The Whistleblower Newswire Is Your Official Publication of Record For The Conservative Agenda
THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 30, 2017
Tonight’s Top Conservative News Stories You Won’t See On The Front Page Of Tomorrow’s Fishwrap
(Or On Channels 5, 9, 12, And 19, Either)
— BREAKING NEWS —
Fishwrappers Will Be Staying Home For The Holidays
Cincinnati’s morning newspaper, dubbed “The Morning Fishwrap” by Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane, will be boycotting the Whistleblower-Newswire’s Annual Holiday Party for the Media, Feckless Fishwrappers confirmed on Thursday, citing Kane’s continuous attack on the News Rag for the past 27 years.
“We will not be attending this year’s Whistleblower-Newswire Holiday Party,” Metro Mole confided. “In light of Kane’s unrelenting attacks on the Radical Liberal Establishment Media for their Lies and Fake News, along with The Fishwrap by having continued to point out that Feckless Fishwrappers are “too lazy, too stupid, or too dishonest ever to report the Truth,” we do not feel it would be appropriate to celebrate with Kane and his other invited guests. We will send a Fishwrap reporting team to the event, and report on it if news warrants.”
— Today’s Top Trump Tweet Takedown—
— Tonight’s North Korea Update —
Texas Sanctuary City Crackdown Proved Correct – Kate’s Killer Walks From SF Sanctuary Court
Liberal Media is Crumbling! – Massive Layoffs!
Take a Knee… my Ass!!
— TONIGHT’S NEW BEN GARRISON MOMENT —
DRAIN THE DEEP STATE SWAMP
TO SEE MORE BEN GARRISON ILLUSTRATIONS, CLICK HERE
— TONIGHT’S PHOTO-SHOP EDITORIAL SPOOF ON CURRENT EVENTS FROM EDWARD CROPPER —
TO SEE MORE PHOTO SHOP EDITORIAL SPOOFS FROM EDWARD CROPPER, CLICK HERE
— Whistleblower NFL Boycott Countdown Continues —
NFL Owners Appear Poised To Pay Nearly $100 Million Bribe For Nothing
— TONIGHT’S REAL NEWS FROM SATIRICAL WEB SITES —
TO SEE MORE BIG HAIRY NEWS, CLICK HERE
DeWalt Unveils New Signature Kaepernick Kneepads
TO SEE MORE STORIES FROM THE PEOPLE’S CUBE, CLICK HERE
Man Coming Out Of Year-Long Coma Excited To Catch Up On Humanity’s Progress
TO HEAR MORE BUZZ FROM THE BABYLON BEE, CLICK HERE
Melania Trump Hangs Decayed Badger Carcass Over White House Mantel To Finish Off Traditional Slovenian Christmas Decor
WASHINGTON—Smiling as she found just the right spot for the decoration, Melania Trump hung a decayed badger carcass over the White House mantel Thursday in keeping with the traditions of Slovenian Christmas. “Ah, it finally feels like the holidays,” said the First Lady, adding that the animal’s… (MORE)
TO SEE MORE STORIES FROM THE ONION, CLICK HERE
— Tonight’s Top Three Whistleblower Political Posters —
— HERE’S HOW YOU CAN SUPPORT YOUR FAVORITE FAKE NEWS SITE —
The Whistleblower Newswire Is The Official Publication of Record For The Conservative Agenda
The Blower believes we’re living during the most important period in American History for our non-stop campaign against Political Correctness, the Devolution of American Culture, and the Liberal News Media. Congress and the Liberal Media Establishment will continue to lie and say really stupid things without a smidgen of journalistic integrity in their effort to advance the Liberal Agenda.
Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane Says The Conservative Agenda Is Now Completing Working On Donald Trump’s Third 100 Days To Make America Great Again. Today Is Day Number 316. There Are Now Only 1,068 More Days Until Trump’s Re-election Day on November 3, 2020.
