TUESDAY, JULY 12, 2016
Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers
If Disingenuous DemocRATS think the CNN All Stars had just another bad week leading up to the All Star Break, think how bad it’ll be during the next 1,210 Days remaining Until Trump’s Re-election Day on November 3, 2020. —Political Scorekeepers
This week in 1979, President Jimmy Carter addressed the nation on live TV to discuss the nation’s crisis in confidence and accompanying recession and 220,000 Americans who found jobs in June are glad Donald Trump is “Making America Great Again.” —Hurley the Historian
That’s why we chose Trump’s “I’ll be the greatest president for jobs that God ever created.” Your Quote For Today Committee
We still support Obama because he says he “tried real hard” to make things better. — Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters Who Put The Positively Worst President in History In The White House—Twice, and Failed Trying To Give Obama a Third Term By Voting For Hillary, and get all of their “fake news” from our Obama Supporters in the Press, like the ones at The Fishwrap and on Channel 5, 9, 12, and 19
I’ll be making my first official political move of my post-presidency on Thursday, headlining a private fundraiser for the National DemocRAT Redistricting Committee at a private home in Washington. —Barack Hussein Obama
How badly would Obama get booed if he threw out the first pitch at tonight’s All Star Game? —Whistleblower Senior Spoiled Sports Editor Andy FurBall
Joey Votto might’ve won last night’s Home Run Derby if only he’d been included as one of the contenders. —Reds Fans
Last year at the Republican National Convention in Cleveland, I tried to get myself on TV by hanging out with the protesters. —Delusional Ohio Governor John Kasich
Thanks for not publishing a complete list of the Republican Senators who voted to approve Loretta Lynch for Obama’s Racist Attorney General. —Ohio Senator Rob “Fighting for Sodomy Rites” Portman, Even Less Popular With Real Republicans These Days
Here’s more good news: The Obama Administration spent more than $3.5 million to try to find out why unattractive lesbians are fat. —Trump’s Office of Management and Budget Director Mick Mulvaney
Look at it this way: 49 out of 50 priests are not pedophiles, and that also includes bishops and cardinals. —Pope Francis
Would we sound racist if we said everything looks Black during a severe storm warning? —Cincinnati TV Weather Guessers
How’s this for a Cincinnati Slogan—Sluggers and Muggers and Unhugable Thuggers? —Caucasians in Clifton
If it doesn’t rain all day, Friday could be the greatest Bastille Day celebration ever. —Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo
Has everybody forgotten that on yesterday’s date in 1789, people in France got a holiday when revolutionaries stormed the Bastille? — Pierre Leach
Is America’s boycott on French products still in effect? —Goof Doofus
Friday was also the day the CamBoozler always used to join me at what one of our favorite fine-dining establishments in Northern Kentucky, Chez Bastille, that was then located at 303 Court Street in Covington. —Terry “The Smiling Jailer” Carl
The food was so good, it wasn’t surprising Chez Bastille was so hard to get into. —Whistleblower Food Critic Martin Upchuck
We understand Chez Bastille had a great wine list. —Michael Liquid Plummer and Nathan “Cornbread” Smith
Was that Chez Bastille restaurant approved by Weight Gainers? —Marc Wilson and Scott Pass “The Biscuits” Kimmich
Folks who used to eat there all the time say, “Once you were there, you probably would’ve found it even more difficult to leave.” —Kenton County Commonwealth Attorney E. Rob Sanders
Do you know any young men who’d like to learn French? —Vanilla Hills Cougars and MILFs
French Sex is just a euphemism for Oral Sex. —Phyllis on Madison
The word “Bikini” is French, ne l’est pas? —Miss Vicki
Does anybody know the second line Winston Churchill’s of “The French, the French, a curious race …?” —Horny in Hebron
On what date should they celebrate Bastille Day in Kentucky? —Trish the Dish at Channel 19 News
Will The Blower really be displaying pictures of our attractive undressed women taken at Wednesday’s National Nude Day Photo Contest? —The Northern Kentucky Nudist Camp in Florence.
I got some great pictures when I flew over in my helicopter last year. —Dan Carroll, WCPO-TV’s Chopper 9 Helicopter Reporter
Remember: We never print all the bad stuff we know and certain people ought to be damn glad we don’t, especially Jean Robert de Cavel. Does anybody remember when Cincinnati State’s Culinary Program lost $217,000 a few years ago? Surprise, surprise! Jean-Robert was its “chef in residence.”
— Whistleblower Official Weekly Disclaimer —
Sometimes The Blower makes fun of Francophobia to show that French bashing is not acceptable in our society. This should be clear to anybody who isn’t a French Hater.
This publication is a work of fiction. Any similarity to persons living or dead without satirical intent is purely coincidental, especially people who think French fries are a great example of French cooking.
INSIDE BASEBALL ALL STAR GAME HOT LINE
e-mail your political play-by-play today.
Some all star items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally all star subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use more.
WHISTLEBLOWER VIDEO OF THE DAY
New Yorkers Take Solace In Baseball After 9/11
(Sent in by Cincinnati Reds Broadcaster Marty Brennaman, whose hair has almost completely grown back since he had his head shaved for charily several years ago. )
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