Sunday, May 17, 2015
Happy International Day Against Homophobia and Transphobia Day, Everybody!
At least that’s what Obama’s White House claims in this Official Statement: “Michelle and I join our fellow Americans and others around the world in commemorating the International Day Against Homophobia and Transphobia on May 17. We take this opportunity to reaffirm that lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) rights are human rights, to celebrate the dignity of every person, and to underscore that all people deserve to live free from fear, violence, and discrimination, regardless of whom they choose to sodomize.”
The big day must’ve caught everybody by surprise, since we didn’t even see a single word about “Homophobia and Transphobia Day” anywhere above the Kroger Banner at the bottom of the front page of Sunday’s Fishwrap, and the “Forum Section” was all about litter. This never would’ve happened if disgraced former editrix Wedgie Washburn hadn’t been bounced out on her bony ass.
Our Gregarious Grammarian says the word should be “whom,” not “who,” but for all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Voters Who Put Obama In The White House—Twice, and get all of their information from our Obama Supporters in the Press, as Hillary might say, “What difference would that make?”
Over at Citizens for Community Values, Homophobic Transphobe-in-Chief Phil Burr-ess didn’t even have a chance to blast out a fund-raising e-mail to protest the event.
At Cincinnati City Hall, Clown-cil Gay Chris Squealback didn’t have time to organize a rally at on Fountain Square.
Ohio RINO Senator Rob “Fighting for Same Sex Sodomy” Portman didn’t mention a word about today’s “Homophobia and Transphobia Day” at Saturday night’s Hamilton County RINO Party Lincoln-Reagan Day Dinner, even after Ohio First District Conservative Congressman Steve Chabothead accused Hillary of being for “Marriage Equality,” the same as Portman.
CH Snitch at 1000 Main Street says Hamilton County Prosecutor “JayWalking Joe” Deters didn’t even think to include pot-smoking hermaphrodites in his announcement supporting the legalization of marijuana.
Whistleblower Alternate Life-Style Contributors Ben Dover and Phil McKrevis said last night prancing perverts didn’t know the first thing about today’s “Homophobia and Transphobia Day” celebration at Simon Says, one of the oldest gay bars in Cincinnati, frequented by some of the oldest gay patrons in town.
In Anderson, Forrest Gump School Board Members still have time to make a bold and unprecedented announcement of a “Homophobia and Transphobia” interim school superintendent to replace “Smiling Dallas” Jackson after Monday’s 7:00 AM “double top secret special meeting.”
Whistleblower Senior Spoiled Sports Editor Andy FurBall says the Cincinnati Reds didn’t have time to order 30,000 Homophobe and Transphone Bobble Butt Dolls to give away at Sunday’s game.
In Northern Kentucky, Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says there was no time before Tuesday’s 2015 Primary Elections for James Comer’s Political Enemies to have Conservative Blogger Michael Adams leak accusations that the Republican Gubernatorial Candidate had abused a left-handed Lithuanian Lesbian in College, or that Matt Bevin once attended a cock fight where gay guys were fighting with their cocks.
Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says according to a recent Gallup survey, less than 1% (actually only .8 %) is part of a same-sex couple, but Political Correctness dictates that .8% of the population may tell the other 99.2% how to live.
Meanwhile, Former President George W. Bush delivered his first commencement speech since he left the White House on Saturday afternoon at Southern Methodist University. While defending religious liberty in the aftermath of the gay marriage legislation debate in states such as Indiana and Arkansas, Bush remarked, “It is essential for the nation’s future that we remember that the freedom to worship who we want, and how we want – or not to worship at all – is a core belief of our founding.”
More Politically Incorrect News Later.
We were going to have lunch at Chick Fil A today, but somebody said they’re closed on Sunday, because they claim it’s the Lord’s Day of all things.
