SUNDAY, DECEMBER 27, 2015
More Politics Unusual
THE LATEST POLLS: Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says some may consider it politically incorrect to say so, but America remains a strongly Christian nation. A sizable majority of Americans still believe the central Christian tenet that Jesus Christ is the son of God sent to Earth to die for their sins. Most will attend religious services this holiday season. Americans continue to regard Christmas, the day that celebrates the birth of Christ, as the nation’s most important holiday. [READ MORE HERE]
OUR LATE NIGHT TV JOKEWATCHER says this week’s shows were all re-runs, which means you’ve heard their best jokes before, and come to think of it, they weren’t all that good.
HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says on this date in 1831 Charles Darwin set sail in the Beagle, but you probably won’t see a Christmas display of that at the Lizard Museum in Northern Kentucky.
MAYBE THAT’S WHY OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE chose Charles Darwin’s “It is not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change.”
LIBERAL LUNACY: In Human Events’ “365 Ways to Drive a Liberal Crazy,” # 102: “Tell a liberal how much you appreciate that the Obama economy is a system of checks and balances. He writes the checks, you pay the balances.”
GOING GALT: The phrase ‘Going Galt’ doesn’t simply mean getting angry. Going Galt’ means asking in the face of new taxes and government controls, “Why work at all?” “For whom am I working?” “Am I a slave?”
IN THIS WEEK’S COLUMN IN PATRONAGE COUNTY TITLED “JOB SECURITY,” we learned why elected officials need not worry. Their jobs are safe, as long as the public is lazy enough to need announcers to watch a football game. That op-ed column first appeared in the legendary Mt. Washington Press on December 24, 1980.
NOW HERE’S THE LATEST FROM BUNKY TADWELL, found in “Erotic Christmas Poems,” available at better sticky pages bookstores everywhere.
Ode to the New Year
Oh, the New Year’s a’comin’,
It don’t look so hot.
Yes, the New Year’s a’comin’.
Unfortunately I’m not.
MEANWHILE, OUR MUCKRAKER says when Sharon Coolidge’s so-called report in The Fishwrap about how FOP Police Union LODGE #69 President Kathy Harrell had been voted out came across the Whistleblower Newswire, The Muckraker wondered where the rest of the story was. [READ MORE HERE]
SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL: This week, let’s all re-read “The Bobby Blevins Story.”
WHISTLEBLOWER SENIOR BUSINESS EDITOR MERRILL FORBES says according to The Street, when it comes to analyzing the effects of rising interest rates, there’s no dead horse left to beat. The financial press has thoroughly hammered this particular story into a bloody pulp. Let’s just bury the poor carcass and move on to two types of investments that will prove salient in the coming week: defense stocks and gold.What do they have in common? They both thrive on fear and crisis, which are in abundant supply as we head into a holiday-shortened trading week before the start of a new and fretful year.
THE FREE GRAIN PARTY still stands as the last refuge of anyone who’s willing to help himself from the stores of others, like Keely Mullen — the college student who publicly embarrassed herself on national television when Neil Cavuto simply asked her how she thought America should pay for more ‘free’ government programs — has been caught in a lie. During the interview, Mullen advocated for taxing the rich in order to pay for free college tuition, along with other social programs. Cavuto said that method couldn’t possibly pay for all the entitlements she was demanding, and asked if she believed America should tax more middle class families like her own.
“I come from an extremely working class family, and my family is already on numerous forms of government assistance,” Mullen told Cavuto, explaining why her family could not be taxed at a higher rate.
According to New Boston Post, Mullen — like Jonathan Butler, the Mizzou protestor who went on a hunger strike — is from an incredibly wealthy family. Mullen’s alma mater Francis W. Parker High School, which offers K-12th grade education, costs between $27,090 and $34,560 annually. That’s not exactly a place for the people on endless government assistance programs. Steve Mullen, Keely’s father and an active social justice warrior on Facebook, lives in a home that he purchased in 2005 for $1,060,000. He currently is employed as an instructor, but in the past spent time as an ad composer and producer for American Airlines, Budweiser, and Corona. No doubt that Mullen’s family has benefited from evil corporations who should be taxed to oblivion.
FREE GRAIN PARTY MEMBERS include all DemocRATS, RINO Republicans, some TEA Partiers, quite a few Independents, disgruntled postal workers, senior citizens demanding free prescriptions, those who believe bigger government is the answer to all their problems, everybody who said “what Bill Clinton did was indefensible, but he shouldn’t be removed from office,” and those who think pork-barrel spending is OK as long as their district gets the money.
Unfortunately, that group probably doesn’t include all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters Who Put The Positively Worst President in History In The White House—Twice, and get all of their information from our Obama Supporters in the Press.
FINALLY, AT YESTERDAY’S MEETING OF THE CONSERVATIVE AGENDA, Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane what kept why he was so late arriving at the meeting. “This is one of the busiest times of the year at The Blower,” Kane explained. “We have to come up with the Top Ten Whistleblower Predictions that came true, and this year there were so many to choose from.”
Plagiarism Count: Unattributed material was filched from a mere 742 different websites for the production of today’s Blower, many of our filches were from our friends at Weasel Zippers.
AND COMING UP IN “THE WEEK THAT WILL BE”:
MONDAY (DECEMBER 28) The Blower will be getting ready for 2016 as we mark the 388 Days of Dishonesty and Division for America remaining during the Dark Ages of Obama’s Second Term, unless the First Black President in History is impeached.
TUESDAY (DECEMBER 29) our Real Subscribers will most likely be telling us about their phony resolutions they don’t intend to keep in their Real E-Mails.
WEDNESDAY, (DECEMBER 30) would probably be a good time to tell you about all those 2015 predictions that came true.
THURSDAY (DECEMBER 31) we’ll be singing Auld Lang Syne at our New Year’s Eve Party.
THE FIRST LINE OF FRIDAY’S (JANUARY 1) LIMERICK IS: “The biggest story we found last year.”
AND SATURDAY (JANUARY 2) we hope our Snitches are sobered up by then, or we won’t have much of an E-dition.
Remember: We never print all the bad stuff we know and certain people ought to be damn glad we don’t, especially all those folks who attended last year’s Whistleblower New Year’s Eve Party, as this Award Winning Illustration from Artis Conception’s Archives clearly shows.
WEEK IN REVIEW HOT LINE
e-mail your revolutionary recaps today
Some political score-keeping items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally political score-keeping subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more.
Whistleblower Holiday Video of the Week
The Obama Christmas Song for Liberals
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