Pastimes, since Major League Baseball’s Opening Day on March 29 is the earliest in history. 

The early start is due to the most recent Collective Bargaining Agreement, which will create three to four additional off days for millionaire players throughout the season. 

As a result, every team will open on the same day for the first time since 1968.

MLB’s full slate of games begins on ESPN at 12:30 p.m., when the Miami Marlins have the honor of hosting the Chicago Cubs.

2018 local excitement will no doubt peak later at 4:10 p.m., when Homer Bailey, sporting his 6.39 ERA over the previous three seasons, is scheduled to be the Reds’ Opening Day pitcher after Lawrenceburg, Indiana native Nick Goepper, who won the silver medal in slopestyle (whatever the hell that is) at the recently completed Winter Olympics in Pyeongchang, South Korea) throws out the ceremonial first pitch.

So once again, Reds fans can forget Cincinnati’s long-discarded honor of always getting to host “Baseball’s Opening Game” every year, just because the first fully professional baseball team was the 1869 Cincinnati Red Stockings (ten men on salary for eight months from March 15 to November 15).

Whistleblower Senior Spoiled Sports Editor Andy FurBall says the Cincinnati Red Stockings won their first game on May 4, 1869 by a score of 45-9.  They then went on to go 57-1 (wins-tie), touring the U.S. playing teams from Boston to San Francisco, something that had not been done before.

FurBall predicts the 2018 Reds’ record probably won’t be nearly so good.

FurBall also says the next year, they won another 24 straight games before finally losing 8-7 in 11 innings against the Brooklyn Atlantics on June 14.  After their first loss, attendance declined substantially and they were disbanded the following year despite only losing six games all season. Reds Sportscaster Marty Brennaman remembers it well.

Other 2018 Opening Day Stories in The Blower
Saturday’s “Patronage County Today” E-dition (“Opening Day Jitters’)